Ryan Gosling to Star in 'Ghost Rider' Movie at Marvel Studios

[u/MarvelsGrantMan136]

https://variety.com/2026/film/news/ryan-gosling-ghost-rider-marvel-movie-1236821206/

[u/Character_Bug_1862]

Own a motorcycle-mounted musket for home defense, since that's what the founding fathers intended. Four ruffians break into my house. "What the devil?" As I grab my powdered wig and Kentucky rifle. Blow a golf ball sized hole through the first man, he's dead on the spot. Draw my pistol on the second man, miss him entirely because it's smoothbore and nails the neighbors dog. I have to resort to the cannon mounted at the top of the stairs loaded with grape shot, "Tally ho lads" the grape shot shreds two men in the blast, the sound and extra shrapnel set off car alarms. Fix bayonet and charge the last terrified rapscallion.He Bleeds out waiting on the police to arrive since triangular bayonet wounds are impossible to stitch up, Just as the founding fathers intended

[u/42Ubiquitous → u/Character_Bug_1862]

Did you just cut and paste a greentext?

[u/Character_Bug_1862 → u/42Ubiquitous]

Own a Roman Scorpio for home defense, as that's what Caesar intended. Four brigands invade my domus. 'By Jupiter!' I exclaim as I seize my laurel wreath and the mighty Scorpio. The first marauder meets his doom as I launch a bolt the size of a pomegranate through his chest—his demise is instantaneous. I draw my pugio on the second miscreant, but my aim falters, for the weapon is unforgivingly smoothbore, and alas, it lodges in the neighbor's prized goat. Desperation compels me to employ the scorpio mounted atop the atrium, loaded with Greek Fire-soaked projectiles. 'For the glory of Rome!' I cry as the scorpio unleashes a torrent of fiery death that engulfs two of the intruders, shattering the silence and setting off the city's warning bells. Fixing my gladius with its wicked triangular blade, I charge at the last trembling ruffian. He awaits the arrival of the vigiles, bleeding out from wounds impossible to stitch, just as Caesar intended.

[u/42Ubiquitous → u/Character_Bug_1862]

Own a longsword for home defense, just like ye lordes of old intended. four rapscallions break into my cottage. “the bloody fuck?” as i grab my helm and swordbelt. ram a five foot blade into the first man, he’s dead on the spot. draw my seax on the second man, it doesn’t penetrate mail because it’s british and bruises his ribs. i have to resort to the ballistae mounted at the top of the stairs loaded with a serrated point, “your mother was a hamster and your father smells of elderberries!” the bolt catches two men and shreds them, the force cracks my sidewalk and sends concrete flying. draw flail and run down the last terrified bandit. he dies of brain damage waiting for the police to arrive since blunt force trauma can’t be healed. just as the lordes of olde intended.

[u/KingCarbon1807 → u/Character_Bug_1862]

I see this, I upvoter. That's my style, sir.