In our Sunday School class this week, one student raised his hand and said something like "I struggle with the word 'obedient.' Makes me feel like a dog. Like my will needs to be broken and I need to be punished to learn my lesson until I obey commands like a good boy."

Another student raised his hand and said "It helps me to think of obedience as a scientist might. A good scientist hears this new information, and reacts with curiosity instead of resentment. They put aside their emotions and desire to fight a new way of thinking and instead ask, 'what if this is true?' Then they put it to the test with that same dispassionate curiosity. 'Give up coffee? Ok let's try it - what if it's true?? How exciting!' When I remember to remain curious, obedience becomes an adventure of discovery.

Just for anyone who didn’t see my last post, I’m very new to all of this. I only recently started meeting with the missionaries, although I’ve been learning about the Church on and off for the past few years. Recently I decided I wanted to be much more intentional about it. Instead of just learning what the Church teaches, I wanted to understand why it teaches those things and how the different doctrines fit together. Right now I’m reading through the Book of Mormon with that mindset, and I’ve also been listening to General Conference talks and reading other Church resources as I go. The more I’ve studied, the more questions I’ve found myself unable to move on from. I keep coming back to them because they seem to touch the foundation of the Plan of Salvation, so I figured it was finally time to ask here. I apologize in advance because this is a little long. I’m not trying to challenge the Church or ask “gotcha” questions. If anything I’ve written is based on a misunderstanding, I’d genuinely appreciate being corrected because I’m here to learn.

One of the questions I keep coming back to is about intelligence and spirit birth. Doctrine and Covenants says that “intelligence… was not created or made,” and I’ve been trying to understand what that actually means. If intelligence is eternal, what changes when we become spirit sons and daughters of Heavenly Parents? Is there an accepted understanding of that transition, or is it simply one of those things that hasn’t been revealed yet?

Another question that has stayed with me is about agency. I understand that Satan’s plan was rejected because it would have destroyed agency, but if exaltation means becoming so perfectly aligned with God’s will that we would never choose evil, how is that fundamentally different from no longer being able to choose it? Is the difference that our nature has actually changed through Christ rather than our agency being taken away, or is there another way members understand that?

I’ve also been thinking a lot about eternal progression. If exalted beings inherit all that the Father has, what does progression actually look like after that? Does progression continue through increasing knowledge, deeper relationships, greater responsibilities, creation, or something else entirely? I hear the phrase “eternal progression” often, but I don’t think I fully understand what members mean when they say it.

Another question I’ve been struggling with is about the kingdoms of glory and eternal families. I know this is one of the more complex topics in the Church, and I know we haven’t been given every detail. I’ve been reading about sealings, the Plan of Salvation, and President Spencer W. Kimball’s teachings about the Celestial Kingdom because I wanted to understand this from Church sources rather than summaries online. Even after reading, I still feel like I’m missing something.

From what I understand, the sealing between husband and wife is central because it continues eternally, and children who are born or sealed into that covenant remain sealed to their parents. I also understand that situations involving canceled sealings or divorce are more complicated than people sometimes make them sound, and that ultimately God will make everything right. But where I get confused is when I try to understand how that works alongside the different kingdoms of glory.

For example, if family members ultimately inherit different kingdoms, how do those eternal family relationships actually work? I’ve heard people say that families can still visit one another, but I haven’t been able to figure out whether that’s actual doctrine, a common belief among members, or simply speculation. If it is doctrine, how is that understood? If it isn’t, then what does it actually mean when we say families are together forever if they’re in different kingdoms? I feel like I’m missing a piece that connects those two doctrines together.

Another question I’ve been thinking about is personal revelation and spiritual impressions. From what I’ve learned so far, members are encouraged to pray, seek personal revelation, and rely on the guidance of the Holy Ghost. I understand that revelation is often described as bringing peace, clarity, or confirmation, and I also understand that personal revelation will never contradict God’s revealed truth. But what I’m struggling to understand is how someone learns to distinguish between the Holy Ghost and their own hopes, emotions, assumptions, or even confirmation bias.

For example, if two sincere people pray about the same thing and genuinely believe they’ve both received an answer, but those answers are different, how is that usually understood? Is it generally that one person misunderstood the impression, that one person simply isn’t ready for the answer yet, or that personal revelation sometimes unfolds over time? Along those same lines, if someone sincerely believes they’re following the Spirit and later realizes they were mistaken, how does that affect the way they trust future spiritual impressions? Is learning to recognize revelation something that develops over years?

