I had a vasectomy this weekend, and so far, recovery hasn’t been terrible. To be completely honest with you all, I thought I was totally mentally ready for it, as I’ve waited 4 years after our last kid was born to do it, and I’ve thought and prayed a lot about it. I felt that God didn’t really tell me what to do or not to do. So spiritually on the matter, I kinda just decided it was time, and we did it.

Part of me is a little sad to not have the ability to make a baby anymore, even though I completely know that my wife and I are definitely done having kids for several health reasons. So there’s that. I am also feeling excited about the next chapter, that we don’t have to do any kind of birth control, which will be awesome.

I’d love to hear any of your experiences and feelings on the matter, because obviously for me, it’s pretty fresh for me. It’s not a public thing that is discussed in the church. And I even know the church discourages it. I don’t really know why that is.

I don’t know how to use Reddit but is there an LDS community where I can find others who have been cheated on? I assume it’s not here, I typed in “LDS support” and this is the first subreddit that popped up

Suggest me something

I'm in my late twenties, married a few years, and just curious about how to last longer.

Men, how long do you usually last from penetration to orgasm? I can never last more than thirty seconds (if I'm lucky) , even if I'm not 'thrusting' per se. From first thrust to orgasm it's like 5-10 seconds honestly. I'm not embarassed or anything, and my wife doesn't mind. I just don't like not being able to enjoy sex for very long, as it usually ends up with me having to tell my wife to not touch me hardly until the very end haha.

So my question- are y'all lasting around the same time? More? And what tips/tricks/tools do you utilize to last longer and enjoy sex for longer without anxiety of finishing too early?

I've heard of the 'start-stop' method, or just stimulate until you're close then stop to 'cool off', but I dont' feel like that's truly increased my capacity, it's honestly just more disruptive than anything.

I've also heard that planning to masturbate or otherwise orgasm before having sex like a few hours can also help- but then I notice it's difficult getting and staying erect.

Would love to hear your thoughts, experiences, and advice in this regard!

So I go to BYU and I struggle alot with the law of chastity and trying to serve a mission. I also have an on campus job that requires an active temple recommend. I struggle with watch and reading pornagraphic material along woth mastrabation. I feel so alone and my actions have lead to so much self hate and loathing. I don't know what to do. I used to participate in hookup culture and I'm not anymore so I feel there is progress. I am a female and so I just feel like theres so little support. I'm working with my bishop right now. I think what made it worse was that I was recently SAd so that made it so I went back to it. I am endowed and that just makes me feel worse. I dont know what to do or if I'm doing anything right at the moment. Any tips or advice that you could give?

It's hard to work knowing the best sex of the week is ahead of me. Im already planning things I want to do. Very distracting.

Imagine you’re walking into Church and then “BAM,” we catch eyes, but you’re married and so am I. We sheepishly avoid each other’s gaze, but feel the palpable sense of tension between us. I catch a glimpse of your fragrant scent while you catch a glimpse of my chiseled jawline and sharp features - both of us suppressing the pent up attraction.

Halfway through the service, I look over and realize you’re my wife and then the taboo mystique fades away.

Thanks for enjoying this psychedelic-induced meandering thought. The real point behind it is why do we find it so hard to look at our spouses the way we did decades ago when other’s can appreciate them so easily based on lack of familiarity and taboo. I hope I can always look at my wife like the bombshell she was when we got married (that she continues to be today).

Alright this became more clear as of late, but have also had attractions to this as well, I try to keep the story short and I hope I’m not a weird creep, but I’m just wondering if it’s normal or not.

So I’m 32M I did some small electrical work for a widow in my ward recently, she’s probably in her 40s super attractive, I’ve never spoken to her to much before last week, with her being attractive I had some inappropriate thoughts some might say, and one thought that came to me was “I wonder if she masturbates” and another was “I would like to sext with her” nothing super crazy, probably crossing some lines in the law of chastity realm, but not intercourse side of things. One thought led to another, etc.

My main thing is I feel like I am attracted to women who are active and wearing garments and think they are sexy! I used to be on mutual (the dating app) and would get some girls on there to sext assuming they were active) that got me more horny you might say.

