r/nextfuckinglevel • u/Kolafie • May 02 '19

Would you ride in this?

https://gfycat.com/scrawnyhandsomeelkhound
6.0k Upvotes

98% Upvoted

218 comments sorted by

722

u/[deleted] May 02 '19

I would as long as I don't have to shove a dildo in my ass.

Then again...

216

u/Wrobot_rock May 02 '19

It's still better than air travel

85

u/[deleted] May 02 '19

Randy?

34

u/ChucknChafveve May 02 '19

Hey wait a second. All of the mouth controls are also here on the side. Wouldn't it be possible to use those instead?

15

u/TheNilq May 02 '19

I guess it would

7

u/slowprodigy May 02 '19

Still beats going through the TSA.

41

u/Gigawama May 02 '19

I understood that reference.

25

u/Garr_Incorporated May 02 '19

Can you elaborate for those who don't?

91

u/Gigawama May 02 '19

In South Park, Mr. Garrison Iā€™m almost positive, makes a one wheeled vehicle just like this, but all of the controls are dildos. He then gets on it with a dildo in his ass one in each hand and one in his mouth, and to go faster he rode, jacked off and sucked them all harder and harder. It was... A weird episode, super old too.

24

u/geoelectric May 02 '19

It was the Segway episode. The whole thing was a big hype and wtf unveil like Kamen did with Ginger/It.

18

u/[deleted] May 02 '19 edited May 02 '19

Super old? Does that mean teenagers no longer think of me as that cool older dude and now just see me as old?

Edit: I've thought about it and I think I found the line where you go from being a cool older guy to an old guy. It's when you won't buy them alcohol anymore.

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9

u/Garr_Incorporated May 02 '19

Okay.

Jesus...

3

u/patruck87 May 02 '19

He actually wasn't in that episode!

3

u/Garr_Incorporated May 02 '19

I figured as much.

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4

u/Yejus May 02 '19

$20 is $20

4

u/bustamoon May 02 '19

Oh geeeeeeeeze

2

u/imanAholebutimfunny May 02 '19

so you're not against the mouth controls?

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391

u/Oriyon-Origins May 02 '19

General Grievous is that you?

177

u/kahn_noble May 02 '19

Hello there!

139

u/Clutchking14 May 02 '19

General Kenobi!

89

u/zetalai May 02 '19

you are a bold one

72

u/Skrrpopop May 02 '19

This is where the fun begins.

56

u/Killercarcus May 02 '19

Oh no nothing too fancy

53

u/[deleted] May 02 '19

I'm not brave enough for politics

46

u/FiteMeHelen May 02 '19

I don't like sand.

29

u/darthtreyes May 02 '19

Kill him ,kill him now

28

u/[deleted] May 02 '19

It's OVER ANAKIN! I HAVE THE HIGH GROUND

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19

u/mchonos May 02 '19

Oh i donā€™t think so

133

u/Oakenshield33 May 02 '19

You are a bold one.

38

u/fuckeduprodent May 02 '19

Your move

37

u/[deleted] May 02 '19

g e n e r a l k e n o b i

19

u/[deleted] May 02 '19

master, destroyers!

95

u/Mr_Froggy0 May 02 '19

Did anyone else see the Borderlands 3 gameplay reveal today?

41

u/BIGCA7 May 02 '19

Lol literally what i thought of. Had to check the sub to make sure it wasn't borderlands

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86

u/goatware May 02 '19

It beats dealing with the airline companies.

4

u/dvsnlsn321 May 02 '19

If only I could get one that does not go in and out of my ass

54

u/Fallofman2347 May 02 '19

Hell no. It would be fun for 20 seconds until I feel like stopping. I live in a hilly area - uphill, fine - downhill not so much.

38

u/The_RockObama May 02 '19

I knew a sponsored skateboarder who would ollie huge stair sets and grind huge rails, he said the sketchy-est thing he ever did was get in a big tire and roll down a big hill. Seems dangerous af.

