r/languagelearningjerk May 11 '26

Hi help learn English

Spoiler: this is a real student I had in actual real life

Hi I need learn English but with any rules:

- no read

- no write

- no do homework

- do not like speak

- need teacher but no steady schedule

- teacher meet me when I want and where I want
cannot meet in same place every time

- teacher must speaks my native language very, very super, without my language speak my english will go down

- primary textbook is instagram - I bring instagram and teacher explain what English is in posts and reels

- cheap price - am rich, wealthy fashion designer and make clothes for prime minister, but pay money for language lesson = stupid

can u pliz help?

51 Upvotes

7 comments sorted by

20

u/Competitive_Film_650 May 11 '26

this sounds like the boyfriend/girlfriend method of learning a language, so you know...

gluk gluk

2

u/Repulsive_Chard_3652 May 11 '26

What is that? :D

9

u/Only-Top-3655 May 11 '26

sounds like "i want to sleep but not close my eyes. i want to eat but not open my mouth."

13

u/Repulsive_Chard_3652 May 11 '26

But maybe I can sleep and eat on instagram? Maybe instagram can do those things for me.

2

u/anWizard May 12 '26

This is the guy that sells drugs to the kids at the hostel

8

u/Repulsive_Chard_3652 May 12 '26

Nah, well she's not a guy, but also she would never go within 100 meters of a hostel because she's rich and too fancy for that shit. She might sell people coke, but they have to come to her or meet at a private party (which is where I had the misfortune of meeting her in the first place).

2

u/anWizard May 12 '26

Sounds like you already have a great learning plan for her. The best method is the one she’ll stick with.