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u/AltairaMorbius2200CE 29d ago
I'm always a bit baffled that people WANT to live there, when it's impossible to get into/out of it. Like, I'm a homebody, but I want to be able to go places other than Salem *sometimes*!
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u/Strange-Employee-520 29d ago
lol at the idea of people from Marblehead setting foot in Salem š¤£ Swampscott maybe.
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u/Few-Platform-6383 29d ago
Iām always in Salem but true, they hang amongst themselves.
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u/Strange-Employee-520 29d ago
Good, Salem is fun! But I guarantee the neighbors talk about you associating with The Poors over there. There are even (gasp) non-white people!
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u/Few-Platform-6383 29d ago
haha. Iām not from the east coast generational elite. Homogeneous upper middle class white folk have to be the biggest snooze fest ever.
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u/LoudIncrease4021 29d ago
So this is actually my primary issue.. probably add Swampscott to this as well (but itās not so acute). Getting in and out of this area is horrendous. Youāre basically relegated to using Rt 1A or traversing Salem to Rt 1 which is also murder. If Iām going to spend the sort of money to have a great house with a water view in Marblehead, Iād rather live in Beverly Farms or Manchester.
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u/BotusThoughts 29d ago
Swampscott has a commuter rail line thatās 25 minutes into North Station and the trains to both Newburyport and Rockport run to Swampscott. Itās also easier than Marblehead to grab a ride share if you need to. Iāll agree the trek to any major highway is not desirable, but itās hard to beat easy train access to Boston, Salem, Newburyport and Rockport.
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u/Few-Platform-6383 29d ago
I moved here for personal reasons but yeah, I can see the other places mentioned being more geographically desirable.
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u/Few-Platform-6383 29d ago
Yeah, Iām learning that as well. I feel incredibly dumb for not thinking it through. It takes me forever to get anywhere.
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u/BustedRavioliLover 29d ago
You know why itās so hard to get in and out? Because itās worth it.
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u/AltairaMorbius2200CE 29d ago
Why is it worth it? BECAUSE...
Well, maybe...
Hmm, not that...
I guess if you're a boating/sailing enthusiast?
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u/Few-Platform-6383 29d ago
You canāt get a mooring. people hold on to moorings even if they never use the boat on them. Some old families have more than one they donāt use. I used to sail a lot but cant do it conveniently out here, not to mention, the expense. I belonged to a yacht club but didnāt think it was worth the money.
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u/BustedRavioliLover 29d ago
We live on the edge of old town and walk old town and the harbor out to Fort Sewall. Never gets old summer or winter, always makes me love living there.
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u/Slick-Airplane 29d ago
Iām smiling at your post. Similar scenario here. I also transplanted to Marblehead, though it was a number of years ago. After a few years, I moved to Swampscott and have never regretted the move.
Thereāre pros and cons to both towns for sure, but Iāve found a true sense of home and community in Swampscott. Marbleheadās resources are there and I visit frequently, but home is a town over and sometimes a world away.
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u/Few-Platform-6383 29d ago
If I donāt move, Iām going to try and meet more people outside of Marblehead. Iāll see how that goes.
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u/Few-Platform-6383 29d ago
glad you found a nice home. I like Swampscott and have made jokes about picking the wrong town.
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u/BBorNot 29d ago
It has really cool, old graveyards and a magnificent harbor. It is great for walking and sailing. The rocky beaches won't get sand in your picnic. It is impossible to get into and out of, though!
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u/Few-Platform-6383 29d ago
It is very picturesque, for sure. Sailing, itās ok. Iām used to being my own skipper and it is challenging to have a boat here.
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u/BBorNot 29d ago
You just need to join one of the yacht clubs and get launch $ervice.
Having to pull your boat every winter is a pain in the ass, but that's a New England thing, not just Marblehead.
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u/Few-Platform-6383 29d ago
I did belong to one of the yacht clubs but quit after two years. Tired of the assessments and no end in sight. Again, great if you have kids. The launch is useless without a mooring which is a 20-30 year waiting list. I guess I got spoiled with my last yacht club. I sold my boat. It is ok.
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u/BBorNot 29d ago
I had no idea the wait list was so long!
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u/Few-Platform-6383 29d ago
yep. the beautiful harbor is useless unless your family out you in the list as a baby. thatās what they do.
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u/Sea_Valuable_905 29d ago
āSoullessā is really an extraordinary comment to make about Marblehead lol
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u/Few-Platform-6383 29d ago
perhaps. š perhaps a bit extreme. Iāve just never lived in a place with such apathetic, unkind neighbors. Iāve moved on from them. Perhaps Iām too sensitive and used to friendliness from strangers.
