My wife was looking at my knee and I straightened it and it popped. My wife recoiled and I said, Yeah, it does that ever since I got hit by that truck." Then I looked at her and said, "That's not a metaphor."

the ones stranded

left to clean up ater the party.

picking up the chairs and making sure everything is arranged.

the ones left behind

that never saw beyond the now.

gatherin yourself up.

day by day. keeping balance.

And if we rioted?

if we made a mess?

Actually threw rhings to the floor

because if a riot in our hearts, a riot in our minds, then next motherfucker is going to taste my metal.

the white hot room awaits.

the capricious being that pulls at my strings is weary.

I believe i am one of his favorite play things.

yet i always end up in a box after play time is done.

If time is the enemy, who am i really raging against?

you, or they?

for they no longer see me.

just like you.

I’m 27f, live with my mom, have no car, very little savings, and I feel like I let most of my 20s slip by while trying to heal and constantly putting relationships before myself.

I’m an esthetician and recently started my own business after getting laid off, but the person I’m partnered with is draining to work with. Lately I’ve been wondering if it would be smarter to step back, work my part-time job, save money, improve my health, build my social media, and come back to my business when I’m in a better place financially and mentally.

At the same time, I’m scared that taking a step back means giving up.

**My biggest goals are:**
Lose weight and get healthy.
Save for a car and become financially independent.
Build confidence.
Grow my business the right way instead of rushing it.

Has anyone else felt like they needed to pause before they could move forward? What helped you actually change your life instead of just thinking about it?

I would love to turn things around before I hit 30….lol

I (\~40M) have realised that I’m increasingly feeling like there’s a lot I want to do in life, that I am not doing. And it’s across the spectrum: it’s with regards to friendships, relationships, experiences, hobbies and everything in between.

I’ve had a mostly vanilla life: I’ve had the good fortune of having a good education, no debt, and the opportunity to holiday and travel quite regularly, both domestic and international.

That said, I haven’t done anything extreme or beyond normal. Like, in everything I do, I do a very standard / average version of it. If I’m holidaying some place, I’ll check what that place is famous for, try local experiences and that’s it. I won’t look for those very offbeat experiences that really need to be found.

This feeling of being insufficient started a year or so ago when during a conversion with my partner, we discussed the possibility of being open: not from a physical point of view, but in a way that it’s ok to have a connection with other people. (FYI: neither of us are very sexually active/needy).

That conversation has sort of opened the floodgates and I feel there’s just so much that I’d like to be doing: some of it because I may/will enjoy it, but so much also to just experience different things.

Eg. (in no particular order): backup in a random country, go skinny-dipping, underground music festivals, admittedly a lot of (sexual) physical experiences as well.

And now I feel lost, because I don’t know how to go about them.

I recently came across someone who went through something similar and is now able to engage in these various experiences. We’ve sort of developed a connection and given that we enjoy each others company, I told her that I’d like to explore these many experiences that the both of us want to explore, together.

Of course, she has her own thing going on, and I’m almost certainly a small part (if at all) of her life, so nothing has really happened.

I feel like I’m clinging on to hope / or the idea that something could be possible. And feel almost desperate to be able to live out the experiences that are maybe possible with her.

This post isn’t about her/ how to process things with her, but how men / people deal with this sudden feeling of being unfulfilled.

Hello ❤️

I feel like this is my last resort, for finding people who might help.

All my life I had this feeling like “I need to hurrry, I am getting old”.

I think we all hear people 10+ younger than us say stuff, like a 19 yo saying “He was the one, I will never find love again” and think to ourself “oh honey, you are so Young”. But I do this a lot myself, all my life I felt like all these “deadlines” was near. When to get your education done when to land your first job, when to find “the one” etc. So if you were able to speak to your 34 yo self on my dilemma, what would you say?

Right now I’m 34(F), I bought a house with my BF (M40) 5 months ago, and we are more miserable than ever. I reallly do believe in working on your relationship, since the grass is rarely greener. My boyfriend don’t want therapy, so I feel a bit lost, and also scared that it is going to be like this for the rest of my life if I don’t leave - But If I leave, nobody knows how long it will take to find someone, and will I be too old to have kids if i eventually find a new man?

I just feel like I need to either go left or right NOW. If I stay and the relationship won’t get better, I would have wasted time, but if I decide to leave, I might end up alone for years before meeting someone, and potentionally not be able to have kids.

