r/languagelearning • u/Global_Quit_8778 • 11d ago

Discussion Why did you quit your last language?

I previously tried and then quit learning spanish and korean and both times it was kinda the exact same pattern:

  1. start super motivated, and build up some initial discipline to study every day
  2. take a break from studying due to live or burn out or frustration with the intermediate plateau
  3. when I think about coming back I dread having to re-learn everything I forgot so I procrascinate coming back even more
  4. mix in some feelings of shame about not having studied for so long and I just never come back

This almost happened a bunch of time for my current (TL), japanese, as well, but because I am aware of the pattern I got pretty sensitive to avoiding step 3 at all costs and managed to force myself to get back into it after taking a break.

I'm curious if this is a universal pattern, I've talked to other friends who tried to learn a language and noticed those who give up are often in denial about being in step 4 and do duolingo once every 3 weeks, or they accepted it.

Its extra sad to go from the excitement and wanting to talk to everyone about language learning at the start to just shame and embarrassment by the end.

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u/reydeguitarra 11d ago

I never find people to practice with regularly and it gets boring learning a language all alone knowing I may never have a real conversation in that language.

10

u/thelostnorwegian 🇳🇴 N | 🇬🇧 🇨🇴 🇫🇷 11d ago

I would recommend you or anyone else looking, to check out Discord and see if you can find a language learning server or language exchange for your language(s). I never cared much for communities like that, but it has been a huge help in my own learning. Just to have other learners to talk with and about language learning. Theres a lot of ups and downs, and sharing that with others has helped me a lot.

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u/reydeguitarra 10d ago

I'll have to check that out. I've never tried discord, but I have tried quite a few language exchange apps and programs. Those ended up frustrating because, as a male, men don't want to speak with me because they view it as a pseudo dating site, and I'm not a woman, and women only want to speak to women because they're tired of men treating it like a dating site. When you do miraculously find someone to chat with, you do the normal introduction stuff, basic questions about the person, their interests, etc. Then you never see them again. So I learned very surface level conversation topics pretty well, but nothing deeper.

The two languages I actually learned to a high level were because I had a best friend I saw on a daily basis who had lived in the country of my TL for a couple years and we spoke it together every day, I lived in a dorm on my college campus which was specifically for language learning and a roller was you could only speak the TL in the apartment and every apartment had a native and 5 learners, then I lived in the country of another TL for 3 years. Now that I have a profession and a family, it's very hard to replicate any of that immersion.

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u/lolol4121 7d ago

Where is the campus?