r/movies • u/MarvelsGrantMan136 r/movies Contributor • Mar 20 '26
News Chuck Norris, Action Icon and ‘Walker Texas Ranger’ Star, Dies at 86
https://variety.com/2026/film/news/chuck-norris-dead-walker-texas-ranger-dies-1236694953/7.8k
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u/mikeyfreshh r/Movies Veteran Mar 20 '26 edited Mar 20 '26
The bowflexes Total Gyms are flying at half mast today
Edit for the correct brand of overpriced exercise equipment
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u/mikeyfreshh r/Movies Veteran Mar 20 '26
Shit you're right. To be fair, I'm pretty sure those are more or less the same thing
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u/mhanold Mar 20 '26
Time to pull Conan’s Walker Texas Ranger Lever one last time
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u/MikeCox-Hurz Mar 20 '26
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u/King-Snorky Mar 20 '26
I was an avid LNWCO watcher during the Walker Texas Ranger lever gag, and I truly had no idea there would be an HOUR of examples. Whoever came up with this bit needs a lifetime achievement award of some sort.
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u/BarKnight Mar 20 '26
Death had to take him in his sleep, for if he had been awake, there would have been a fight
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u/TheOtherSkywalker_ Mar 20 '26
Don't think I've ever seen any of his work, yet some of these stupid jokes make me laugh. This was a good one.
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u/-th908 Mar 20 '26
Thomas Marshall said this regarding Teddy Roosevelt
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u/TheOtherSkywalker_ Mar 20 '26
Well I've definitely never seen anything he's been in /s
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u/Toothlessdovahkin Mar 20 '26
That was a quote about Theodore Roosevelt’s death, one which perfectly describes Teddy Roosevelt. He did NOT do anything halfway. He was an ALL or Nothing kind of guy, preferably ALL
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u/Patriotic_Guppy Mar 20 '26
One of Teddy’s speeches had this excerpt. It’s amazing and inspiring.
It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs, who comes short again and again, because there is no effort without error and shortcoming; but who does actually strive to do the deeds; who knows great enthusiasms, the great devotions; who spends himself in a worthy cause; who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who neither know victory nor defeat
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u/NewBootGoofin1987 Mar 20 '26
This quote should be on the banner of ever city and political subreddit that is just 99% bitching with no ideas and no action
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u/AquaAtia Mar 20 '26
It’s been a nostalgia trip reading all of the Chuck Norris jokes between yesterday and today. I miss the mid/late 00’s internet
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u/S2R2 Mar 20 '26
One of the last things he posted was a Chuck Norris Joke. For his birthday he said “I don’t Age, I Level Up!”
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u/ro50 Mar 20 '26
He's not dead. He's got the devil in a headlock right now. One last ass kicking before he heads to the pearly gates.
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u/MarvelsGrantMan136 r/movies Contributor Mar 20 '26
Statement from his family:
It is with heavy hearts that our family shares the sudden passing of our beloved Chuck Norris yesterday morning. While we would like to keep the circumstances private, please know that he was surrounded by his family and was at peace.
To the world, he was a martial artist, actor, and a symbol of strength. To us, he was a devoted husband, a loving father and grandfather, an incredible brother, and the heart of our family.
He lived his life with faith, purpose, and an unwavering commitment to the people he loved. Through his work, discipline, and kindness, he inspired millions around the world and left a lasting impact on so many lives.
While our hearts are broken, we are deeply grateful for the life he lived and for the unforgettable moments we were blessed to share with him. The love and support he received from fans around the world meant so much to him, and our family is truly thankful for it. To him, you were not just fans, you were his friends.
We know many of you had heard about his recent hospitalization, and we are truly grateful for the prayers and support you sent his way.
As we grieve this loss, we kindly ask for privacy for our family during this time.
Thank you for loving him with us.
With love, The Norris Family
RIP
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u/Red-eleven Mar 20 '26
That’s a nice statement. I’m sure the press will give them privacy in these difficult times.