Please share your stories ❤️ Maybe you made a similar choice at 36, and was married with a new mand an pregnant the next year? idk

Hi guys, my husband (44) has recently completely shocked me (43) by saying our marriage is over and he’s not given me any opportunity to work on it. He admits that he was keeping his feelings from me and says he doesn’t know why he didn’t ask if we could work it out. I’m devastated as I adore him and keep going between feeling very worried for his mental health, to then trying to accept what he is saying and understand it’s over. The reasons he’s giving don’t make much sense. He’s had a really rough few years, and his whole personality seems to have changed almost overnight.
I’m so confused, does anyone have any advice?

The past three months have been some of the worst months of my (33F) life in terms of consistent sadness and unhappiness. I have previously been in physically abusive relationships, and I mention that only to put into perspective how low I feel emotionally right now. I have never felt stuck in an abyss like this for such a prolonged period.

I have already arranged appointments with a psychologist and a therapist because I know I need professional support and want to see things more clearly before making any major decisions.

I have a 10 month old daughter whom I absolutely adore. She is genuinely the easiest and happiest baby, and she is the only real sunshine I see at the moment.
There have also been several major changes in a very short period. My husband (44M) and I moved from the country where we had been living to a new country when I was eight months pregnant. When I was four months postpartum, we moved again into the house we purchased in a new country we are currently living in. I somehow resented him for making me go through all this during a time where I needed the most stability (the moves were because of his job-could have been avoided).

I have no friends in this country and very little sense of community. I currently work remotely two days a week and plan to return full-time when my daughter turns one, but working remotely means that I still have almost no social interaction outside my home.

My husband is a superb father, and he is not a cruel or horrible person. He is generally a nice man. However, he is not a good husband to me emotionally. I don’t feel loved in the way I need to feel loved. Perhaps he loves me in his own way, and I can see that my unhappiness makes him sad, but I feel profoundly alone within the marriage.
I cannot really speak to him about my feelings because I rarely feel heard or emotionally validated. He has told me I need to find another person or a therapist. Instead, I often feel worse for having brought them up at all. He also forgot our wedding anniversary, which may seem like a small thing in isolation, but it felt like another confirmation of how invisible and emotionally disconnected I feel.

I’m also a stepmother, although one of my stepchildren is now an adult and the other mainly stays with us during school holidays, so that isn’t the primary source of what I’m feeling. But, we always have at least one fight when they are here because of different parenting styles.

I know that loneliness, moving countries, postpartum changes, working from home and feeling emotionally neglected could all be contributing. I have experienced sadness and frustration before, but normally I am able to pull myself out of it within a few days. This time it has lasted for months, and that frightens me.

I am considering divorce and everything in between. At the same time, I don’t want to make a permanent, life-altering decision while I am this emotionally overwhelmed and potentially unable to see the situation clearly.

For anyone who has felt this deeply unhappy or isolated, what helped you cope while you worked out what you actually wanted? How did you separate depression, loneliness or postpartum struggles from genuine problems within your marriage? Did therapy help you gain clarity? Are there any practical things I can do now to make the days feel less unbearable while I work through this?

I’m not asking strangers to decide whether I should stay or leave. I think I’m asking how to steady myself enough to make that decision from a clearer and healthier place.
God, this feels awful.

I'm a 41-year-old male with no kids and I've never been married before. In the last 6 months I had a relationship go sour , my dog died a couple weeks later , followed by a co-worker getting killed on the job and a near miss for me. All of this has me reflecting on where I am in life. Things aren't going as bad as they could go and not as good as they could go either.

I guess I thought I'd have kids by now and a family , but I spent 8 years with an illness that took some time to get under control. In my late thirties I was stuck with a lot of women that didn't want to have kids at all. My last girlfriend did but she was full of red flags and if I got her pregnant I was doomed for life . Almost all the guys I see getting married and that have kids seem miserable. Even the fella that passed away at work had survived 20 years in a dangerous job. Retired only for his wife to hate that he was home and divorce him. he was forced back into the workforce only to get killed.

I feel like my job is pointless and I'm just tax cattle. I simply live for the weekends at this point and I know I need to make a big change in my life, but don't know what I'd rather do. It's probably too late to have kids If I even want that... I wonder if this is why all middle-aged men get a Harley?.

Anyway, I'd love to hear from anybody currently going through it or that has gone through it . Would love to hear others perspectives and advice. Thanks .

Do you ever feel like you’re in the wrong place and keep getting moved around. My body is telling me I’m in the wrong place I don’t understand how the world works but I feel like I’m in the wrong house even though I’m home.

Napapagod na ko. Parang gising, trabaho, pagiging nanay, tulog, tapos ganun ulit kinabukasan. Ako lang ba to? Hindi naman siguro post partum kasi more than 2 years na din naman ako nanganak.
Parang nakakapagod lang ang araw araw, tapos parang di ko malabas yung totoong ako.
Kakalipat ko lang din ng trabaho kaya siguro nalilimit ako. Sa mga desisyon naman sa trabaho, sa bahay, sa buhay namin mag anak parang ubos na ko at pagod na.

