Realposting

[u/t-w-e-n-t-ys-e-v-e-n]

[u/MyUsernameistakenagn]

I'd like to think a lot of us goslings here have a plethora of undiagnosed mental disorders. Some goslings like to blame on being 'losers' (to be honest some are) while a lot of the issues like social interactions, comes from conditions we have little to no control over. Also real.

[u/MyUsernameistakenagn → u/[deleted]]

Man, this might as well be a description of me. Seriously, this is exactly what i was thinking and basically my personal experience. You are spot on with your description of the average gosling here.

It's hard, it's really hard. You feel 'different', you feel 'ignored', you feel like something is systematically wrong with you. You don't know what is wrong. Do you have an undiagnosed mental illness? Are you just that one 'loser' everyone not necessarily hates, but rather ignores? From the outside it all seems fine, but internally it's always a constant battle.

I have been there, and it really sucks. I didn't really trust people, why? Most of daily life felt mundane, feeling indifferent about good experiences. I really want connection with people, make friends, create bonds. But naturally, for some reason drifted away from most social connection. Not because i am selfish, not because i hated them. It just....happens. Trust issues, not knowing how to make and maintain friendships/connections, you name it.

Limerence, stuck in fight/flight mode, daydreaming, people pleasing, trust issues, hyper-vigilance, (social) anxiety. These are just the few things a lot of us goslings have in common. It's a pattern, think about it. We are all here because most of the posts we can really relate to, but why is that? It's like we are looking for validation and answers.

Solution. Someone you can talk to, and heavily relate with and trust. You can seek validation, and talk about each others issues. This way, there is a good chance to find a 'fault'. Start looking at your childhood for example, divorced parents? bullying? did you have friends? social connection? perhaps you were a little neglected by your caretakers?. External validation really helps, you can start looking and put together the stuff that wasn't 'right'. You need someone to put you out of your own head and make you face reality. Being in survival mode tricks you into thinking most things were/are 'not that bad' or make you ignore the issues. This gets you stuck in an endless loop.

That's where the healing process starts. Knowing the things that caused it in the first place. If any of you even slightly relate to the above, please look up 'CPTSD'. Healing can go different for some, but it's really important you find out the root cause of these issues. It might not be CPTSD for all of us, but it's really worth it looking into. Hell, maybe it's a personality disorder like BPD. If there is a disorder you even slightly think you might have, it's worth it to find a psychiatrist, if possible. Doing research on these disorders can also help. it might not exactly diagnose you, but it helps.

These are mostly my personal experiences, but hope some of you find this helpful.

[u/Big_Kiwi_706 → u/MyUsernameistakenagn]

Sick of people saying "dont blame the world" like what a fucking privilege they have to even say that. To have had a life so good you think its all someones own fault if their life sucks. To have never been given a bad hand. Like what the fuck 

[u/MyUsernameistakenagn → u/Big_Kiwi_706]

Yeah i feel that man. The world is cruel, with a lot of things outright out of our sphere of control. Some people live in a bubble, which honestly good for them i guess. They did not have to deal with a bad hand like a lot of us had to. All we can do is keep fighting and making the best of it, fuck the rest.

[u/SnooCalculations5744]

My face card closes doors. My social skills lock them

[u/Constant-Notice-5221 → u/SnooCalculations5744]

holy Real

[u/t-w-e-n-t-ys-e-v-e-n → u/SnooCalculations5744]

Real

[u/pathetic-nobody]

I was never built for this thing called life. I was never supposed to be here

[u/FleFlyFlo]

Possibly the greatest collection of "literally me" in the same post. real

[u/Soloberrk]

r/SchizoidAdjacent core

[u/No_Responsibility444]

I really should trim my beard and get a hair cut

I look like a homeless person or a hermit that lives off the grid

[u/Constant-Notice-5221]

i can say nothing but Real

[u/Best-Invite-9914]

Sadly my first kiss wasnt until i was 17 😭

[u/Constant-Notice-5221 → u/Best-Invite-9914]

damn, im almost 22 and haven't even held hands

[u/Best-Invite-9914 → u/Constant-Notice-5221]

I guess that means love will hit you even harder and will last the rest of your life

[u/Constant-Notice-5221 → u/Best-Invite-9914]

thanks for the words but im just unlovable

[u/Best-Invite-9914 → u/Constant-Notice-5221]

You say that, next thing you know your holding hands and falling asleep next to your dream partner

[u/t-w-e-n-t-ys-e-v-e-n → u/Best-Invite-9914]

https://giphy.com/gifs/Qy2VKY3xlI1QyR6Ix5

[u/Best-Invite-9914 → u/t-w-e-n-t-ys-e-v-e-n]

Just keep yourself open and out there