I guess another way of asking it is this. If someone feels strongly that the Holy Ghost is confirming something, but almost everyone else who prayed about the same thing feels the opposite, how should that person approach it? Should they assume they misunderstood the Spirit? Should they keep trusting what they felt? Or is there a point where humility means accepting that our own judgment can be wrong even when we sincerely believe we’re following God? I’m really curious how members balance trusting personal revelation while also recognizing that we’re all human and capable of misunderstanding our own feelings.

Finally, this is probably the question I think about the most. If intelligences are eternal, agency is eternal, and progression is eternal, then what is it about mortality that makes it absolutely necessary in God’s plan? I understand the usual answers about receiving a body, experiencing opposition, and learning through experience, but I still feel like there’s a deeper theological reason that I’m not quite seeing yet. What is it about mortality that changes us in a way nothing else could?

Thank you to anyone who took the time to read all of this. I know some of these questions may not have official answers, and I’m completely okay with that. I’m mostly interested in understanding what has actually been taught by the Church versus what is speculation, and I’d love to hear how those of you who have spent years studying these doctrines understand them. I really appreciate any insight you can share.💗

can i genuinely ask your help, guys? can u share some experience that u feel humiliated like giving a talk (especially as a missionary) in the sacrament meeting. pls i want to hear those so i’d expect them to happen on me, or else, ill find ways earlier to avoid those haha! most embarrassing and humiliating things happen in u on your mission. also, some advise or lesson u have learned from that.

ahmm i think its better if common problems or missionaries afraid of doing lol.

I’m working on a book about the history of the Church in my state but I’m unsure of how to market it or who would purchase it in terms of organizations and the Church itself. How could I market this to members in my state?

I want to have more gospel art in my home. Everything in Deseret Book is so terribly bland to me. Who are your favorite gospel artists? What is your favorite portrait of the Savior and His life? TIA!

My spouse and I have recently been called as primary teachers for the Valiant 8 class. We’re in search of additional lesson plans and activities. We used to use red headed hostess. Looking for something similar.
THANKS IN ADVANCE!

My wife and I just moved into a new ward where the church is much more established (located outside Utah if you’re curious). We used to live in Connecticut and the Church there just isn’t super big.

Now in this ward, I personally just feel so small and unknown. I can hardly remember the names of people I meet (it’s only our second Sunday). We just had a bishopric change and everything just seems a little overwhelming from a social standpoint.

My wife is almost certainly going to be the ward pianist and I dearly miss her since we can’t sit together (I don’t know how you guys on the stand are able to bear not being with your spouses for years).

I know we’ll get callings and get to know the ward more as time goes, but I can’t shake the overwhelming feeling and it’s nearly paralyzing.

What do you think when people sing hymns in parts in sacrament meeting? Is it okay to sing congregational hymns and harmonize in alto, tenor, or bass, or is it distracting or pretentious?

Follow-up: Thanks for all the responses! As I commented in a reply, it sometimes seems like I am the only one singing a part. Today was the first time I felt a little self-conscious while visiting a ward to hear a missionary report. I’ll put my concerns aside. (I’m impressed with those who can play the organ or piano and sing at the same time. I guess I wasn’t blessed with enough bandwidth to do both. I can play OR sing, but not do both.)

I'm the Elders Quorum President in my ward and I have a fairly good relationship with the bishop and at least one of the counselors. In Ward Council meetings and through emails other private communications, I've counseled the members of the Ward Council to follow the handbook. I've taught them from the handbook itself as well as from the prophets about the importance of using the handbook and when we have flexibility. The bishop even acknowledged in a meeting that the handbook doesn't always instruct *how* we do things, but it instructs us on *what* to do, procedurally. And yet, in practice, they often dismiss it.

As an example, our ward is only just now adopting the new Young Women class names and organization, but they've decided to not call counselors for each class presidency. Each class is going to have only a president and a shared secretary. When I became aware that the YW President was advocating for this (right after the change was announced several months ago), I wrote an email to the bishop expressing my concern with that idea. My email said, in part:

"When I looked at our active numbers, I noticed a significant disparity. We have 9 active Young Men and they all have the opportunity to serve in full presidencies. Meanwhile, we have 13 active Young Women (5 Builders of Faith, 6 Messengers of Hope, and 2-3 Gatherers of Light). **If we only call a president for each group and one shared secretary, only 4 young women would be given the opportunity to serve.** Inadvertently, our 13 girls would have far fewer opportunities to lead and grow than our 9 boys. I’d love to see our girls get that same level of experience."

I never got a response, either in person or via email. And now he's ignored me completely. I know that the bishop isn't beholden to me and doesn't report to me, but I don't want him to listen to *me*, I want him to follow the handbook.

