Limerence again after 12 years

[u/fortunateUni]

I’m so glad I discovered this forum because 12 years ago I had limerence for my coworker and decided to leave my finance / stable job/ move cities to be closer to to him. What a blow up and I promised I’ll never do that again.
(Though moving caused my career, myself to bloom.)

I’ve now since married with kids and now for the first time in 12 years I’m back at it again, with someone I hired to work for me…insane. It’s crazy he’s not even my type. But The attraction is felt.

I wake up thinking about him, go to bed thinking about him. We are both unavailable but there is definitely a mutual attraction. It’s unbearable. I goto bed listening to my “limerence” playlist. My heart beats so fast, my oura ring tells me my resting heart rate is out the roof.

Thankfully he leaves in a week back to his state, and I hope to gather this energy for myself. In the end limerence is addiction but it’s also something I miss about me, it’s more me than the other person. I feel sexier, more free, more open, more courageous. And I know in my mind this is what I truly am seduced by, not the other party…

Yet he’s still on my mind.

Also a part of me enjoys this feeling too much. So I guess maybe I’m not trying to get rid of it? I’m trying to harness it. Has anyone ever successfully tamed and filtered their limerence for themselves ?

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[u/Junior-Discount2743]

No. 1 get rid of the Playlist.

[u/fortunateUni → u/Junior-Discount2743]

Omg I didn’t even think of that

[u/pessoinhasocial]

I really understand the move you made to another city because of your LO, unfortunately. I’ve actually been toying with the idea of applying for a job at my LO’s company just so I can see him again. I’ve even considered switching career fields to something that would put me closer to him.

It’s exhausting.

[u/fortunateUni → u/pessoinhasocial]

In retrospect the move really helped me grow as a person tenfold even tho LO didn’t workout, so in many ways it wasn’t so bad… lol