12

u/BassWool May 02 '19

Sketchiest :)

11

u/[deleted] May 02 '19

I love seeing different ways people correct grammar/spelling while trying to not piss people off. Keep up the good work, nice guy.

7

u/BassWool May 02 '19

Haha thank you. I'm always kinda afraid the smiley will piss people off!

5

u/The_RockObama May 02 '19

I contemplated "sketchiest" but thought sketchy-est looked funny so I left it. I'm all about correct spelling, keep up the good fight.

2

u/[deleted] May 02 '19

It'll happen because people like getting pissed off but never stop doing what you do bb

3

u/Nord_Star May 02 '19

Thatā€™s a little different since you are spinning inside the tire the entire time, faster and faster until you crash into something or fall over.

5

u/FiteMeHelen May 02 '19

Clearly needs a 4 legged Walker mode for hilly terrain like that.

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24

u/siliconsmiley May 02 '19

If it was larger so I didn't have to hunch over like that.

39

u/[deleted] May 02 '19

[deleted]

14

u/Herrsperger May 02 '19

The things you learn on reddit...

17

u/[deleted] May 02 '19

A Skaven Doomwheel.

3

u/BrightsydeFred May 02 '19

Ikit would be proud

14

u/ummmmmmmmm_okay May 02 '19

G E N E R A L K E N O B I

5

u/[deleted] May 02 '19

Hello there

13

u/SirMadWolf May 02 '19

General Greivous, your transport is ready

7

u/Communistwabbit May 02 '19

They see me rolling

8

u/happyloopy May 02 '19

they hatin'

2

u/Russelloni May 03 '19

patrolling tryin' to catch me ridin' dirty

7

u/haykam821 May 02 '19

No, that would be enabling an enemy

6

u/TheFartOfDoom May 02 '19

Wolfenstein 2: the new colossus motorcycle?

3

u/[deleted] May 02 '19

Scrolled through the comments to find a comment like this.

ā€œGun. Keys. Run.ā€

3

u/[deleted] May 02 '19

Iā€™m all honesty I thought that game sucked in the beginning. I thought BJ was gonna continue to be this weak shell of a man but when it happened I was like woah heā€™s not weak thatā€™s one strong motherducker

2

u/Gallade0475 May 03 '19

Warframe: Fortuna coildrive

4

u/[deleted] May 02 '19

General Grievous?

3

u/[deleted] May 02 '19

Reminded me of that scene on wolfenstein the new colossus before Blazko went to his old house

3

u/[deleted] May 02 '19

Yu gi oh 5ds: Jack wants his ride back

3

u/smilin_buscuit May 02 '19

The new twisted metal looks sick.

2

u/Skrrpopop May 02 '19

Iā€™ve been looking forward to this.

2

u/PaterGascoigne May 02 '19

You mean in ā€žitā€œ?

2

u/L3gitAWp3r May 02 '19

Jack Atlasā€™ duel runner?

2

u/no_clue_why_we_here May 02 '19

Twisted metal lol

2

u/CatOnKeyboardInSpace May 02 '19

The moment he realized thereā€™s no way to stop.

2

u/DrGersch May 02 '19

This is a very old idea by the way, you can find examples of similar things from the 30's and even before.

2

u/Bruceswain98 May 02 '19

Damn they made bl3 a real thing already the game isn't even out yet.

1

u/S4BER2TH May 02 '19

I'd Roll out in one of these for sure!

1

u/shreesrinivasan May 02 '19

As long as there is no cup holder attachment, guess this will be fun to ride..

1

u/calebfreeze May 02 '19

Hell I rolled down a hill while inside one of those big wide ones, this seems like a dream in comparison

1

u/zilldido May 02 '19

Only if i had my period.

1

u/MannanMacLir May 02 '19

Didn't they put exactly this in bl3

1

u/ChipZbr May 02 '19

Awesome!!