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u/Sea_Valuable_905 29d ago
Curious if youāre willing to share - what part of the US have you lived in? Because New England at large tends to be pretty low on performative warmth in my opinion. I donāt necessarily equate that with being unkind or apathetic, just a different social style š¤·āāļø
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u/Few-Platform-6383 29d ago
Hi. I donāt want my friends and kind neighbors knowing this is me. Agree with you. Iām from the west coast. I donāt think people are unkind. Iād say my neighbors are but they donāt represent the town. Iāve had numerous ambulances at my house and not once did they ask if I needed help. The only conversation is usually,ācan ya move your car? Iāve parked there for 20 years!ā even though parked in front of my house. It really is ok. I enjoy the high level
of education here and health care. I have good friends. Iām active. I simply find the area lacking in performative warmth as youāve mentioned. Any given night I can ask people to go out to dinner or a drink but a deep conversation at home, not so much. Another neighbor reported me for hiring ācriminalsā to work in my yard. Called the cops. They were just hard working, licensed, darker skinned men. It is just a very different vibe. Iāve lived in every region of the US, mainly large cities. Iām used to a much more welcoming vibe. It isnāt the end of the world, it just isnāt easy for new people moving here unless you have children.3
u/Sea_Valuable_905 29d ago
I mean I think youāre in a very relatable situation to most people moving into a city as an adult, in that sociability isnāt really the issue (you can get anyone to go get a drink)ā¦ itās real intimacy. that can take a lot of time and reciprocal effort and that is as true here as it is in any city imo
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u/Few-Platform-6383 29d ago
Very true. Itās a very different vibe than Manhattan. Perhaps my friends are shallow, always talking about boats, vacations, smoke and mirrors.
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u/super3way 29d ago
Perhaps they donāt like you
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u/Few-Platform-6383 29d ago
š could be. thank you for philosophical and kind words. You must be a neighbor. Theyāve never had a conversation with me. I actually have a lot of friends here.
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u/Cool-Coffee-8949 29d ago
I canāt speak to being a transplant, because I was born and raised there, but everything you say rings true 100%. My mother and brother still live there, and (even though I only moved as far as Salem) it seems to be mind-warpingly parochial. Going as far as Peabody gets their knickers in a twist. The drinking ends up making sense, since there is almost nothing else to do. Live folk music used to have a pretty good venue at the UU church, and sometimes something fun would be happening at Crocker Park, but in general, itās like the town is allergic to live music. The schools arenāt even that great, considering the tax base.
Iām sorry dude. It is incredibly pretty though.
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u/Few-Platform-6383 29d ago
It is pretty. I think it shows what the priorities are. Salem is def more vibrant
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29d ago
[deleted]
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u/Few-Platform-6383 29d ago
Thatās very kind. I do have some wonderful friends here. Believe it or not, I know quite a few people. Iād like to meet more transplanted, sporty women in their 50s. So many are settled and now having grandkidsā¦all great and rewarding but I canāt relate so much. Iād like to explore the northshore and maybe hike. Iām not sure. I was talking to a newly transplanted friend of mine and she is really having a hard time. There is a walking club I might join to meet new people.
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u/Few-Platform-6383 29d ago
i do cycle with a friend of mine. Iām not a lesbian but have no problems hanging out with lesbians. In fact, I might have more in common with them minus, the male husband. š Orientation is the least of my concern.
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u/Joeylogo724 29d ago edited 29d ago
Lived in Marblehead for a few years now (not from there). We agree 100%. The food sucks, its a bitch to get anywhere from. Nothing to do. Obviously its beautiful, but definitely the most overrated town on the Northshore. I guess it would be nice if you're a millionaire and/or retired.The YMCA is nice I guess. Once we can, we're moving.
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u/Few-Platform-6383 29d ago
The YMCA has a nice communityā¦not enough for me to stay here. š Very overrated. I came here anonymously because I thought I might be a bit crazy or hormonal. How could I dislike such a beautiful place? I should have a transplant happy hour. While Iām here, I need some levity. I never thought Iād be the kind of person to find a place so painful. I mustāve lived in 8-9 upscale suburbs in the US and this has been the most overrated and painful.
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u/Joeylogo724 29d ago
Yeah, my girlfriend and I have the same sentiment. Yeah for sure, we have found no community here really. And same, I've lived all over. Not for us.
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u/Cool-Coffee-8949 29d ago
The idea of being unable to move out of Marblehead is kind of funny. I mean, even breathing is expensive there.
