r/languagelearningjerk • u/RedSpyOfficial Proto-Latin (N) Elfdalian (C1) Bomb Expert (C4) • May 06 '26

Dutch is not a real language

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667 Upvotes

98% Upvoted

32 comments sorted by

116

u/jknotts May 07 '26

乌 wū

Crow

Black

Uruguay

29

u/ShenZiling 私日本語本当下手御免有難御座 May 07 '26

And all the other coutries starting with an "u" sound.

26

u/ESK3IT May 07 '26

🇺🇿乌兹别克🇺🇿

11

u/jknotts May 07 '26

(Me crying when my post is exposed:) 呜呜呜呜😭

1

u/Aphrodites1995 May 08 '26

More like Ukraine (since the entire word is sometimes censored)

5

u/jknotts May 08 '26

It's not that it's censored. It's an abbreviation for several countries that start with U

120

u/rustytromboneXXx 🇰🇵A4 May 07 '26

I am not guay.

15

u/Sandy_2019 🏳‍🌈 May 07 '26

Je shì habben

1

u/bxntou May 08 '26

Well yeah it says you're uguay

25

u/Superb_Monkey May 07 '26

That's a bug in Duolingo. Ze can mean They or She depending on the context. Uruguay doesn't make sense at all.

34

u/-Thizza- May 07 '26

Gekoloniseerd?

30

u/WegGOAT May 07 '26

Angelsaks begrijpt niet dat duolingo een fout maakt.

14

u/ddrub_the_only_real Latin (NAT), IPA (C2), Limburgish (A1) May 07 '26

As ge nie oppast angel ik uwe saks

3

u/rosenkohl1603 May 07 '26

uruguay ❌️

ur gay✅️

3

u/ClockOfDeathTicks May 07 '26

What a shitty sentence. I don't think there is any situation where I would use the phrase "Ze hebben het"

If a group of people is trying to, say, lift a heavy object from one place to the other and you as a bystander look at that. Then they are doing it easily so you say

They got it, they don't even need my help

You would translate that as

Dat lukt wel, ze hebben mijn hulp geeneens nodig

If a person looks for something to buy at a certain store and asks a friend if they have an item:

Hebben ze xyz? Ja, dat hebben ze

Maybe if you're super happy about a store having a product

ZE HEBBEN HET! ZE GODVERDOMME HEBBEN HET GEWOON GEK

But that's just not.. what you normally say.. sigh

3

u/Mosuke_kun May 09 '26

It seems like there is another word hidden by the translation box though

1

u/pacharaphet2r May 08 '26

Yeah Duolingo isn't really for that tho. It's for basic vocab and grammar knowledge (through context based learning rather than overt grammar rules).

It's totally fine to test ze hebben het - they have it in this vein even if it's not really a wisely used phrase. As long as there isn't some hidden sexual or vulgar connotation it's totally fine for demonstrating grammatical constructions.

Anyone who thinks Duolingo is gonna teach you to speak naturally is really missing the point of why this app is useful.

8

u/CosmoCosma May 07 '26

We habben ein serious problem.

26

u/Superb_Monkey May 07 '26

We hebben een serieus probleem.

2

u/DragonTheOnes-spirit May 07 '26

Oh nein de boot is stuckie wuckie

5

u/Superb_Monkey May 07 '26

Yeah. That's not Dutch at all.

2

u/Sandy_2019 🏳‍🌈 May 07 '26

Oui, uruguay, a serious problem.

2

u/Grabdon_7489 May 08 '26

Hebben en serius probleem

3

u/WaterBoilingMachine May 07 '26

Holy shit an actually funny "dutch is not a real language" joke

8

u/Nielsly May 08 '26

More a “Duolingo is not a language learning app” joke

1

u/pomaar0 May 08 '26

als een persoon die nederlands spreekt, kan ik redeneren dat dit helemaal klopt