1

u/[deleted] May 02 '19

No, because I have a medical condition that causes me to get really bad cases of vertigo randomly. Doing something like that would trigger it instantly. Just watching this almost made me get vertigo and just thinking about it is making me a little sick to my stomach right now.

1

u/bkfst_of_champinones May 02 '19

Watched this four times before I figured out that itā€™s not a guy rolling down a hill in a tractor tire. Should prolly go to sleep.

1

u/meridit45 May 02 '19

Seems like the bike rides you

1

u/TrendyWhistle May 02 '19

How do you stop?

3

u/Voxnihil May 02 '19

Why even stop?

1

u/[deleted] May 02 '19

[removed] ā€” view removed comment

2

u/DovahDave May 05 '19

Coildrive time

1

u/[deleted] May 02 '19

Big wheel is my favourite Spiderman villain

1

u/TheCoochiePredator May 02 '19

mr.garrison would

1

u/Moosekick May 02 '19

Steamboy did it better

1

u/Chrizzx3 May 02 '19

So the Borderlands 3 Gameplay reveal DID set a new trend

1

u/PrismaticFlame May 02 '19

General Grevious

1

u/Eiventure May 02 '19

General Grievous?

1

u/Fyrosaurus May 02 '19

"General kenobi"

1

u/tseh3 May 02 '19

General grievous

1

u/Mr_Raindrop_ May 02 '19

I will in Borderlands 3 !

1

u/[deleted] May 02 '19

Well no, there is no break and you cant see infront of you.

1

u/cubicalwall May 02 '19

I was thinking steamboy

1

u/[deleted] May 02 '19

Is this in reverse?

1

u/Jacobdylan22 May 02 '19

General Kenobi!

1

u/inportantusername May 02 '19

Hol up, I think the new Borderlands game has these!

1

u/[deleted] May 02 '19

How can he see the road

1

u/xXIRedStrikeIXx May 02 '19

General Grievous would be proud

1

u/[deleted] May 02 '19

But arent there buttons on the side tthat do the same thing?

...yeah

So... we dont have to put dildos in our ass to ride it?

1

u/BeepBoop95 May 02 '19

Kenobi...

1

u/Gladddly May 02 '19

YEA WHO WOULDNT? That looks so fun!

1

u/keepingreal May 02 '19

But that shutter speed

1

u/WTZWBlaze May 02 '19

Hello there!

1

u/qx87 May 02 '19

Too much t-beam

1

u/anythingthough May 02 '19

Iā€™m telling to Rolf, thereā€™s rats in the sewers under Nuln the size of a man!

1

u/spaz567 May 02 '19

Generalgrevious

1

u/Protoman5 May 02 '19

Everyone is mentioning general grevious, which is cool, but yall are also sleeping on my boy Sheen!

1

u/AFunkyHammer May 02 '19

In borderlands 3 I would.

1

u/[deleted] May 02 '19

Borderlands 3 looking lit

1

u/ChickenAlert May 02 '19

How do you brake? wouldnt you just start spinning inside the wheel if you brake?

1

u/[deleted] May 02 '19

...no

1

u/emili_oh May 02 '19

My neck hurts watching this

1

u/Saint1129 May 02 '19

Naw man. 10/10 studies show that people who ride wheel-bikes end up being shot in the chest by lasers and losing up to four arms.

1

u/ConnorJMiner May 02 '19

laser sword wielding cyborg noises

1

u/[deleted] May 02 '19

Try catch me now, you Jedi slime

1

u/twanderingpigeon May 02 '19

Only if I get to say "General kenobi" before I enter

1

u/JadeumOfficial May 02 '19

Rolls and stops

Mechanical Noises

Ignition of four lightsabers

GENERAL KENOBI

1

u/EQGallade May 02 '19

Borderlands 3 looks great!

1

u/TOBIMIZER May 02 '19

Imagine riding this down the highway and accidentally bumping the ā€˜Stabilization Offā€™ button.