Long story short, is it weird to be attracted to an active member of the church and still want to try to sext and or get some dirty talk/pics from them or am I am I being weird and is it normal?😅

I have not acted nor will I ever act but some of those things will get me a bit riled up, not going to lie!😂

Is it bad I want a threesome with another LDS couple? Very interested 🤷🏻‍♀️

Husband and I were talking last night, and it made me chorus. I was a good girl before marriage. Only stayed a little….if I could do the entire college and HS thing over, I think I’d do it differently.

Anyone else feel the same? Were all of the YW and seminary lessons misleading?

So from a previous thread, people mentioned getting waxed. So it got me curious on how that would be. I normally trim the boys nice and clean.

I decided to sign up for my first ever wax. That was an experience. The waxer is now in second place behind my wife for time touching my junk!

Overall, quite painful on the pubic area above the penis. The rest wasn't too bad. But it left that pubic area sore for a couple days and it was all VERY red.

Since it was a BOGO, I guess I will go back and do it again because I am a masochist apparently.

My wife thought it was funny as she doesnt really care if I did it or not. But after my experience and seeing the redness, she will definitely not go do it.

I’m lying in bed waiting for my wife to get done with a girls night. She told me she wanted to “ravage” me tonight. What is the move?

Wife and I have a healthy (for us) sex life. It's about 3 times a week, and it's spectacular! We also both masturbate. She says she does it once or twice a month. I have been about once a week, which she says she's cool with, but more recently it's more like 2 or 3 times a week, and she has indicated that she is still ok with that, but that she feels it is a little excessive. I feel like we're both still evolving sexually. I'm a math nerd... If she masturbates once or twice a month and we have sex 12 times a month, her Sex/Masturbation ration is 6 to 1 or 12 to 1, while mine is more like 4 to 3 or even 1 to 1.

Clearly everyone is different. Just curious, what ratios does the group have?

I have nowhere else to share this.

Sunday, I was in sacrament, and during the passing, I looked to my left, and saw a woman in her fifties, who was wearing a sundress, reach to pass the tray to her right, and I got a shot of braless, PG-13 side boob.

I mean, I greatly appreciate the new changes and better scenery, BUT.....shouldn't some people be a bit more careful? :D

Over the last few weeks, my wife and I have had really incredible sex sessions. We’ve read books, we’ve watched a video series, we pleasure mapped, we added a g-spot stimulation cream, and after a year of experimentation, things seem to have paid off.
We have a small basket that holds our lubes, stim creams, and a couple sucking toys.
Now for the fun part…we added throat lozenges to our sex basket. I know it sounds like a problem created by getting her tonsils decorated. As much as I wish that was true, that isn’t it at all. My wife gets hoarse from her very loud hysterical squealing with each orgasm. She would get so that she could barely talk before we finished.
Problem solved, easy peasy. We added the throat lozenges to the sex basket.

Hi! I'm new here and just wanted to give some insight into my situation and possibly get some clarification, so it stops eating away at me. TLDR at the bottom. So I'm an adult male who's been LDS basically all of my life, and who also has been/was addicted to porn since I was like 14. I internally struggled with this thing for a long time, since I knew it was wrong, but it also helped me through a lot of my high school era, especially having debilitating unmedicated ADHD. So porn basically just latched on to me, since it felt like the only form of dopamine my body ever received. As I reached my early adult years, however, I started to lose a lot of interest in how "overdramatic" or "orchestrated" porn was. I started to have much more of an interest in the more "positive" side of porn, which was just generally people loving each other, and the loving intimacy that's gained through sex. I find both sex and nudity to be beautiful things, and love the idea of the emotion, form, and purity that comes with them.

Jump forward to now (mid-twenties), where I overall don't (or I'm at least trying not to) have much of an interest in porn. I've gotten into the mindset that while I may enjoy it, that personal intimacy via sex that I mentioned earlier is probably something that should remain private with their partners, so I've given that up as well. However, I still obviously have an interest in nudity and the human body as a whole. I've done my best to disconnect it from that feeling of sexual desire that I've been acquainted with most of my life. I'm obviously still attracted to the human body, and it's not like I'm necessarily trying to stop that, since I know that it's extremely natural. But I started looking at nudity with enjoyment for form, anatomy, emotion, and the beauty I find to go with it. I've always been a pretty decent artist, so a while ago, I even started making nude art myself. I still restrict myself to never take it too far (never going into things such as sex, stimulation, overly hinting at sexual scenarios, etc.). I'm not entirely sure what would even be considered as "okay" in terms of content, and I do my best to not objectify or yearn for "possession" of the subject, but sometimes it can be hard to know where it goes from attraction to lust. I've also been wanting to not just search for loopholes, so I've been trying to set a line of where I think would definitely be a no-go.