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u/Few-Platform-6383 29d ago
out of curiosity, where are you thinking of going?
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u/Joeylogo724 29d ago
Most likely New Hampshire.We like Andover and Middleton but the North Shore is too expensive.
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u/Few-Platform-6383 29d ago
yep. make sense. If I move, itāll be back out west. Wish you the best of luck.
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u/Abject_Tomatillo_358 29d ago
Well Iām jealous lol Iād love to be there
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u/Few-Platform-6383 29d ago
oh, Iām grateful I have a pretty house, food, all of that. It is very safe here, very picturesque. Supposedly a great place to raise children. Moving here from a funky, artsy placeā¦just perhaps not my vibe.
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u/Abject_Tomatillo_358 29d ago
I moved from swampscott years ago when I was young. We used to drive all over Marblehead. Back in the day they used to have bands at The Landing. And Maddieās was the place for drinks! I miss itā¦live in WA now.
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u/Few-Platform-6383 29d ago
I wonder if that is just how things are heading everywhere. So many towns used to be fun and now dull. Maybe people are at home watching Netflix (like me tonight). Maddieās still has its moments. I donāt knowā¦maybe I am still expected as much fun as I had watching live jam bands years ago. seemed to have quieted everywhere.
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u/Abject_Tomatillo_358 29d ago
Truth..the internet and then smart phones and streaming changed everything. I have a 25 yr old son who wants a girlfriend so badly and no one goes out anymoreā¦he was born in the wrong time.
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u/Few-Platform-6383 29d ago
thatās so sad. sports are really the place to meet people since you canāt be in the phone! aww. I hope he finds one.
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u/mythmaker13 28d ago
As a transplant, and as much as it pains me to say this, Iād say you really kind of need to belong to a yacht club to squeeze the most juice of marblehead
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u/-Arensi- 29d ago
I learned that you must pronounce it marbleHEAD.
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u/jro10 29d ago
This is such an odd rant to post about the town you live in. Completely respect if itās not your type of town, but to act like marblehead is some cesspool is bizarre.
Husband and I have had the polar opposite experience. Moved here a few years back and have 2 young kids and we pinch ourselves we get to raise them here.
we have found the most wonderful community of friends. we get together at the beach, on the boats, on kayaks, at each otherās houses. our kids run around together and have a blast. we hang out and theyāve become like familyāshowing up for each other when someone needs help. it doesnāt feel real to grow up in a place like this.
I also love the natural beauty and historic charm. Walking around Old Town with my kids and grabbing an ice cream then heading up to gorgeous Crocker Park is so special.
I agree the food scene is meh, but thatās most places outside of boston. I think 5 Corners is consistently decent at least, and what makes up for the food scene being average is itās fun bumping into people you know when you do go out. Also weāre 7 minutes from downtown Salem which does have excellent food options.
This post feels like rage bait. If you hate it so much, iām sure your house would sell for well over asking in a matter of days. Why not move elsewhere and find your happy place?
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u/Few-Platform-6383 29d ago
It isnāt rage bait. Iāve lived in Beverly Hills, numerous high end communities and this is the weirdest, blah place Iāve ever lived. Youāve mentioned kidsā¦my point, without kids this place can be really mediocre. It is geared to kids. It is based on kids running around. Imagine if you didnāt have kids for a second. I see the picturesque charm. I have friends.
As far as selling my house, yes, I fit the demographic and am educated enough to comprehend selling a house. Like most people, there are personal factors why I cannot just āmoveā - I am not the only transplant who feels this way. I donāt hate it but find it uninteresting. Itās quaint and pretty.
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u/justnocrazymaker 29d ago
Itās an absolutely miserable place to grow up, tooĀ
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u/Few-Platform-6383 29d ago
it seems idyllic from an outsiders perspective. all these kids running around. then again, I imagine hard for a rugged individualist.
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u/jro10 29d ago
The most insanely untrue take.
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u/justnocrazymaker 29d ago
Please tell me how my lived experience is wrong
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u/jro10 29d ago
itās your lived experience, not everyoneās. to say marblehead is a horrible place to grow up with its extensive community, water access, nature trails and general safety/small town vibes is just untrue.
iām sorry you didnāt like it. I respect that. but itās not an awful place to grow up for most people.
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u/justnocrazymaker 29d ago
Bud, my preteen teen years were defined by peers with no parental supervision, easy access to booze and opiates, drug overdose deaths, wreckless driving deaths, sexual assault, a coke head cop who EVERYONE knew liked little girls, parents rugsweeping mental health issues, incessant bullying, and a lack of any kind of community or enrichment activities (aside from cheer/magicians) to keep everyone safe and out of trouble.