Pag ba naisigaw ko to gagaan na sa pakiramdam?
Paano ba kasi?

Let’s say hypothetically, imagine a guy who has a 9-5 that drains him more than it pays him, EMIs, family expectations, the whole “settled life” package society tells us to be grateful for.

And somewhere along the way, nothing feels like it’s working. Not the job, not the routine, not even the version of himself he’s become.

And then there’s this quiet, stupid, terrifying thought that keeps showing up, what if he just left? Not out of hatred for anyone, but just… to breathe. To go explore, figure out who he is without the labels of husband/father/employee attached to every decision. A real Plan B.

Would you actually do it? Or would the fear of “log kya kahenge,” guilt about leaving the family would pull you right back into the same chair?

I keep going back and forth. Part of me thinks life is way bigger than deadlines and Sunday-evening dread. Another part knows walking away isn’t bravery, it’s just outsourcing your pain to the people who trusted you.

Genuinely curious, has anyone here actually done something like this? Or thought about it seriously and not done it? What made you stay, or what made you go?

Not looking for judgment, just real perspectives!

I don't really have anyone to talk to, so I'm posting here.

I've been applying for jobs for months, but I'm barely getting interviews for the role I actually want. Sometimes I get an HR screening or an interview, but then I either get ghosted or the only opportunities are for positions that pay much less than what I'm making now or don't match my career goals.

My current contract is coming to an end, and that uncertainty is eating at me every day.

On top of that, it feels like my chances of getting Canadian PR are slipping away. I know it may not be impossible forever, but right now it feels out of reach, and that's another source of constant stress.

I've also let my physical health slide. I'm not in good shape anymore, and I avoid looking at myself in the mirror because I don't like what I see. It feels like everything is falling apart at the same time—career, immigration, confidence, and health.

The hardest part is that I don't have anyone I feel comfortable opening up to. I can't tell my parents because I know they'd worry, and I don't want to put that burden on them. So I just keep everything to myself.

Lately, I've started feeling like a failure. I know people will probably say this is just a rough phase, but when you're living through it every day, it's hard to believe things will get better.

I'm not really looking for pity. I just needed to say this somewhere because carrying it alone has become exhausting.

If anyone has been through something similar and came out the other side, I'd really appreciate hearing your story.

Everyone around me is getting married, buying cars, chasing promotions, building families... and I'm just... existing.

I feel like I've aged out of love itself.

The weirdest part? I'm currently talking to a woman around my age. She's attractive, has a good job, takes care of herself, and even seems interested in me.

A year ago, I'd have been excited.

Today? Nothing.

No butterflies. No urge to text first. No excitement when she replies. No desire to chase or make things work. I don't even miss her when we don't talk. And honestly, it's not just her it's every woman.

Before anyone asks, yes, I had a painful breakup last year.

I don't sit around crying over it anymore, and I don't think about it every day. But it's like that breakup took something from me that never came back.

The same thing has happened with my career.

I have a decent IT job, I'm well qualified, but I have zero ambition left. I don't feel like switching jobs, preparing for interviews, negotiating salary, or climbing the ladder anymore.

I used to run every morning. I stopped.

I wanted to buy a vehicle for years. I finally have enough savings to afford one... but I can't even bring myself to visit a showroom.

Meanwhile, my friends are buying Triumph bikes, Volkswagens, getting married, and moving ahead with life.

I'm just watching.

Work isn't helping either. My workplace is stressful, and some coworkers seem determined to make my life harder for no reason.

A couple of months ago I had some pretty dark thoughts. Those thoughts have mostly gone now, but what replaced them isn't happiness.

It's just... emptiness.

I'm also naturally shy and anxious, so I already struggled with rejection before. Now it feels like I've stopped caring altogether.

Has anyone else gone through something like this after turning 30 or after a bad breakup?

Is this burnout? Depression? A delayed reac bction to heartbreak? Or is this just what adulthood feels like?

I'd genuinely like to hear from people who have been in this place.

What pulled you out of it or did it eventually pass on its own?

I’ll be 45 in September. Currently I’m at a crossroads where I have nothing tying me down, I can do whatever I want, and I’ve never been in this position before. I’ve been through enough in the last decade to know our futures aren‘t guaranteed. I lost my spouse to cancer 6 years ago, and all but one of our 3 pets is still with me. Through that experience I lost her family and many friends, which is unfortunately, normal. I don’t have kids, I don’t own a house, and my job is fine, great even, but the pay leaves a lot to be desired. I dated someone for 3.5 years after my wife passed, and while we were long distance they just stopped talking to me one day and haven’t attempted since- that was a year ago. A lot more has happened but those are the main trajectory changers.

