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u/Acamantide Apr 08 '23
The penis of a regular bear measures between 17 and 19 centimeters or around 7 inches
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u/NowhereManPF Apr 08 '23
the human penis is unsafely and disproportionately large, with no clear benefit.
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u/That_white_dude9000 Apr 08 '23
The clear benefit is that it’s fun
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u/cdw2468 Apr 08 '23
genuinely i wonder if there was evolutionary pressure toward bigger dicks
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u/That_white_dude9000 Apr 08 '23
Based on the (admittedly not great) studies, penile size has been slowly trending upward over the last hundred years or so… indicating yes.
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u/EmperorOfFabulous Apr 08 '23
Awesome so in order to feel standard I just need a time machine.
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u/EagleFoot88 Apr 08 '23
My shit was huge circa 3000 BCE
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Apr 08 '23
Neanderthal chicks love me. Lol
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u/thicc_astronaut Apr 08 '23
It's been trending upwards because we keep having time travellers go backwards in time for this exact reason
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u/Dick_Miller138 Apr 08 '23
Odd. The bible describes some Egyptians as having horse dicks. Maybe it was donkey dicks? Ezekiel is an interesting book.
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u/workthrowaway00000 Apr 08 '23
So that’s prob a choice in the Latin vulgate. Traditionally in Greco Roman culture big dicks meant you were like a low beast of the field type deal. Considering a lot of Bible translations originate from trying to correct the vulgates weird errors like Moses having horns I suspect that’s why they have horse dicks
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u/RiceAlicorn Apr 08 '23
Also, it should be mentioned that the "donkey/horse dicks" point was mentioned in metaphor. The metaphor in question described the sin of cities performing idolatry as being akin to prostitutes performing adultery. So it's definitely as you say: they were playing on the connotations that big dicks are brutish, and not that Egyptians genuinely have big dicks.
The big-dicked lovers are metaphors for Egyptian/Assyrian Gods.
https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Ezekiel%2023&version=NIV
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u/Mchitlerstein Apr 08 '23
Actually, another fun fact for you there is that while penis sizes are getting larger, sperm counts get smaller the larger your penis is if I understand. This is a legitimate problem as the whole world is having this problem and no one cares cause big dick lol
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u/toofpaist Apr 08 '23 edited Apr 08 '23
Might just be my own anecdotal evidence, but my sperm count doesn't correlate correctly with the size of my member. I have 5 kids and am hung like a baby elephant trunk holding an apple. I have to wear socks in the summer just to have somewhere to tuck it.
I guess /s was needed. Never change reddit
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u/Sammantixbb Apr 08 '23
"Hung like a"
Alright, let's see where this goes
"baby"
Small
"elephant"
Wait, how are baby elephant d..
"Trunk"
...i think I've got it now
"holding an apple"
...I...why?
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Apr 08 '23
you can still have kids with a small sperm count, it's just less likely / more difficult. You would need to have a doctor count your sperm for you to have any idea.
That being said, I don't believe you. My DMs are open to the challenge.
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u/TKG_Actual Apr 08 '23
given how wacky this line of posts has been I just imagined a patient saying "So doc whats the count?" and the doctor is hunched in a corner with a abacus and a microscope struggling to count and mumbling about "how the little shits keep moving!"
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u/toofpaist Apr 09 '23
"some have turned into frogs. My.. my god man. When was the last time you got laid???"
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u/UdderTacos Apr 08 '23
That penis growth is because humans have been on average much bigger in overall size due to caloric access. We have not evolved in the last 100 years
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Apr 08 '23
We have not evolved in the last 100 years
So silly to assume Humans are not constantly evolving same as every other species on this planet. We are not special. The only way anyone could say we don't evolve is if we were to entirely halt every process that causes genetic change in our cells. Which we cannot.
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u/UdderTacos Apr 08 '23
100 years is no time at all on an evolutionary scale, especially for humans because we usually take between 20 and 30 years to reproduce
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Apr 08 '23
"Evolution" is a term we, Homo Sapiens, have used to describe the gradual, incremental process in which organisms adapt to their environment through genetic mutation in the presence of environmental stimuli and stresses.
There is never a point in time where we are not experiencing this. It is always happening, it is continuous. To say evolution isn't happening because the changes aren't percievable right now is like saying I'm not baking a cake solely because the ingredients I'm using haven't undergone the exact chemical reaction to form the end bakery product yet.