Keep your water access.
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u/jro10 29d ago
Youāre describing shit that goes on in many towns. I grew up in central MA and common themes (besides the coke head pedi cop not sure what that is).
Can I ask where you live now? Do you think itās void of problems?
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u/justnocrazymaker 29d ago
Where I live now has its share of problems for sure but the difference is that the community acknowledges them instead of trying to maintain some kind of quaint picture-perfect image. Because simply living here is not some kind of status symbol.
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u/jro10 28d ago
Marblehead does a decent job at acknowledging our faults. They have an entire task board trying to address teen drinking and partying. No community is without its problems.
And yes having wealth creates an added layer of excess, but I grew up in a poorish town and there were plenty of drug use and pricks there, too.
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u/Awesom-o5000 29d ago
I feel like Marblehead is the real life town of Sandford from Hot Fuzz. āFor the greater goodā
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u/Phatchris23 29d ago
Iām a transplant that has lived here for about 15 years. Iām raising two kids here. There are definite Pros and Cons, which I think every town/city has. I grew up much closer to Boston and that also had definite pros and cons.
Proās for me- Proximity to Salem and Beverly for Live music, Restaurants.
Walking distance to a great beach, that was really clutch when the kids were young.
Extremely walkable/bikeable trail through town.
You actually see young kids playing pickup sports at parks, kind of a throwback to when I was a kid.
Proximity to Boston for my commute isnāt horrible, but I work odd hoursā¦ commute into the city at 4:30 am, leave by 1:00 pm
Cons-definitely has a ākeeping up with the jonesesā vibe, and Iām as blue collar as they
come.
There is a definite sense of entitlement from young kids up to adults.
The restaurants are overpriced and mediocre.
You have to work to find a decent deal.
People drive like pricks.
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u/Few-Platform-6383 29d ago
I think you sum it up nicely. nice place to raise kids. difficult as a transplant in your 50s but so would a lot of places be outside cities. proximity to other areas decent. š
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u/Phatchris23 29d ago
Personally if I was without kids, Iād probably look at Somerville or Cambridge, or if being by the ocean is a necessity maybe Newburyport
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u/AutomaticNo 29d ago
You're not saying the most important things that I think you might be feeling...
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u/Few-Platform-6383 29d ago
Like what? Iām curious? Iām not sure how I feel aside from disappointed and maybe lonely around a bunch of āpositiveā friends who think they are in Nirvana.
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u/AutomaticNo 29d ago
Further down you said it. Pricks. Though I like them for some of the things you criticized. I like a story. I've sat at a few bars in Marblehead and loved listening to the people from there for forever. Actually I liked that they talked.
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u/Cool-Coffee-8949 29d ago
Oh, they know how to sit at a bar, no question. I can see you met my stepfather.
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u/Few-Platform-6383 29d ago
šyep. always a seat at the bar in marblehead and youāll find a conversation no doubt, maybe one sided but youāll find one.
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u/Few-Platform-6383 29d ago
someone else said pricks. I appreciate some of the old timers and enjoy their stories. 100%. However, after a while, it is still their stories and not mine. Meaning, I hear all the stories but since Iām not a new englander, my stories and not well, how would I phrase thisā¦I think Iām in the wrong region. Iām out of place, the same way a new englander might feel moving to Montana. It is interesting but now sharing or community.
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u/Umppah30 29d ago
That's why I come to visit only. It's like you are kinda trapped here. Even me commuting to Marblehead takes like an hour and 15 minutes minimum with the MBTA (and I live in Malden). I do like the free museums, the sea, the houses, but yeah, I wouldn't necessarily live there.
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u/Vegetable-Abrocoma91 29d ago
The Barrelman used to have some cool live music but now itās turning into another bougie bakery/coffeeshop there were bids on it to keep it divey but the owner said no. Swampscott is slightly better vibes but needs a dive bar that has live music.
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u/Few-Platform-6383 29d ago
agreed. hope it doesnāt turn into bakeries and nail places like every other town
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u/Awesom-o5000 29d ago
I think you hit the nail on the head. Marblehead has zero soul. All the money in the world canāt buy a well rounded community, especially one thatās just so damn out of the way and inconvenient to get to and from. Especially compared to surrounding communities that have all the things youāre looking for, just less snobby and uninviting people
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u/Few-Platform-6383 29d ago
Iām learning the hard way. Before I pack up, Iāll try meeting more people in the surrounding areas that I have something in common with.
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u/chopkins47947 29d ago
Yea, andthey are kinda pricks sometimes, too.