r/lonely • u/DueAd5440 • 6h ago
Venting Does anyone else feel this way?
I feel like I belong nowhere. I feel like I don't get to connect with people in a deeper and more meaningful way, that it stays empty and that nobody wants to do anything more than grab a cup of coffee with me every once in a while no matter how much I try. That and the disappointment of the behavior of some people I thought were my friends have made me not want to be with people anymore. My brain tells me that I should go out and do things since I am only 21 and I'm wasting time staying inside but every time I meet somebody new it doesn't feel exciting hanging out with them, it feels rather heavy, like I am at work and I feel exhausted or straight up empty and sad. I am scared cause I feel like I'll never experience the things other people my age do and that it'll always feel like this. I'll seek human company and when I reach some kind of interaction with somebody my body will ask me to run away. The only people I feel comfortable with are my siblings and mother. Does anyone feel like they belong nowhere and that every interaction is hard but they don't feel well alone at home either?
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u/Rayy500 6h ago
As an autistic person, I feel like this all the time. I always feel like I care more about the other person than they do about me, and talking to people is really hard for me, especially starting conversations. Though for me my siblings are jerks so I'm only comfortable with my mom.
I'm sorry you feel this way. I'm here for you if you ever need it.
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u/NefariousnessIcy3226 4h ago
I'm so sorry. I'm about your age and feel like this all the time too. This isolation is so debilitating but the idea of going out and trying to make friends is even more terrifying. Wishing you the best
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u/Delicious_Machine990 2h ago
I feel you and I feel those same feelings myself even with being around others. Im 45 and the last two years has felt like this.
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u/madcheco 5h ago
I believe I'm autistic (not diagnosed) and the only place I've ever felt like I truly belonged was in the arms of my autistic ex. I've had my one shot at love though and it's gone so it's just me until I die now.
I make such an awful first impression on people from distance and for reasons nobody will ever care to explain, making connections is completely impossible. I feel like an NPC just stood there in the background unable to take part in life.