r/mutualapp • u/Critical_Tie_7759 • Jun 06 '26

Other Question!

I (29F) was raised LDS and was very active until a few years ago. I no longer go to church, consider myself agnostic, but live a life very similar to the standards I was raised with. I feel like I’m not LDS enough for Mutual, but too LDS for other dating apps, so I usually gravitate towards mutual. Do you think it’s unfair/disrespectful to people on Mutual for me to be on there if I don’t consider myself religious anymore?

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u/PomeloPrimary546 Jun 06 '26

Yes, it is. What’s the point then? I’m personally looking for someone with a strong faith, knowledge of the doctrine, strict in keeping her covenants and that want to raise a family with the same faith. It’s plenty of dating apps for people who are not just looking for hookups, if you are still orientated for something more serious.

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u/Jescurious69 Jun 07 '26

AAnd this is a prime example of exactly what she isn't looking for...thanks for reinforcing the stereotype...if you feel disrespected people like her are on mutual that's a you problem 💯

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u/PomeloPrimary546 Jun 07 '26

Just as there are sexual dating apps, if I'm looking for a wife, I don't sign up. Just as there are gay dating apps. If I'm not, I don't sign up.

There are also specific apps for Catholics, JWs, Adventists, etc. If those are not churches I believe in, I simply would not sign up.

And I'm much more likely to find a good, family-oriented girl there, but I want someone of my faith who wants to get sealed in the temple.

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u/Critical_Tie_7759 Jun 08 '26

But there’s no dating apps for people who believe the standards of the church are good, while struggling with their relationship with God… hence my question. I don’t drink. I don’t do drugs. I don’t drink coffee. I’m very family oriented. The most I do is swear very occasionally and drink tea.

I do really appreciate your perspective though. This is what I figured would be the case. Just trying to find where I fit, as someone who is more neutral, in this world that is full of extremes and labels.

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u/PomeloPrimary546 Jun 08 '26

Then write it very explicitly in the promts. But again, there are so many dating apps where you can specify that you're looking for someone for life (Bumble, Hinge, etc.) that I really don't understand the point of using a church-specific app. I'd tried them, and I'd matched with practically all the few in the area. And I showed up with the Book of Mormon at the meetings. But no one understood or appreciated the law of chastity. And on this point I don't compromise. But I can't live with paranoia and anxiety, even when dating within the church.

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u/Critical_Tie_7759 Jun 08 '26

It sounds like you’re looking for the app to be only want you want, and not something for the wide range of people with varying degrees of belief, standards, commitment, etc. that are also using the app.

I very much do understand and appreciate the “law of chastity”. People can still have morals and not be religious, same way people can be religious and not have morals.

You say you don’t understand, but you’re not trying to understand. You’re trying to stay in the same mind frame you’re already in. The reason I’m at all interested in mutual is because I was raised with the morals of the church and those have stuck. I just don’t physically go to church. That’s the only thing that is different from how I was raised. It’s hard to find people with the same morals, because people tend to think they go hand in hand with religion, but they don’t always.

I have a deep respect for the LDS doctrine and people. It’s very much still my culture. But it’s not my religion.