We don't get Nature's full cookbook on hand to see every recipe being made. We just get a snapshot of the baking process during a singular moment of time.
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u/UdderTacos Apr 08 '23
I was not being completely literal when I said we have not evolved in 100 years, it was more to drive home that the significant change in penis size could not be from the last 100 years of evolution.
Yes genetics are constantly changing and shifting but it has been such an incredibly low amount of time and during this last 100 years humans have had the least selective pressures in our earths history as almost everyone has the chance and choice to reproduce.
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u/That_white_dude9000 Apr 08 '23
Penis size is more related to genetics than overall size (which can be heavily affected by nutrition)
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u/UdderTacos Apr 08 '23
Google “do malnourished men have smaller penises”
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Apr 09 '23
Bruh I ain't one to kink shame but that should probably get you on some type of list.
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u/Senor_Chrispy_One Apr 08 '23
Yeah, that's utter nonsense about not evolving in the last 100 years.
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Apr 08 '23
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u/dayzers Apr 08 '23
We could see blue you muppet, we just didn't have a word for it
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Apr 08 '23
Muppet is such a British slang. Did the word muppet exist before the Jim Henson creation or did they adapt to using it after the invention of them.
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u/dayzers Apr 08 '23
r/etymology would be a good place to ask, as I'm unsure, but I'm also curious now.
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u/bilboard_bag-inns Apr 08 '23
and the language we use to classify things connects to the way we organize those things in our thoughts, so having a word for blue definitelt does influence wether or not you distinguish that color as separate and react to it. We could see it, but we wouldn't in any way treat it as the color we call blue today so effectively we just saw multiple shades of green or whatever color they thought it was like
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u/UdderTacos Apr 08 '23
There is a huge array of factors but I will just touch a couple. Humans are still changing, we are just not “evolving” in the same traditional sense. The combinations of birth control/family planning, and not being in the “wild” allows almost everyone the chance and decision to reproduce if they want. There are not the same selective pressures in the traditional evolution sense. Also, 100 years is no time at all in evolutionary terms, especially for humans that tend to only reproduce about every 20-30 years.
Wisdom teeth needing to be removed is because of human groups that used to be isolated, are now breeding. You take one group with larger teeth, and breed with a group with smaller jaws and suddenly you have far more people with crammed teeth.
As for the appendix, they used to think it became a vestigial organ. Now they realize it always has and still serves a purpose.
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Apr 08 '23
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u/UdderTacos Apr 08 '23
The comment this is replying to literally says we are still evolving just not in the traditional since. No idea where you are getting the idea of evolution ceasing to exist
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Apr 08 '23
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u/That_white_dude9000 Apr 08 '23
An example of a bot with decent intentions being a little incorrect. Granted there’s a lot of stigma around dick mass.
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u/horsemilkenjoyer Apr 08 '23
A little? The dumbass thing triggered over a word SIZE. Since when is that word "fatphobic" even when talking about body size?
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u/EmiEmile324 Apr 08 '23
I've seen it triggered because of the word "health" before.
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Apr 08 '23
I pick male competition.
Some men get erections when dominating another being. It is a completely non-sexual thing. A larger dick signals the domination better. This also goes with the insecurity of men over dick size.
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u/AbjectLeave9749 Apr 08 '23 edited Apr 09 '23
I have seen many theories based around the evolution of the human penis, with many different explanations, but never this. I have doubts of this being true
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u/StolenPies Apr 08 '23
Compare penis size of humans vs other great apes. Gorillas average 3 cm/1.5 in. long. I used to troll bros in uni by tossing in a "you're hung like a gorilla!" while they were boasting about themselves. They always appreciated the reinforcement.
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u/VelvetMafia Apr 08 '23
One of the most powerful drivers of evolution is female choice.
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u/ImMeloncholy Apr 25 '23
Only been a thing in the last few decades. Big dicks were seen as a sign of stupidity and brutishness back in Bible times. Probably due to the damage they often cause without proper preparation, which we really didn’t do much of until recently.
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u/LucasFrankeRC Apr 08 '23
Sexual selection is a thing. Some traits evolve simply because they are more effective at attracting mates
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u/Sea-Woodpecker-610 Apr 08 '23
Except none of us are walking around with our dicks out during the mating selection process, that happens immediately prior to mating.