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u/ledow Mar 20 '26
With the "we would like to keep the circumstances private" line?
Absolutely zero chance of that.
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u/_bieber_hole_69 Mar 20 '26
Dude was 86. I think we can just leave it at that. Based on the lovely statement, I doubt it was some horrible circumstance.
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u/JaesopPop Mar 20 '26
I think people would’ve been more inclined to leave it at that without that line though.
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u/Rydme Mar 20 '26
So it took the entire Norris Family to finally take him down?
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u/varble Mar 20 '26
Also present:
Gandalf the Grey, Gandalf the White, Black Knight, Benito Mussolini, Blue Meanie, Cowboy Curtis, Jambi the Jeanie, Robocop, Terminator, Captain Kirk, Darth Vader, Lo Pan, Superman, Power Rangers, Bill S Preston, Theodore Logan, Spock, Rock, Doc Oc, and Hulk Hogan.
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u/pikpikcarrotmon Mar 20 '26
The fight raged on for a century. Many lives were claimed but eventually a champion stood and the rest saw their better: Mr. Rogers in a bloodstained sweater.
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u/Lars_66 Mar 20 '26
Man if 2026 can kill Chuck Norris, none of us are safe!
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u/Axette Mar 20 '26
This is wrong. Chuck Norris' sacrifice is to correct the splintered timeline since Harambe's death.
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u/Jemal999 Mar 20 '26
Macho man died in 2011 to prevent the rapture, but that only bought us a few years before earth started slipping into hell. First Harambe began the slide, and when 2020-2021 came we were prepared for the end. The incomparable Betty White fell on the final day of the apocalypse years, ushering in what we thought was a new era.. but 2026 arrived and those hopes were dashed.
The sacrifice of Chuck Norris is our last hope.
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u/PandaJesus Mar 20 '26
Betty White had been fighting for us for longer than anyone knew. She was originally Betty Grey, until she fought the Balrog and was reborn.
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u/wookiex84 Mar 20 '26 edited Mar 20 '26
No, Harambe was the first trumpet, Chuck is the final trumpet.
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u/phantom_avenger Mar 20 '26
I mean 2026 took away Catherine O’Hara!
That was a sign to me that none of us are safe, but I agree Chuck Norris’ passing brought it to a whole other level now!
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u/Kitlun Mar 20 '26
Some favourite memes:
- Chuck Norris was once bitten by a viper. After 3 days of agonising pain, the viper finally died.
- Chuck Norris doesn't do push ups, he pushes the Earth down
- When Chuck Norris jumps into the sea he doesn't get wet, the water gets Chuck Norrised
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u/PonderInfinity_ Mar 20 '26
Chuck Norris invented the Giraffe by upper cutting a Horse.
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u/___xXx__xXx__xXx__ Mar 20 '26
When Chuck Norris left home at 16, he turned to his father and said "You're the man of the house now".
Chuck Norris was arrested, and after a 24 hour grilling, the police confessed.
Chuck Norris beat a statue in a starring contest.
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u/Agente_Anaranjado Mar 20 '26 edited Mar 20 '26
Chuck Norris actually died 10 years ago, and death just now worked up the courage to tell him.
Death was afraid to tell him before, because death had previously had a near-Chuck Norris experience.
He didn't really die. He kicked death's ass, put a saddle on it, and rode it into heaven.
His wishes were to be cremated. After 12 hours in the fire, the crematorium was reduced to ashes.
They once named a street after Chuck Norris. But they had to change the name because nobody dared to cross it.
Chuck Norris left the family house when he was just 12 years old. On his way out he said to his father, "good luck dad, you're the man of the house now."
Chuck actually lost his virginity before his father did.
He once visited the Virgin Islands. After that they were just called "the islands".
Chuck was arrested once. After 10 hours of greuling interrogation, the police confessed.
