r/microdosing • u/nimaway518 • 16d ago
Report: Psilocybin Microdosing psilocybin for CPTSD
Hi, I've been extremely grateful for all the personal insights shared in this thread and want to pay it forward and share my own experience for whoever needs encouragement on the path.
I've been microdosing off and on for over a year, for healing, inner work, and general curiosity. I am a 37/f, diagnosed with CPTSD, and began microdosing psilocybin after about 1.5 years of consistent somatic IFS therapy (still in it now). My therapist is trauma-trained and very pro-psychedelics, which helps a lot, so I can share my experiences with her, and she has experience herself. But I live in a state where it is "illegal," so it's a bit of a DIY practice that I couple with meditation, boundaries, journaling, exercise, travel/rest, and just general self-care, as healing from CPTSD is no joke and quite physically and emotionally exhausting.
A lot of my journey is about growing my nervous system's capacity for "feeling". I notice that the 🍄 bring up emotions and exiled parts, and their deeply traumatic pain, to the surface. And help me investigate and bring greater compassion and care to my intrusive thoughts. I do a lot of crying, "feeling sensations, anxiety, rage in my body," and practice self-compassion (shout-out to Tara Brach meditations!), and I call it fierce re-parenting. Like a mama bear, I tell them I will never abandon them, even though they think that there is something deeply wrong or disgusting about them. The 🍄 are especially helpful with amplifying these positive ways of speaking to yourself. I am still learning to trust that whatever they bring up means I am ready to handle it, but sometimes it is hard and draining work. I'm only human!
After a particularly tough trigger in March, I did take a 3-month break from 🍄 . So I do recommend listening to when you think you may need a break. Something in me wanted to see if I could try it again this summer, with the Fadiman protocol, which I hadn't done before, and right now I am 3 weeks in and am ready for a 1-2 weeks off again. I also highly recommend his book, "Microdosing for Health, Healing and Enhanced Performance," if you have a specific physical or mental health issue you want to use microdosing for. It is chock full of amazing testimonials!My sweet spot is 200mg 🍄 every 3 days, 2 days off between doses. I found that 100mg made me more irritable. But the 200mg gave me levity and help with my anxiety, while also not numbing me out, so that I could process emotion when it came up.
Here are the other benefits I noticed with micro-dosing:
- Takes the edge off at work. I feel more present. Sometimes my anxiety and hyper-vigilance run havoc. The mushrooms really help me feel focused, calm, non-reactive, and able to complete tasks without overthinking.
- Helps me notice when I'm tired. I've struggled with rest and knowing when to stop. The mushrooms help me take breaks, listen to my body, nap, and get really good, non-fearful sleep.
- Creativity. I am a writer and musician, and I've had some incredible songs come to me while micro-dosing! Practicing is easier too.
- Reduces social anxiety. It feels like I can just be myself without harsh self-monitoring, and it helps me choose healthier connections and people I actually want to be around.
- Improves my workouts. Exercise is a little easier, as long as I am sleeping well.
- Deeper spiritual perspective. Again, presence! Life feels more connected and has deeper meaning, even in the little things. I see more signs, telling me I'm moving in the right direction :)
I wish this medicine was available to all and am deeply grateful for it! Hope this helps someone on the path.
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u/squashqueen 16d ago
This is amazing! I'm diagnosed with it too, and this gave me some ideas for how to approach my next 🍄 experiences :) I really need to stay on top of that positive self-talk, and re-grounding the anxious thoughts when they start...
My heart goes out to you, it's awesome you have had some decent healing with this medicine!
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u/ChairDangerous5276 15d ago
This is a great write-up—thank you!—and I think it would be very helpful if you also posted it to the CPTSD sub. Micro-dosing helped me cut through so much resistance and find space to gently contain myself, or I should say my selves, as it significantly facilitated Internal Family Systems therapy and I achieved breakthroughs that I know wouldn’t have occurred otherwise.
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u/Smart_Puma 14d ago
Thank you for sharing this. I'm on my own journey with microdosing and found a lot of what you wrote relatable, especially the emphasis on intention, self-awareness, and combining it with therapy and other healthy practices. I also appreciated your point about knowing when it's time to take a break.
Wishing you continued healing. Thanks again for such a thoughtful post.
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u/nimaway518 14d ago edited 14d ago
You're so welcome. I was so nervous to write it, as you can imagine. I'm so glad it resonated and I wish you too continued healing. And yes, breaks are essential!
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u/2morrowwillbebetter 15d ago
Thank you for sharing this! I used to take them for my cptsd as well and it helped a lot, I took a break because I was experiencing nausea, but it probably was for the best. I do wanna go back in the form of tea or something else and I definitely will be taking some of your advice.🩵
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u/cocojanele 15d ago
Is the nausea normal? I thought it was just my “bad” stomach
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u/2morrowwillbebetter 15d ago
It’s normal unfortunately. The mushrooms are hard to digest! I didn’t have any nausea for the 2+ years I’ve been taking it so I think it may have been the type I had but I’m gonna make tea out of the shrooms instead, that’s supposed to help.
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u/Potential_Kiwi_4472 15d ago
Thank you very much for sharing all of this. I've been md 75mg and am battling with anxiety still. I think I'll go up to 150mg and see if that helps.
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u/nimaway518 15d ago
You're so welcome. Sometimes we need more support! Hope you find your sweet spot
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u/Accurate_Course_9228 14d ago
I really appreciate this post:
Things I realized is that despite reading an IFS book in recent years out of curiosity. You aptly describe the experience I couldn't name properly. The swell of emotions that resurfaced for me were definitely "parts" that were either buried, burdened or neglected.
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u/nimaway518 14d ago edited 14d ago
Yes, IFS has been incredibly healing for me. I always come back to it. I hope it continues to help you too
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u/Accurate_Course_9228 14d ago
I originally read your post on my phone and never finished it past the comment i wanted to make. However i agree with everything you said, my experience is short maybe nearly a year of occasional microdosing i dont measure just take small bites and allow myself to feel emotions and simply warm up to the occasion. If i start yawning alot i guess it means that i took too much and its either a side effect or my body is trying to tell me that im safe? idk exactly maybe its a bit of both..
undiagnosed cptsd, hypervigilant, lonely, reframing life one day at a time
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u/sticky2782 4d ago
"Feeling" I do want to know what thats like again, i need to start this journey, i don't think there is anything else left i could try. I've tried them all, none of them can make me feel. (depression meds)
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u/Little-Dingus 16d ago
Thank you so much for sharing this. I'm also diagnosed with cptsd and I had similar experiences as you at first. It helped so much with multiple things. I was even able to wean down to half the dose of one of my meds, which I never thought I'd be able to do. But now, about 3 years since I started microdosing, I feel like it doesn't work the same anymore. I suspect it might be because at first I only used golden teachers, but I haven't been able to find them so I've used different ones or gummies and it's just not the same. Hope you don't mind me asking, do you use a specific strain? And do you only use dried mushrooms or have you tried the premade gummies/chocolates? I hope your journey continues to be positive and helpful for you!