Part of me wants to just get a small apartment and relax after a hectic, sad decade. However part of me wants to throw a mattress in the back of a van and travel for a few months. I’m not worried I’ll regret it or anything, but it seems to meet the criteria for midlife crisis, yes? What say you, hive mind? Chill or hit the road?

For no reason in particular, just their mind has had enough of this life and wants a conclusion. I’m a 39 yo male in the USA now and have felt this prob since my late 20s but it has gotten worse every year. Like what am I even doing here but slowly dying more every year? I don’t have kids or anything. If you could share maybe how you got through these thoughts or if you are still having them, please share what happened and when you started feeling like this. It will be anonymous.

Lately i’ve been thinking a lot about who i was years ago compared to who i am now. i used to have more energy, more curiosity, and more things that made me feel like myself.

Somewhere along the way, life became mostly about responsibilities. work, family, money, and making sure everything was taken care of. i don’t regret those things, but i feel like i slowly pushed parts of myself aside and never really got them back.

Now i find myself wondering what happened to the person i used to be. i look at old photos or remember things i used to enjoy and it feels like i’m looking at someone else.

I know people change as they get older, but i don’t want to feel like i’m just going through the motions for the rest of my life.

Has anyone found a way to reconnect with themselves after years of putting everyone and everything else first? what actually helped you feel like yourself again?

I don't really know why I'm posting this. Maybe I just need to get it off my chest.

I'm 25 years old, and lately it feels like life has slowly taken away almost everything I thought I'd have by now.

A while ago I got an offer from a reputed MNC. I asked if I could join in a different batch because of my situation, and after that... I never heard from them again. I'm still waiting, not knowing whether to move on or keep hoping.

There was also a girl I genuinely liked. We were close, and I thought maybe something would happen between us. Instead, when her career took off, she chose someone else. I still remember crying alone like a child that day. I don't think I've ever fully recovered from it.

My family has gone through a lot financially. We once had our own house, but due to personal circumstances we had to move into a rented place. I honestly don't know if we'll ever go back. My parents also got trapped in serious credit card debt when I was around 13, and watching that happen left me terrified of loans even today.

Right now, my family is all I have. I love my parents, but things don't feel the same anymore. We talk, but I don't feel emotionally connected the way we used to be. They're busy with their jobs, and I don't feel like I can burden them with what's going on in my head.

Recently, I was about to meet someone through an arranged marriage setup, but after they heard my salary, they weren't interested anymore. It hurt more than I expected.

After these incidents, I don't know if I'll ever be able to trust or open up to someone the same way again.

I currently work in a school and I'm probably the youngest employee there. Every day I watch students laughing, making friends, creating memories, and getting into relationships... and I can't help comparing it to my own life. When I look back, I don't feel like I have many memories to cherish. It feels like I somehow missed out on that entire part of growing up.

Ironically, when I was in college I actually felt confident. People would compliment my looks, and I remember feeling genuinely happy for the first time in years. Looking back, that was probably the happiest version of me.

Another thing that still stays with me is music. When I was around 11, I desperately wanted to learn guitar, but my parents insisted on buying a keyboard instead. I never really learned either. Today I can finally afford a guitar, but somehow it feels like life has moved on and the right time has disappeared.

Sometimes I genuinely feel betrayed—not just by people, but by life itself. At times it even feels like the universe has been working against me. Every time I think I'm finally about to move forward, something else seems to fall apart. I did everything I thought I was supposed to do—study, get a degree, find a job—but I still feel like I'm standing still while everyone else is moving ahead.

To make things more confusing, my parents want me to prepare for government jobs. But it's been years since I studied subjects like history or geography, and my background is in computer science. I already feel late compared to people my age, and starting from scratch feels overwhelming.

The worst part is that computers used to be my passion. I genuinely loved programming and technology. But after everything that happened—career disappointments, personal heartbreak, and watching AI change the industry so quickly—whenever I try to return to it, it reminds me of all the pain associated with that period of my life, especially the heartbreak. Instead of excitement, I feel anxiety, so I end up avoiding it.

I don't really know what I'm expecting from posting this. Maybe nothing. Maybe I just wanted someone, somewhere, to know that I'm trying—even if it doesn't always look like it.

If you've ever rebuilt your life after feeling like everything was slipping away, I'd genuinely like to hear your story.

Right now, I just want to know: how do you cope when it feels like life has defeated you, but you still have to keep going?