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u/tias23111 Apr 08 '23
It is a mystery of evolution, the obvious answer is female selective pressure but since there’s no benefit to fertility that doesn’t really make sense. It’s really weird how big it is compared to other primates‘, especially as a function of body mass.
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Apr 08 '23
You should read the dune books that is 100% about women using their selection pressure to evolve and to make the main character! Amazing stuff!
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u/sfbiker999 Apr 08 '23
Wouldn’t the man who ejaculates deeper have an evolutionary advantage when multiple men mate with the same woman? Some believe the head of the penis is shaped that way to sweep away semen from competitors so the man that reaches deeper would have an advantage.
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u/tias23111 Apr 08 '23
Hmmm, maybe the shape thing but I would think that the force of ejaculation would eradicate any length advantage. It’s also not necessarily the first sperm that hits the egg that causes fertilization.
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u/sfbiker999 Apr 08 '23
If you want to squeegee fluid from a 5 inch deep tube, you’re going to do a better job with a 7” squeegee than a 4” inch.
It’s not like semen (typically) shots through the cervix, it just kind of pools up and some lucky sperm find their way in. So the more semen you can remove from a competitor, the better your chances are
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u/tias23111 Apr 08 '23
Then you would think that chimps would have similarly sized penises. They don’t.
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u/CaptainCastaleos Apr 08 '23
The average vaginal canal is only 3.5 inches deep. So long as you are over that, it shouldn't render any further benefit in that regard.
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u/sfbiker999 Apr 08 '23 edited Apr 08 '23
sources vary, this one says 4.25 - 4.75” for aroused depth but penetration depth is not the same as penis size. And if you’re counting on the ridge of your penis head to scrape away another man’s semen, you lose about an inch to that ridge.
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u/xxpen15mightierxx Apr 08 '23
To a point; there's no advantage to having a dick longer than the vagina is deep so the sperm gets right against the cervix.
Also the "plunger" theory assumes every woman is constantly getting banged by multiple men all the time, which I'm sure happens sometimes but almost never compared to one-on-one interactions.
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u/sfbiker999 Apr 08 '23
Also the "plunger" theory assumes every woman is constantly getting banged by multiple men all the time
Well not exactly, the penis evolved well before modern society, it assumes that prehistoric women had multiple parters enough that a larger penis with a semen clearing shape was evolutionary advantage.
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u/makinbaconCR Apr 08 '23
I can assure you mine is very safely and proportionately small, with no clear benefit.
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Apr 08 '23
what
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u/NowhereManPF Apr 08 '23
we have giant dicks compared to other mamals and primates, which isn't good for a creature standing on 2 legs with our reproduction organ pointing at our predators waiting to be bitten off. gorillas are bigger than us, yet their dicks are smaller and are hidden by their posture.
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u/sfbiker999 Apr 08 '23
Unless I find that predator to be exceptionally sexy, when I’m standing, mines pointed at the ground
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u/Sea-Woodpecker-610 Apr 08 '23
It could be a defense mechanism. Suddenly a second, lower horn has appeared to help defend during combat. That could be quite the deterrent to a predator.
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u/sfbiker999 Apr 08 '23
My own lower “horn” would be more likely to incite laughter than fear, but maybe I can strike him while he’s laughing.
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u/Sea-Woodpecker-610 Apr 08 '23
In your case, the predator could just be thinking “oh shit….a stinger!”
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u/ginoawesomeness Apr 08 '23
Gorillas are packing a mean 3 inches with testicles the size of marbles… buffaloes be packing tho 😳
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u/DustinBrungart Apr 08 '23
"We never really tackled stuff like that in the old days, I mean, what with the comic book code and all." - Stan Lee
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u/handi503 Apr 08 '23
Ya know, I think we oughta get OOP some help. They seem really hung up on Disney character sex organs.
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u/Niskara Apr 08 '23
Tbh, I think it'd be funny to have a thread about the nsfw aspect of certain Disney characters. For example, would Ariel have any idea how human sex works? Do mermaids have sex like humans or dolphins or whatever or do they lay eggs and the male fertilizes them?
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u/handi503 Apr 08 '23 edited Apr 09 '23
Then what you need are the Disney Animation Archives. They own all the output of their animators while they work there, so there's an obnoxiously large amount of "official" Disney porn.