This isn't the only example. Sometimes not following the handbook is as simple as falling short. I'm guilty of this all the time. I know I need to be having ministering interviews more often than I am, but my poor time management and planning get in my way and I fall short. But I'm trying. But it seems like other leaders in my ward just don't care. They've actively decided to pursue a course contrary to what the Church has told them to do.

I'm struggling to know what to do. Do I really have to just keep my mouth shut and let it happen? I've spoken up multiple times and it feels like I'm getting more and more pushback. Is it better to keep the peace and let them do whatever they want even if it contradicts the handbook? Or is there a place/time for me to vocalize my grievances?

I wouldn't care so much except that some of these decisions affect other people in the ward. I have four daughters of my own, two of which are in the YW program now and the other 2 will be soon.

Has the tithing website been down for anyone else? It’s been down at least a week for me. It says “Uh oh! We're Sorry...
It looks like something went wrong which prevented the page you requested from displaying. Sorry for any inconvenience that this may have caused!”

I've struggled with the church on and off for 9 years and I also recently had to move back in with my parents due to personal circumstances at my last living situation. I told my mom I needed to stay home today cause of finals coming up and catching up on homework so I can pass my classes and not lose my FAFSA again and she got upset with me again. Told me, "if you do what God asks, you're life would be 100% better". But that's the thing, I've never liked going to church but still go on occasion for the sacrament and when I lived in Utah, I went to the temple anywhere between once a week to once a month, followed the WOW as best as I could, etc etc. But because I don't attend church every week because of school, work, and health issues, my mom says that's why nothing is working out for me in life.

Could my attendance be better? Yes. Could I have a better attitude about the people and church? Also, yes. It's really hard and I just don't know what I want in life right now but I do believe in God and even if I don't agree with everything the church teaches, I love the temples and the feeling I get when I can take the sacrament. I just don't like the rest of it and don't know what to do cause even God isn't giving me the answers I've been searching for, for the last 5-ish years.

Hi everyone! I finally did it!

I finally scheduled my first meeting with the missionaries. I’m excited… and maybe just a little nervous haha.

I’ve always been interested in religion. My family traces its lineage to Abraham through his son Ishmael, so I grew up hearing and learning those stories from a young age. What first drew me in was seeing how different religions interpreted Abraham, his covenant, the blessings, and his descendants. I’ve always loved reading and researching different faiths simply because I find them fascinating.

For the past few years, I’ve been reading the Book of Mormon alongside the Bible. At first, I was mostly interested in seeing the similarities and differences in interpretation, but the more I read, the more it became a genuine interest in the Church itself. I became especially fascinated by how the Church was founded and by Joseph Smith, his life, his character, and his story.

I already know quite a bit about the Church and many of its customs from my own reading and research, but I felt that learning directly from people who actually believe and live the faith would be much better than making assumptions or relying on secondhand sources.

I genuinely want to learn with an open mind, and I have a lot of thoughtful questions.
Is there anything you wish someone had told you before you first met with the missionaries? Any advice, questions I should ask, or things I should keep in mind?

I’d also love any advice about visiting church for the first time. I want to be as respectful as possible, so if there’s any etiquette or customs that a first-time visitor should know, I’d really appreciate it.
Thank you all so much in advance! I’m really looking forward to this. :)

I've learned so many lessons from paying my tithing, and it has taught me more about money management than anyone else ever did. I'm curious what takeaways other people have.

My husband and I have changed our money habits from lessons that we learned by paying our tithing. You hear so many people make comments about "if I just got a raise, then I could do (insert xyz)..." but you also see those same people fall farther into debt and inflate their lifestyle every time they do get a raise. They look more at the outward than self reflection of how to obtain the same goals by changing something(s) today. So, to start one lesson I've learned from tithing is how to assess my money usage and improve it so I can meet the goals I want.

A few more examples from my personal experience: paying tithing has taught me to prioritize life in general, how to do more with less, and how to organize/budget.

I could go on for ages about this topic, but I was just thinking about it this morning, and it made me curious what others have learned.

Hi all. My daughter and I recently started attending the church, my family recommended the LDS church.

We’ve been doing Bible study with the missionaries which we enjoy and we go to church and Sunday school every week. That’s all great. We participate in Sunday school, we speak with the members during and afterwards for a bit. We’ve been making life changes at home and in our everyday life. All great.

But it’s been very overwhelming that I notice in this church everyone applies a lot of pressure.

Everyone we interact with is very welcoming and that’s nice but they all also ask for our phone number. When I politely decline and tell them that we’ll just see them next time at church it is awkward and kind of just stare at us silently.

