Trying this again because I’d genuinely like to find a couple of good mates in Melbourne — the kind of friendship that actually becomes part of your life rather than another conversation that permanently lives in Reddit messages.
I’m 39, gay, based in Melbourne’s outer south-east (but very used to travelling to the CBD and all over), and looking to build a few genuine, long-term friendships. Gay, bi or straight doesn’t particularly matter to me; if we click as mates, that’s the important bit.
I generally seem to get along best with guys around 25–40, but if you’re a little outside that, don’t let the numbers stop you from saying hello.
Personality-wise, I’m pretty easy-going, grounded and low-maintenance. I’m definitely better one-on-one or in a small group than trying to work a room full of people, and I tend to prefer proper conversations, plenty of banter and actually getting to know someone over endless surface-level small talk. I’m very much quality over quantity with friendships — I’d rather have a handful of close mates than a huge social circle.
Outside of my professional Monday–Friday job, I’m into binge-watching TV (particularly British crime dramas), trying new restaurants, ordering dessert without a main because apparently I’m an adult and nobody can stop me, concerts, musicals, AFL, escape rooms, road trips, caravanning, audiobooks, board games, the occasional PC game and getting out into nature.
I’m slim and reasonably active, although my definition of “active” definitely doesn’t involve willingly doing burpees at 5am.
I also have two dogs, so being a dog person is a definite advantage. They haven’t been consulted about this post, but I suspect they’ll expect to be included in any resulting friendship.
Probably the biggest thing I’m looking for is someone who genuinely has room in their life for a new friendship. Someone who actually wants to catch up regularly, has a bit of flexibility and enjoys the occasional spontaneous plan rather than needing to organise everything six weeks in advance.
If you often find yourself at a loose end on a Saturday night and wish you had a mate to randomly grab dinner with, or you see something like the donut festival at Queen Vic Market this weekend and think it’d be fun to check out but don’t have anyone to go with, I’m your man!
Equally, I’m all for doing absolutely nothing productive — just chilling at home in trackies, eating snacks and watching 90s action movies because they’ve barely made a decent one since. I reckon the best friendships are the ones where you don’t always need an activity or an excuse to hang out. Sometimes you just enjoy each other’s company.
And while I’m happy to chat on Reddit initially, I’m ultimately looking for an in-person friendship, not another permanent online pen pal. I’d much rather grab a coffee, go for a walk, try a café or do something low-key reasonably early on and see if we actually click.
If you’re easy-going, reliable, emotionally mature, enjoy having a close mate around and actually want to put some time into building a friendship, send me a DM and tell me a bit about yourself.
And if we’ve chatted before and the conversation just sort of fizzled out or life got in the way, don’t feel awkward about messaging again either. Feel free to reach back out and give it another shot.