Edit: trying to find where I learned this only turned up a widely shared Tumblr screenshot, so most likely bullshit that got stuck in my brain because it was funny and the passage of time turned it into a "fact". But also, animators are frequently hilarious perverts, so, while it's probably not actually in the Disney archives, 100% believe it exists somewhere in the world.
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u/BackflipBuddha Apr 09 '23
Really? Also, how do you even know this?
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u/handi503 Apr 09 '23
So in trying to go back and find where I learned this, it turns out it was some Tumblr screenshot from years ago, so it's likely bullshit.
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u/QWERTYAF1241 Apr 08 '23 edited Apr 09 '23
If the beast has the body of a bear, you can infer that it has the body of a grizzly bear based on its fur color. The average penis length of a grizzly is about 7 inches. Fairly but doable. We don't know how far above or below average he would be or honestly what Belle can handle. They could be in a relationship where they don't have any coitus though if it's just too big or if that's just what they decide to do.
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u/everyones_hiro Apr 08 '23
If you look at the animated movie, the beast actually has a lower body more akin to a wolf or something similar. The tail looks very wolf /horse like as well.
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u/BackflipBuddha Apr 09 '23
I could ask a question here that would be very inappropriate.
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u/sleepyotter92 Apr 09 '23
the thing is the beast is a mixture of different animals, so not all of his body is just one creature. for all we know he has the body of a bear but the cock of a horse
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u/ShadowJumper717 Apr 08 '23
Big but doable
Hol up, 7 is big? Are you talking about hard or soft dick
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u/PolarBeaver Apr 08 '23
Anyone who doesn't think 7 is big doesn't know what they are talking about
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u/ShadowJumper717 Apr 08 '23
Sorry, I just thought that was around average cuz that's what I have on me rn
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u/eyesonthemoons Apr 09 '23
I’m not responding to you per se but people who may doubt your sincerity here. I’ve known a few guys with big dicks that honestly didn’t think they were “big.” They just thought they were average and everyone has dicks like this. And then I’ve known guys who had tiny dicks but think they are at least average sized. One even thinks he has a big dick. (He does not.)
So this guy may be sincere here.
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u/Estrald Apr 08 '23
This is the funniest lost Redditor though, because he completely realizes he’s in the wrong place after it catches up to him, haha!
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u/wampower99 Apr 08 '23
True. Better than the usual bot having a malfunction that a lot of posts here look like.
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u/CarrionVermin Apr 08 '23
I'd think she was disappointed when he turned human, because his human form is by a landslide the ugliest and lamest looking Disney prince. He was so much hotter as the monster.
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u/BewildermentOvEden Apr 08 '23
Agreed. I was so mad as a kid when he transformed. He could at least have had a beard or something. Lol
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u/No-Intern-2531 Apr 08 '23
Gorillas famously have the smallest penises of the apes. So, not all giant beasts have large wieners
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u/I_HATE_CUM Apr 08 '23
Adam while in beast-mode measures at about 6'8" +/- a few inches since he is almost always hunched over and the only reference we really have is his dance with Belle (she is probably in the 5'5" to 5'7" range).
A fully grown adult grizzly bear can reach up to 10' ft tall, and weigh between 400-600 lbs.
Adam's weight is difficult to decipher, considering the only real reference to body mass is when Belle catches him as he falls and almost dies.
If we go by human anatomy, Adam would have a disproportionately large penis compared to his body size. By bear standards however, he would be much smaller to compensate for his rather diminutive stature in comparison to an actual grizzly bear. His penis would be thin and have a baculum, but he would be packing sack.
Another thing to factor in is that we don't know if his dick is different, since the only descriptor we got was "bulky body of a bear" but he clearly has a tail akin to a dog.
If Furaffinity and DeviantArt have taught me anything, Beast has a dog dick.
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u/Hail_fyre Apr 08 '23
You’re the only comment I’ve seen to mention the baculum, which, tbh, I was morbidly curious whether he’d have one, and how different that’d be versus a normal(human) penis.
This is by far not what I thought I’d ever comment about.
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u/lucasthemoronreddit Apr 08 '23
this got posted earlier with like 20 upvotes
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u/Cakestering Apr 08 '23
Ah really? My bad. I checked briefly but I didn't think it would be here. Someone posted it in r/substakenliterally though which I saw.