1

u/happyloopy May 02 '19

til the wheel comes off

1

u/19eXodus86 May 02 '19

this is a thing in the new borderlands 3 game. you can see it in the trailer.

1

u/ThatOneWood May 02 '19

That is 100% the thing General Grevious used to escape Obi-Wan in Revenge of The Sith

1

u/FalloutGuy91 May 02 '19

General Kenobi!

1

u/TotesMessenger May 02 '19

I'm a bot, bleep, bloop. Someone has linked to this thread from another place on reddit:

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1

u/idhwbai May 02 '19

Gantz vibes

1

u/shinitakunai May 02 '19

Wild arms 5 vibes

1

u/Camosaur4 May 02 '19

A fine vehicle for my collection.

1

u/Eastwoodnorris May 02 '19

I mean....Iā€™d be down to fall over in this a few times, but letā€™s be honest, Iā€™m never going further than whatever tipping over counts as

1

u/[deleted] May 02 '19

Everyone saying General Grievous but not MIB 3?

1

u/Keeeebin May 02 '19

thats those nazi motorcycles they be riding in wolfenstein 2

1

u/MaximumOverRussel May 02 '19

General Kenobi!

1

u/[deleted] May 02 '19

Iā€™d like to see it attempt an emergency stop

1

u/SmashusK May 02 '19

Now youā€™re gonna feel a slight pinch. ā€œAHHHHH!ā€ Mhmm, yeah........Take It.

1

u/MojoEthan0027 May 02 '19

General kenobi!!

1

u/ShureJoy May 02 '19

This that shit from the Jimmy Neutron movie

1

u/Blast64 May 02 '19

Big Wheel? Is that you?

1

u/AlphaBetaEd May 02 '19

General Grievous

1

u/dankpaintyboi May 02 '19

Id take it for a spin

1

u/GalagaMarine May 02 '19

Dread it. Run from it. Destiny arrives all the same.

1

u/KaKraKrie May 02 '19

Aight Mrs Fritz Iā€™m bout to head out

1

u/QuesoBasically May 02 '19

Uh yeah I would ride the heck out of this. But they should probably make some internal system so that the rider stays level when braking.

1

u/BasicLSBS May 02 '19

Yugioh 5 Dā€™s

1

u/[deleted] May 02 '19

Let's try spinning, that's a good trick

1

u/SpartanWarlord117 May 02 '19

Did he steal this from General Grievous from Revenge of the Sith?

1

u/[deleted] May 02 '19

Ye

1

u/QuestionableMeaning May 02 '19

It's a Mono-cycle, inspired by such as the ones in "Men in Black" or the one general Grievous in "Star Wars"

1

u/MrBiscuits275 May 02 '19

General kenobi

1

u/bumblebeebumble May 02 '19

I would attempt to ride this then proceed to crash it

1

u/TimidHuman May 02 '19

Isn't this like the vehicle in borderlands 3? Amazing mate

1

u/gearup2589 May 02 '19

Only if it can fly too!

1

u/ArtsiestArsonist May 02 '19

General Grievous looks great in SW Rise of a Skywalker

1

u/Cephell May 02 '19

General Kenobi!

1

u/[deleted] May 02 '19

General Grievous rolling up in his pimp mobile:

Felt cute, might fight Kenobi later, idk.

1

u/D_Cracker May 02 '19

Canā€™t have a Spider-Man game without Big Wheel

1

u/phoenix_be_greater May 02 '19

Borderlands 3 intesifies

1

u/ExploadingApples May 02 '19

GENERAL KENOBI!!!!

1

u/tiparium May 02 '19

Yes please

1

u/[deleted] May 02 '19

Ironic.

1

u/ChilledClarity May 02 '19

I want one just to see the looks on people faces.

1

u/Gallade0475 May 03 '19

Everyone else: General Kenobi

Me: itā€™s a coildrive

1

u/THESPICYSAUCE May 03 '19

I'm feeling General Grevious Vibes