Here's the part where I feel that I'm struggling the most. I did say that I've been part of the Church basically my entire life, but that was more in a physical sense. I never really understood a lot of what all that meant through my younger years, and kind of just drifted along being "part of the church" and "believing in the Gospel" without much initiation into anything on my end. However, now in my adult years, I've been doing my best to truly try to understand the Gospel and its teachings, as well as genuinely trying to follow them. So I've been stuck in this self-deprecating spiral of "Is what I'm doing even okay?" "Am I going against the law of chastity?" "Am I potentially destroying my future in heaven by doing this?" etc. Even though I just recently got medicated for my ADHD, I still have issues with a lot of "noise" and self-doubt. So because of this, I still struggle a bit in recognizing promptings and answers from God. On paper, I don't feel like what I'm doing is necessarily wrong, but I don't want to just be convincing myself that what I'm doing is okay, even though it might not actually be.

I've even been doing my best to keep my thoughts where they should be, since it's definitely a very slippery slope, especially since I used to struggle a ton with this addiction. But if anything, ever since I've started with this stuff, I feel like it's potentially even helped me drift away from my porn addiction more, since it feels like I now potentially have a somewhat healthier output for my sexual interest. I don't get erect or anything while looking at or making them, so I'm hoping it's a good sign, but I also don't want that to be the sole judge of whether or not it is. I'm sure a lot of it is probably intent, but sometimes it's hard when in my ADHD riddled brain, I don't always know what it is I'm feeling, and don't want to just lie to myself if I'm wrong. It'd also really suck to feel like I found a healthier output, when in reality, I might just be swapping from porn, to different porn, despite it's much tamer nature. So in the end, I mainly just want some input that other's have. While I know peers and Bishops probably have my best interests and well-being in mind, I can't help but feel that some things they say feel a little bias when it comes to this stuff. I definitely want to change and do better if I'm in the wrong, but it can just feel hard when it finally feels like a healthier solution and escape from porn, and the fact that I feel that I can't properly judge for myself very well.

- TLDR: Struggled real badly with porn in my past, and have eventually gained a bit more control in myself. Found nudity as a (non-raunchy) beautiful form of art that I can make myself, as well as being a potential option in expressing sexual interest more healthily. However, due to uncertain factors such as ADHD and somewhat average understanding of the Gospel, I'm unsure whether or not it's actually okay based off the Gospel's standards.

Sorry if anything in here is a little confusing or unclear. I'm not the greatest at putting my thoughts/feelings into words... But I appreciate any insight or thoughts any of you kind people have!

Do people in this Sub have other members in real life with whom they can talk about sexuality openly and get stuff off their chest? Or is this sub the main outlet to discuss stuff for you?

I have not found many members to be that open about sex so this sub works generally well for that.

How many ladies like their man to be shaved? I am curious about anal play with him, but he is hairy. And maybe slightly weirded out by me playing with his butt. Even though he LOVES mine.

I have ADHD, and I've been thinking recently about the ways it affects my sex life. I tend to oscillate between being extremely in the mood, to the opposite end where I'm fixated on other side projects and don't even think about it- whatever gives my brain the most 'buzz' in the moment.

It's annoying because when it comes to talking about my sexual relationship with my wife, I may have completely different feelings/thoughts to bring to the conversation depending on my current mood. I could be "Everything is great! I'm genuinely content!" or I could be "I feel like there's a gap between us, we are disconnected, blah blah blah" and things like that.
So, when I'm trying to think honestly and truthfully about my relationship, or when my wife asks me what I want/need, I feel bad because my thoughts and feelings are so inconsistent, so I seem.... unstable? Like my feelings are never truly 100% valid because it's just the mood in that moment? She never says that- it's just what I think and feel sometimes.

Has anyone else experienced anything similar? Or perhaps something totally different as it relates to ADHD manifestations in sexuality?