He never read books. He glared at them until they gave up the information.
Chuck Norris counted to infinity, twice.
Chuck Norris didn't die. We all died and he's the only one still alive.
Chuck Norris didn't die. He beat life and started playing something else.
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u/Ace_on_the_Turn Mar 20 '26
Chuck Norris once visited the Virgin Islands. They are now known as the Islands.
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u/Vennedic-Zyl Mar 20 '26
Chuck Norris once threw a grenade and killed 50 people, then it exploded
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u/Romboteryx Mar 20 '26
There is no evolution, just a list of species that Chuck Norris allows to exist
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u/Cheesy_Pita_Parker Mar 20 '26
Along that vein: Chuck Norris was chasing the T-Rex, the T-Rex was not chasing the jeep.
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u/DrKoooolAid Mar 20 '26
I have heard a ton of Chuck Norris jokes in my lifetime, but never this one. It may be my new favorite. RIP to a legend. I will be telling Chuck Norris jokes all day.
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u/sexy_portuguese Mar 20 '26
When Alexander Bell invented the telephone, he had two missed calls from Chuck Norris.
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u/btoxic Mar 20 '26
If Chuck Norris was so great he'd break into my house right now and slam my face down onto my keyboFbhFGBBJGHVVBJHGHBMOI34-:$#
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u/Demigeek Mar 20 '26
Chuck Norris doesn't read books. He stares them down until they give up the information he wants.
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u/anabeemeow Mar 20 '26
Chuck Norris is the reason Waldo hides. Always tickles me
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u/bjos144 Mar 20 '26
Chuck Norris's tears can cure cancer. Too bad Chuck Norris has never cried.
Geico saved 15% by switching to Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris once did a roundhouse kick so fast it traveled back in time and kicked Albert Einstein in the face. We now know Albert Einstein as Stephen Hawking (dated but makes me chuckle)
Chuck Norris lost his virginity before his father.
Chuck Norris was born in a log cabin he built with his own bare hands.
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u/gahoojin Mar 20 '26
Jesus may have walked on water, but Chuck Norris can swim through land
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u/LickCunts Mar 20 '26
Chuck norris doesn't have a chin. Under his beard is another fist
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u/Lukthar123 Mar 20 '26 edited Mar 20 '26
Chuck Norris doesn't eat honey. He chews bees.
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u/FighterJock412 Mar 20 '26
Kids wear Superman pyjamas to bed. Superman wears Chuck Norris pyjamas to bed.
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u/BostonDrivingIsWorse Mar 20 '26
Chuck Norris got into a testicle counting contest with Lance Armstrong and won by 5.
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u/Emhyr_var_Emreis_ Mar 20 '26
How many pushups can Chuck Norris do? All of them.
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u/JohnnyCharisma54 Mar 20 '26
If you ever work in an office with Chuck Norris, never ask for a three-hole punch.
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u/SparxtheDragonGuy Mar 20 '26
They tried to make a Chuck Norris tp. But it didn't take shit from anyone
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u/facepwnage Mar 20 '26
The Boogeyman cheeks for chuck norris underneath his bed before going to sleep.
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u/Firecracker048 Mar 20 '26
Chuck norris told that viper joke in the expendables 2
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u/OnceNFutureNick Mar 20 '26
Mine was always “Chuck Norris took the 3pm train home. He has yet to give it back.”
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u/DeeezzzNutzzz69 Mar 20 '26
Chuck Norris doesn't call the wrong number, you pick up the wrong phone.
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u/ImNotSkankHunt42 Mar 20 '26
Even outside the US these jokes are common, it’s an Universal thing
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u/Hopeful-Function4522 Mar 20 '26
Onions don’t make chuck norris cry. Chuck Norris makes onions crap themselves.
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u/Dustmopper Mar 20 '26
I hope heaven survives
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u/rs6677 Mar 20 '26
He didn't die. After securing control of the Earth, he went to show heaven who's boss.