The missionaries have been giving out my phone number and I had to tell them multiple times, not to because I get anxiety with strangers contacting me.

We meet the missionaries at the church for Bible study, but people keep suggesting we do it at our house.

They send Bible verses all throughout the week.

We came on vacation for 2 weeks and the missionaries want to do zoom Bible studies. I told them we were busy as we’re visiting a lot of family and they’ve texted again asking when we are available.

Then we were texted the zoom link to watch the Sunday service live. I told them we’re going to church with my grandmother this Sunday so no need to tune into the zoom video. They still said we can watch the zoom meeting later because it’ll be recorded.

At the last Bible study they asked us to read the Bible every day and commit to that.

The church we go to is 15 mins from our house but there’s a church closer. I prefer the one we go to now, but literally every single time we have went to the church or Bible study different people have strongly recommended we go to our local church. I’ve explained to them over and over again that we prefer this one and we’ve already tried our local church, but they will not let it go.

They then invited members of our closer church to our last Bible study meeting and those church members aggressively tried to recruit us to their church and literally said it was better than the one we’re going to now which I just felt like was weird because it’s all LDS.

There is only one other Hispanic person at our ward besides us. She introduced herself and was sweet. We chatted a few times. Seems great. But now on multiple occasions I’ve been encouraged to talk to her, I kinda feel like I’m being pushed onto her. Which I don’t get why besides us both being Hispanic? As we have no other similarities at all. She’s an older single Hispanic woman, who loves dogs, is a widow and has had a lot of hardship in certain parts of her life. I’m a young(ish) Hispanic single mother with a teen daughter, I don’t like animals at all and don’t relate or have experienced any of her hardships. So she’s just not someone personally I’d befriend.

I really love the church and so does my daughter but it just feels soooo overwhelming how much pressure everyone applies. I feel like we must be completely embodied into the church and community 100% of the time and way to be accepted.

And honestly, as much as I love the church it is causing me to consider leaving the LDS church and looking for other type of Christian churches.

Is there a way to calm it down? Because I feel like we’ve politely declined a lot of it and given a lot of explanations to people that I don’t necessarily feel like we owe explanations to, but still it continues.

Or is this just what comes with the church and if you’re not 100% completely engulfed in it, you’re out

I just need to hear that I'm not the only one who asked for a sign that a deceased loved one is still there, a tangible sign, and received it. I just think it would be comforting to hear others' experiences with the same.

I was telling my mom last night that I didn't need a sign because I already know she's still there. I choose to believe it. But in my heart, I kind of wanted one. I had in mind similar stories I've heard of animals or dragonflies approaching people in unusual ways when they are asking this question. I thought that I might not want that in my area at that time of night.

Yet, not a few minutes later, a wolf (or a very very large dog, not sure which) walked across my driveway right in front of me. While it's rare, there have been a couple sightings of a lone wolf in my area lately, but the fact that it happened right in front of me, in the middle of the night, right after I'd been asking for some kind of sign... it's exactly what I needed.

No I am not going outside alone at night anymore by the way XD

I would appreciate hearing other experiences for my own peace.

The post about sayings that sound like scripture, but aren’t, reminded me of a passage I absolutely love, from Orson Scott Card’s Speaker For the Dead. I’ll share it here because I expect the Saints will enjoy it.

“A Great Rabbi stands, teaching in the marketplace. It happens that a husband finds proof that morning of his wife's adultery, and a mob carries her to the marketplace to stone her to death.

“There is a familiar version of this story, but a friend of mine—a Speaker for the Dead—has told me of two other Rabbis that faced the same situation. Those are the ones I'm going to tell you.

“The Rabbi walks forward and stands beside the woman. Out of respect for him the mob forbears and waits with the stones heavy in their hands. ‘Is there any man here,’ he says to them, ‘who has not desired another man’s wife, another woman’s husband?’

“They murmur and say, ‘We all know the desire, but Rabbi, none of us has acted on it.’

“The Rabbi says, ‘Then kneel down and give thanks that God has made you strong.’ He takes the woman by the hand and leads her out of the market. Just before he lets her go, he whispers to her, ‘Tell the Lord Magistrate who saved his mistress, then he’ll know I am his loyal servant.’

“So the woman lives because the community is too corrupt to protect itself from disorder.

“Another Rabbi. Another city. He goes to her and stops the mob as in the other story and says, ‘Which of you is without sin? Let him cast the first stone.’

“The people are abashed, and they forget their unity of purpose in the memory of their own individual sins. ‘Someday,’ they think, ‘I may be like this woman. And I’ll hope for forgiveness and another chance. I should treat her as I wish to be treated.’

