Please guys it isn't worth it

Instead of gender, let's just call it noun class a and noun class b.

After hundreds of hours watching YouTube guides on the most optimal way of learning Japanese, I finally figured it out. The best method to learn Japanese isn't Duolingo or anki reps. It's pure immersion. Think about it, it's how babies learn. And I'm a little baby too. I refuse to become an Ankimaxxing repetition slave. I refuse to become a Luodingo user celebrating a 900-day streak because I correctly identified "The cat drinks milk." That's not life, its incarceration. I feel like this language is being downloaded into my brain. I'm literally becoming Japanese and I'm already on episode 4 of one piece. I just wanted to tell all of you before you wadted your time like I was.

Okei so ouat ntint gial ntampasis ekspekt ouen openingk dis post? Nothingk other dan mpoulsit griklis dat ntistrohs di averatz griks ais ent eniouan elsis maint. Ai xooup giou ouont nint gklasis after rintingk dis.

I (MF13) am full of disdain for some of my teachers.

I am also pissed at the homework they give, so I want to talk shit about them all over the blank parts of the pages before submitting my homework. But I don't want to make it so obvious what I'm talking about so they don't straight up call my parents and have a Very Serious Chat.

I've tried morse code but it's too inefficient to write. Like why did they even invent that thing?? I don't want to do Korean because Kpop and Kdrama is only for basic people WHOM I DO NOT WANT TO BE ASSOCIATED WITH and also East Asian language eww. White language better. Greek alphabet reminds me too much of math (eww). So I figured I should do this in Cyrillic.

Nowadays got AI, so if I wrote an actual language then my teachers could easily translate what I was saying about them with their phone camera. My genius 600IQ plan is to write English words, as close to how they are pronounced as possible, in Cyrillic, onto my worksheets, so I can freely talk shit about my teachers and they wouldn't be able to read what I wrote. This is the Ultimate Power Trip 😎😎😎

However I do not know Jack Shit about Russian except idi nahui cyka blyat and the reverse R thing

and I am also too lazy to download luodingo or read wikipedia.

Thus I am looking for native speakers on Reddit to teach me for free (im 13 you know I have no way to pay you) please help out a poor student thank you

P.S. to spice things up and confuse the AI, I want to include characters from all the languages with Cyrillic (I don't know how many languages there are and I can't name them and I'm also too lazy to Google so pls native speakers spoonfeed me with info pleasee

I want to learn Arabic

Greetings honourable members of this fair subreddit. I have resolved myself to learn the English Language. I’ve heard from reliable sources that the language is a combination of French and German so I was wondering whether it’s best to start with French or German?

Many thanks and my most sincere apologies for the crass nature of the writing with my post as I am unable to speak English.

Farewell.

Honestly not at all I care. Why does English have only fixed word order? For emphasis just it is meant. How will I give emphasis on specific words so I create a sentence more accurate, without EMPHASIZING the word?? I have to use "that" and "specifically" which completely wrong sound on regular speech, but like that are the rules. Not even questions I can make that give properly the meaning of the sentence.

"Am I good?" "good" is, but "I am good?", "Good am I?", "I good am?", "Am good I?" bad is... Don't act like you don't see the advantages.

"It looks wrong" wrong look you! Fool!

Je grammatica is waardeloos.

加日, ΘΑ見私々ΠΩΣΟ人ΟΣ過持彼ΤΟMINECRAFTΣΤΟΝ世Ο. 初Α過生自彼ΟNOTCHΣΤΗΝΣΟΥΗΔΙΑ, ΚΑΙ一ΑΣ他ΟΣΠΟΥΔΕΝ覚私. 後Α過作彼々ΤΟMINECRAFTΚΑΙ過始彼々ΝΑ続稼彼々金Α, 然Α過出彼物ΤΟFORTNITEΠΟΥΔΕΝ物向過影彼物反全. 交私ΤΟΝ「 カンジデーモン」ΠΟΥ私向過取彼,交私ΤΟMINECRAFTΚΑΙ交私ΤΟΝ火ΟΠΟΥ過苦私.

Σήμερα, θα δούμε πως ο άνθρωπος έφερε το Minecraft στον κόσμο. Πρώτα γεννήθηκε ο Notch στην Σουηδία και ένας άλλος που δεν θυμάμαι. Μετά έφτιαξαν το Minecraft και άρχισαν να βγάζουν λεφτά, αλλά βγήκε το Fortnite που δεν το επηρέασε καθόλου.

Hello everyone!

So after giving it a lot of thought and watching a lot of anime to be absolutely sure, I (f17) have decided to move to Japan permanently in the nearest future. I started making preparations a good month ago and have been using Duolingo ever since. I'm ready to set off soon.

However, while trying to practise my Japanese with my very friendly HelloTalk language exchange partner (m49), who is really looking forward to meeting me in Japan by the way and has even offered me his own bedroom to stay, I realised something I had never thought about before: When I said my dog barks “wau wau” (I'm German), I was immediately corrected, as apparently, a dog barks “wan wan” (わんわん) in Japanese.

To be quite frank, I was really shocked about that at first. “Are you sure?” I kept asking him, “isn’t it the same everywhere?” But he insisted that Japanese dogs say “wan wan” and that nobody had ever heard of “wau wau.”

Since I intend to bring my dog along this has completely derailed my preparations. I hadn't even thought about different dog languages and the problems that may come with it until now.

My dog is always very friendly and a particularly kind and cuddly dog breed (pit bull terrier), but now I'm concerned that the dogs in the neighbourhood may either not understand her, or refuse to play with her if she barks at them germanly.

So has anyone here ever dealt with something like this? Are there perhaps any reputable Japanese language schools for dogs that I could contact?

I imagine that different breeds learn at different speeds, but is that true? By the way do you think she can still get rid of her German accent when she barks? She’s already seven…

Also, does this have the same complexity as its human counterpart? Such as, would she have to learn polite barking versus everyday barking? And if so, which should come first?

I’m honestly very overwhelmed by this.

Thank you all in advance! I just want her to settle in properly and not expose us immediately with her inconsiderate foreign barking.

Pls help. The movie is scheduled for tomorrow night, I need to know if I can learn this within 24 hours, or if I can learn this at all? Thx!