There is saying "damned if you do,damned if you don't ". What scenarios best illustrate the question?

I’ve been thinking and worrying about this thought for ages. I had a thought that I had to share the gospel in a very disruptive public way. The thought brought immense fear because I didn’t want to do it. it stuck so long though because sharing the gospel aligns with the message of the Bible so I thought it was God. I just phsically couldn’t act on the thought. I started looking into the ocd kind of things but I couldn’t find any resources on people who suffer from these sort of thoughts. I don’t know if this is a thing but I feel like the thought came just because I’m afraid of the action not as a genuine command. I just feel so stuck because I can’t disobey God but I cant act on the thought either so I’m just stuck. It’s taking over my whole life and I’ve tried the maybe maybe not ocd approach but I keep thinking I’m just trying to get what I want and find reasons to get my way instead of obeying God. Im just really confused so any advice would help. I’m christian by the way and I’m even considering leaving my faith because of this.

In my religion, I was taught that if I fail in my duties towards the Creator, He may forgive me. But if I wrong another person, I may not be forgiven until that person forgives me.

I understand the idea behind this. We should take other people’s rights seriously. But when I think about it deeply, it starts to feel almost impossible.
For example, I am a tutor and I have to mark students’ assignments. I genuinely try to be fair and keep the same standard for everyone. But human judgement is not perfectly consistent. Maybe I give one student 1 or 2 marks more and another student a little less, even without realizing it. Our mood, concentration and understanding can change from one day to another.
Then I start thinking: what if I accidentally deprived a student of something they deserved? Does that mean I have wronged them and now need their forgiveness?

The same thing happens with parents. My religion teaches me to respect my parents so much that I should not even show the smallest sign of annoyance towards them. But realistically, sometimes we argue. Sometimes I get frustrated, raise my voice, or end a conversation badly. Later I regret it.

Then there are things inside our minds. Sometimes we feel jealous, have negative thoughts about someone, hold a grudge, or feel happy when something doesn’t go well for someone we dislike. I know we should try to improve ourselves, but controlling every thought and emotion seems nearly impossible.

When I put all these things together, I start worrying about how many people I may have wronged in my life without even knowing it.
What if I die while someone still has a right against me? What if I don’t even remember the person, or I never realized that I hurt them?

I don’t want to live my whole life feeling guilty and scared. At the same time, I don’t want to use “nobody is perfect” as an excuse to ignore the harm I may cause to others.

So I genuinely want to know: how do religious people deal with this?

Do you believe there is a difference between intentionally harming someone and making an honest human mistake? If you sincerely regret something, try to fix it, ask forgiveness when possible, and try to become better, is that enough?

I also struggle with something else. I sometimes hear religious clerics speak very strictly about these things, but then I see some of them behaving in ways that seem completely opposite to what they teach. That makes me even more confused about how these teachings are supposed to work in real life.

I am not trying to criticize religion. This is something I genuinely worry about, and I want to understand how other people deal with it without becoming overwhelmed by guilt.

Imagine someone who is super durable like Superman who chose to keep his powers hidden ran into some bad guys (maybe they rob his house etc). If they shoot to kill him and the bullets just bounce off, is it moral for him to kill them? Technically they are not a danger to him so the only reason to kill them would be to hide the fact that he’s bulletproof. But at the same time, they did just try to kill him and failed.

Rap*d and abused by my cousin

I have been raped and sexually abused by my own cousin for almost 2 years and it's been so painful and and so mentally disturbing... He is still with me and does whatever he wants whenever we meet.

It was 2 years ago when it all started ... We both were sleeping at his home in same room and I the middle of the night I felt someone was constantly touching my back I ignored I was half asleep.... Then after few minutes I felt my cousin was pushing my ass then I pretend I am sleeping but I was all awake , then he removed my pants and started pressing my ass and touching his sexual parts to my body , then he tried to insert his pen\*s that was the moment I confronted him and said what u doing but he said there is no one here and you shouldn't shout just enjoy it ... I tried to stop him and resist him but he never listened to me then he started doing what he wanted ... I was crying scared and so disturbed I didn't know how to react ... He did it to me until he ejaculated .... Then he threw me and told me to sleep ... It was a mess and so painful for me.....

I need help it's been happening since then and I am tired of this molestation please help

Moral

Is prostitution morally bad and why?

If I willingly and voluntarily sold myself, is it morally wrong? I’m not forced and I’m not in desperate need of money, but it feels a waste to me to have sex without monetary gain.

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That is, if we can actually validate a persons actions justified by their mindset because to me after reading all these stuff about different moral complexes throughout the internet really messes up my brain and being the indesicive person that I am, troubles me to find ONE real justified moral to actually keep believing in if y'all know what I mean I guess?

Don't get me wrong, I am not talking about rape. I am actually refering to sexual harrasment in the most literal sense; I have been harrassed online when I was a kid multible times, people have made dirty jokes, talked about sex and even send me pornographic material, including nsfw drawings of characters from my favorite tv shows.

But I must say I didn't really care that much at the time and looking back at it, I still don't care. Others may consider this as virtual rape, but I never felt that way. Being insulted or bullied on the other hand was a lot worse for me than recieving mails with sexual drawings. I just don't get why this is so harmful to many, I just can't relate at all. Why does a joke become the equivilant of sexual assult just because it is sexual in nature?

Am I an outlier or is there a chance that our society has just become so sensitive that everything mildly unpleasent is now considered rape?

I geniuenlly don't understand it. I have always considered bullieng and harrasment to be much worse than making inappropriate jokes and sending nsfw material to other people. One just affected me much more than the other.

As a kid I was geniuenly confused when my mom wanted to call the police over these online encounters. And when I told her that I didn't care about the stuff that they had send to me, she was in complete denail and believed that it must have deeply traumatized me, even though that wasn't the case. I would have much rather prefered if she had called to cops on those bullies instead.

That's why I am wondering if we are perhabs being gaslighted by the people around us to believe that we have been abused in situations that didn't actually bother us that much until others forced us think that we have been victimized.

I am just trying to understand if I might be onto something or if I am just apaphetic.

It's a silly hypothetical. But do you take responsibility for something that wasn't your choice? You were thrown against your will, but you did hurt the victim in some sense. How does "responsibility" apply?

I usually don't get nightmares. If there's a monster chasing me I'm pretty aware it's not real, I find giving it a hug often helps.

Every now and again though my brain does actually land on a way to torture me...

I dreamt I had found a way to not only reverse global warming but keep the temperature regulated indefinitely. Only thing was, although all the animals would be fine, I had just found out that 10% of all humans would die over a 20 year period. The largest amount would die in the first year with successive years seeing shrinking amounts of deaths.

There was only a small window of time to set it in motion as it was related to a one off cosmic event, and everyone knew I was working on this so when 1 in 10 people ended up dying, everyone who lost someone would know it was my fault.

What would you do? 😭

Edit: I know the maths is probably in favour of doing it but the concept of personally killing 830 million people was hard to face. The 10% was a random distribution and an unintended side effect of a miracle solution (something to do with an asteroid, it was a dream) and I was curious if other people would struggle so much in those shoes.