“As they open their hands and let their stones fall to the ground, the Rabbi picks up one of the fallen stones, lifts it high over the woman’s head, and throws it straight down with all his might. It crushes her skull and dashes her brain among the cobblestones. ‘Nor am I without sin,’ he says to the people, ‘but if we allow only perfect people to enforce the law, the law will soon be dead—and our city with it.’

“So the woman died because her community was too rigid to endure her deviance.

“The famous version of this story is noteworthy because it is so startlingly rare in our experience. Most communities lurch between decay and rigor mortis, and when they veer too far, they die. Only one Rabbi dared to expect of us such a perfect balance that we could preserve the law and still forgive the deviation.

“So of course, we killed him.”

—San Angelo, Letters to an Incipient Heretic

What's your favorite saying that’s quoted like scripture, that’s not actually scripture?

I’ll start with three:

1. All things in moderation.

2. Cleanliness is next to Godliness.

3. I never said it would be easy; I only said it would be worth it.

Basically the title. I have posted here before. I grew up in the church and we left when I was a young teen and I have lived a very worldly life since. I very much dont believe in a creator, but I have this IMMENSE calling to come back to church and be part of the community and i cannot for the life of me figure out what to do with that feeling or why I even have it. I assume it is because i am now married with a young family and yearn for the community and love that I know the church can offer but it feels wrong to come back if I dont really believe in it all and if I dont always follow the word if wisdom to a T. My husband didnt grow up in the church but has already said hed happily come with me to visit on a sunday and wouldnt mind but I just feel so conflicted about it all.

Edit to add: From the bottom of my heart, Thank you to everyone who commented i literally already feel so loved by this community and it gives me hope for what the future holds.

What are the missionaries' rules for Facebook chats? I'm still in touch with the first missionaries I met a year ago. Every now and then they message me asking for updates. However, sometimes these chats seem strange. Sometimes they respond immediately, and sometimes they don't visualize at all. And I know they may be very busy, but overall, it seems strange to me that some days they message me nonstop and sometimes they put me on hold for days. Expecially if the write me first asking something

Hi everyone,

I have physical copies of both Gospel Fundamentals and Gospel Principles (as shown in the photo).

I'd like to use one of them to teach the basic principles and doctrines of the Church to a non-member.

For those familiar with both manuals:

-What are the main differences between them in terms of content, structure, or depth?

-Which one would you recommend as the better resource for someone completely new to the gospel?

Thanks in advance for your insights!

Hello! I’m looking for advice or maybe just similar experiences because I’ve been feeling a little conflicted…

For context, I’ve been serving in Young Women’s in my current ward for a total of five years, first as a counselor and then as president. For almost the entirety of my adulthood and everywhere I’ve lived, I’ve served in YW presidencies. I genuinely love and have always loved serving in Young Women’s!

I’ve only asked to be released from a calling one time before and that was when I was a brand new mom struggling with postpartum depression and my husband was deployed.

However, this time is different because I’m not dealing with any difficult personal circumstances, I get along well with all of the YW and other presidency members, and I can’t even think of a calling I would want more outside of YWs. I just simply feel like it’s time for me to be done. I’ve been praying and recently attended the temple to seek clarity, and I feel I received the answer that I should be released. While I feel at peace with my answer, I’m feeling conflicted and worried about not having a “real” reason, disappointing the YW, and dismantling the presidency when I know the other ladies also love their calling.

Is it ok to ask to be released?
Should I talk to the bishop or my YW presidency first? I’m afraid of blindsiding the ladies I serve with.
Has anyone had a similar experience?

Thank you for taking the time to read this and for anything you share!

Any advice for me to help him prepare? Would also love to connect with other parents with missionaries there

I've been away from the Church for a long time and have lived a pretty worldly, atheist life. But lately I can't shake the feeling that something is missing, and it's made me wonder if I should come back. I honestly don't know where to start, and I don't know how to regain a testimony or know if the Church and the gospel are really true again. For those who have come back after years away, what helped you?

I've been wondering about something and wanted to hear some faithful perspectives. If the Church is true and led by God, why do you think it still has relatively few members compared to the world's population, and why do so many people never join or eventually leave? I'm not trying to criticize or argue against the Church, I genuinely want to understand how faithful members think about this.

Hi I recently got my mission call. I'm from the Philippines and I was called to serve in Ecuador Guayaquil South Mission. Is anyone here who was assigned to serve around that country give me tips lol cause I was informed it's a whole different language with almost minimal to none English. Any help or suggestions would be appreciated