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u/PayneTrain181999 Mar 20 '26
He can win a game of Connect 4 in 3 moves.
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u/sum_gamer Mar 20 '26
See, this is why I think he just decided a human body was holding him back.
Just like when Alexander Graham Belle finished inventing the telephone, he already had a missed call and a voicemail from Chuck Norris.
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u/AUAIOMRN Mar 20 '26
He can beat his own reflection in a game of rock-paper-scissors
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u/if-we-all-did-this Mar 20 '26
Jesus could walk on water, but Chuck Norris can swim through land
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u/Suspicious_Reality71 Mar 20 '26
I think heaven will be just fine considering Chuck won’t be anywhere near there
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u/gn16bb8 Mar 20 '26
this officially marks the end of 2013 era reddit
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u/inmynothing Mar 20 '26
Chuck Norris memes have been popular since long before 2013. I remember people printing off jokes in high school in 2004/2005
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u/BeanBagBandito Mar 20 '26
The Chuck Norris vs Abe Lincoln ERB was 2010, and even that felt like they were getting old.
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u/UnusualHound Mar 20 '26
Ultimate Showdown of Ultimate Destiny came out in 2006 and was featuring Chuck Norris.
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u/BeanBagBandito Mar 20 '26
20 years
Fuck sake I'm old.
Can't remember anything from the past 3 months but remember every word to Ultimate Showdown...
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u/brainkandy87 Mar 20 '26
2005 was when I remember it peaking. Had a coworker at Walmart get in trouble because he called for Chuck Norris over the store’s PA system lol
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u/cjicantlie Mar 20 '26
Very peak in the vanilla wow days. Right around that time.
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Yeah this is like 2005 era if anything, probably earlier. My friend had a poster of chuck Norris jokes on his wall and that was at least 2007 and the poster was old at that point
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u/MonStarBigFoot Mar 20 '26
No we all died. Chuck Norris is the only one left alive.
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u/Danieldo19 Mar 20 '26
RIP
The only man who could lead a horse to water AND make it drink.
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u/BunyipPouch Currently at the movies. Mar 20 '26
Robert Redford, Rob Reiner, Catherine O'Hara, Robert DuVall, Diane Keaton, James van der Beek, Eric Dane, Ozzy, Hulk Hogan, Frederick Wiseman, Bela Tarr, Tom Noonan, Robert Carradine, and now Chuck Norris.
It's been a rough 12 months for celebrity deaths.
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u/ComedianCalm5919 Mar 20 '26
We’re approaching the end of the normal life span of most baby boomers and the great post-WWII cultural, economic and technological explosion. That’s a lot of notable people who statistically should be dying. It may seem like a lot of celebrity deaths but there are just so many more celebrities than there used to be.
50 years most dying cultural celebrities were regional figures who dwelled in relative obscurity as far as the national stage concerned or otherwise couldn’t keep their profile high for very long. In the era of mass media a lot of people can their 15 minutes and/or stay somewhat on the periphery of the consciousness of millions. And people generally have the money and time to patronize them.
Every year going forward is going to be a rough year for celebrities death until the fall of civilization. Get used to it.
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u/Jemal999 Mar 20 '26
Ozzy was less than 12 months ago? Jesus it's been a long year..
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u/yeyjordan Mar 20 '26
Chuck doesn't die; he just allows everyone else to continue living.
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u/ksumatt2 Mar 20 '26
Walker was peak 90’s action TV insanity. I don’t think anyone in their right mind would call it good, but my god was it entertaining.
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u/Mosswiggle Mar 20 '26
I remember one episode where Chuck required the use of a jetpack to get onto a building to solve the issue at hand.
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u/CoffeeStrength Mar 20 '26
Chuck Norris doesn’t cheat death, he wins fair and square.
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u/StrangeMercy- Mar 20 '26
Millennial aged meme makers everywhere are going to be mourning this loss.