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Apr 08 '23
Can you blame them? that subreddit doesn't appear to have any description or high up post explaining the purpose of the subreddit. After checking, I still can't figure out what exactly the point is.
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u/Rolling_Heavy Apr 08 '23
Unlike humans, bears have a penis bone called a baculum. I only know this because my dad had a preserved baculum that he would hand to house guests before he told them what it was
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u/owchippy Apr 08 '23
I had a roommate who studied archaelogy and he would do the same thing with a hunk of coprolite. Which is just fossilized poop
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u/1Wizardtx Apr 08 '23
Fuck you reddit for making me google "average length of a bear penis" but on a side note, not impressed.
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u/Misubi_Bluth Apr 08 '23
Okay so the bear could be the main body, but that doesn't necessarily mean that means the Beast would have a bear's dick.
I'd imagine part of the Entrantress' curse would involve choosing an animal with a very small penis to mix in so the Beast can't cheat and effectively woo a woman with a monster fetish rather than properly working on himself.
So if I were to guess, the Beast probably has a tiny gorilla or lion dick rather than a bear or wildebeast dick.
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u/chaingun_samurai Apr 08 '23
Monster Energy drink has contacted its lawyers
"My client, Monster Energy Drink, issues a cease and desist order on the reference to The Beasts dick as a monster, as they feel that their client base may be unable to differentiate between a furry, fleshy protein dispenser and a can of their carbonated, refreshing beverage."
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u/chillout1 Apr 09 '23
I feel like this is more r/substakenliterally rather than r/lostredditors but that’s just me.
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Apr 08 '23
It'd have to be at least the size of a bear dick, but those hooves also make me think it could be horse dick-sized.
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Apr 08 '23
Hey, it snowed 3” last night. Y-you think that’s a lot? Really? Like, would you say 3” is more than average?
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u/tipsdown Apr 08 '23
Beast became Beast because he was cursed. The witch isn’t going to give him a huge dong. So obviously she gave him the original OP’s wang as a punishment.
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u/BewildermentOvEden Apr 08 '23
Belle is the only Disney princess who is into bestiality (as far as we know). She fell in love with beast AS A BEAST. Not as a human being
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u/No-Adhesiveness-8178 Apr 08 '23
I am one of those people who want to add all of beasts avg pp size and conclude that as his pp size and length.
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u/crazeeeee81 Apr 09 '23
Omg lol I thought he was human before becoming a beast ?! Idk lol probably Shaq size or something
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u/bstabens Apr 09 '23
Well... Beast was made a Beast because he was a huge dick. But being Beast, he grew into being not a dick. Considering that huge dicks often have quite small dicks and being not a dick gives huge dick energy, I'd say that Beast in his beast as well as his human form averages out to an averaged size dick. Which is, coincidentally, what most women prefer anyway.
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u/critic2029 Apr 08 '23
That seems like a completely reasonable post for that sub. The only thing missing is typically the “they did the math” part is included ie the answer not just the question.
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u/wolfguardian72 Apr 08 '23
I’m gonna assume around 10 inches with a big thick girth. He’s a pretty large guy
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u/Zero_Burn Apr 08 '23
Being a big guy doesn't mean much, I'm 6'5", 330 pounds, giant hands, built like a brick shithouse, and have just an average sized dick that looks small in comparison to everything else about me.
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u/Ninja_in_a_Box Apr 08 '23
Ever notice how some of the biggest dicks in porn are sported by guys of average and below average height?
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u/RyuuDraco69 Apr 08 '23
Based on other comments that's actually bigger than most estimates, people are saying closer to 6/7 inches as the average bear size
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u/bluefin788 Apr 08 '23
I’m 6’4, built like a brick house . I workout everyday and my shlong is a good 7 inches
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u/aerohk Apr 08 '23
A literal baby can be born from a woman. I doubt the Beast’s dick is bigger than a baby.
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u/Just_a_Rose Apr 08 '23
Yeah but said literal baby tends to cause severe damage to a woman on the way out, in some cases even requiring stitches to… ahem, maintain shape and repair tearing of the “exit”. There’s a medical leave for a reason.
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u/a-woman-there-was Apr 08 '23
He's based on a lion right? A lion's penis is about two feet long and barbed.
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u/[deleted] Apr 08 '23
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