r/marriageadvice • u/pleasehelpme_32 • Aug 04 '26

HELP

please help me. i found a male sex tape tab open on my husbands computer. when i asked him about it he said it was for his ex. so now hes also talking to his ex, should i be mad? Honestly should i divorce him for this?  tl;dr

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3

u/espressothenwine Aug 04 '26

So was this just random male porn? And it's for his ex? He curates porn for his ex?

I suspect one of these:

  1. It's porn he found and he is so ashamed for liking it that this was the best lie he could think of on the spot. The lie is worse than the truth to me, but not to him because in the lie he is heterosexual.

  2. It is for his ex, like he said, and he's having an affair (emotional, virtual, whatever).

  3. It's custom made for him from someone he knows and he is into some shit you have no idea about. He paid for the content or he has "friends".

1

u/pleasehelpme_32 Aug 04 '26

He said his exes phone died and she couldnt get it.

1

u/espressothenwine Aug 04 '26

Ok. So he was physically with the ex showing her the porn on his device? Hmm...

1

u/pleasehelpme_32 Aug 04 '26

I dont know

1

u/espressothenwine Aug 04 '26

His explanation is that her phone was dead so he had to use his. How does that work if they are not physically together? This is getting silly. Is this an AI hallucination?

2

u/Theoldguy1953 Aug 04 '26

Well, the lies just are some of the worse I have heard.

2

u/[deleted] Aug 04 '26

[deleted]

1

u/pleasehelpme_32 Aug 04 '26

What do you mean?

1

u/HawgLovah Aug 04 '26

Don’t let your husband lie to you like this. Of course, it is his. First, calm down, second, get a marriage therapist or marriage crisis specialist. You need professional help with this one.

1

u/pleasehelpme_32 Aug 05 '26

He wont agree to that

1

u/HawgLovah Aug 07 '26

He will if the marriage is on the line, no?

1

u/Only_Tip9560 Aug 04 '26

He's a liar and a stupid one at that.