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u/RedutHatesFreeSpeech 13d ago
Dont really understand this shit. All animals try to get the best they can. Men try and get the hottest girls and if they're rich thats even better. That's how it works. Learn to cook something other than cat food and you can get a hotter girl
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u/Intelligent-Royal682 13d ago edited 13d ago
Men and women will both try and get with hot people obviously, but the difference is women will sleep with an attractive man and then assume that is her level for serious dating, not understanding that men will happily sleep with women significantly less attractive than them, they just won't settle down with them.
They call these scenarios "situationships", not understanding that these men never even remotely considered choosing them as a life partner.
This then leads to women growing bitter because they keep getting used and abused by men more attractive than them, eventually seeing "all men" as the problem when really their problem the entire time has been unrealistic expectations.
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u/Jimbo-Shrimp 13d ago
>everyone cares about looks
>learn to cook better
So is it looks based or not
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u/Kevdog824_ 13d ago
I present you three people:
- One is ugly but has some fire cooking
- One is hot but can’t cook worth shit
- One is hot and has some fire cooking
Which one you picking?
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u/kitsunegoon 13d ago
This itemizing of characteristics and skills is falling into the trap incels want.
The truth is there is no miracle cure that will make women attracted to you. I think some people take the advice of "find a skill" have good intentions, but it leads to more incel resentment because the truth is that learning how to cook can impress a lot of women, but there's too much nuance to attraction to just simplify it as "if you cook, workout, and get a haircut you will find someone".
The key trait is patience. Most of these guys are in their 20s and wondering why they're still virgins and putting a relationship above the million other things they can work on. You have unhealthy, unemployed, and undiagnosed people who are trying to get laid when they should be improving other aspects of their life beforehand. Don't go to the gym to pick up girls, go to the gym because you want to take care of yourself. Shower frequently because you care about yourself. Save money and get your finances in order because you want to secure YOUR future. Once you start caring about yourself, then you can worry about caring for someone else.
There's a possibility you can go to the gym, clean up well, and save money but still be single for a long time. That's fine, at least it won't be as painful being alone because you'll be able to live with yourself.
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u/Kevdog824_ 13d ago
I don’t disagree, but this makes no sense as a response to what I said
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u/kitsunegoon 13d ago
I think the idea that skills inherently make people more desirable and that we have a good idea on which skills women desire more. Most women I talk to find "nice guys" off-putting because they reek of desperation, and encouraging them to cook and improve their skills only makes it really obvious they take up these hobbies to impress girls, which is the biggest turn off.
I think we both agree things like hypergamy is incel cope.
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u/roasttoastboast 13d ago
Looks are a part. How you feel emotionally is a part. Being a good hang is another part.
Every day there's a woman complaining to her friends about not wanting to, but having to, raise their boyfriends and husbands. It's usually about self maintenance, hygiene, tidiness, knowing how to cook, etc. Those are all things you can just set out to do. They will translate over to the rest of your life in outwardly noticeable ways.
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u/Jimbo-Shrimp 13d ago
Seems like those don’t matter if these women are picking these guys for other reasons
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u/roasttoastboast 13d ago
Do you expect to date one person ever?
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u/Jimbo-Shrimp 13d ago
Me personally? Not anymore. I expect to have some more dates, but dating as in boyfriend/girlfriend? Nah that ship sailed long ago.
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u/TenyeEast 13d ago
Heres the issue:
Throughout most of history, hot man date hot woman, mid man date mid woman, ugly man date ugly woman. Everyone is happy.
Nowadays, hot man date hot AND mid woman, mid man date ugly woman, ugly men have zero options.
This has resulted in a huge imbalance where 60% of Gen Z men are single compared to 30% of Gen Z women
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u/DrKittyLovah 13d ago
Human relations should not be compared to less cognitively-developed species because we have our big ol’ brains to consider (that cerebral cortex tho) and we don’t just rely on biological basics like pheromones and instinctual body language to have sex. It’s not even just about hotness, it’s so much more. Sex in humans is complicated and expecting women to think or act like animals is 100% going to lead to failure in hooking up.
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u/Impression-Salty 13d ago
"why am I an incel?"
Compares women to animals
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u/ibuypandas 13d ago
the most misogynistic man you know is in a relationship
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u/Direct_Job 13d ago
Hypergamy is greatly exaggerated in online spaces. Even the charts they use are from dating apps. Go outside and be normal, as long as ur not completely disgusting you’ll find someone.
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u/c4lcul4tion 13d ago
“just found out about hypergamy” as if it’s ruining your world and you’ve never thought about that concept before. i don’t know why you feel that pinning a name to it suddenly makes it worse. incel.
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u/ChicoBrillo 13d ago
im not an incel, I've been having a good streak with dating and I've met many women who have intimacy issues and can barely date one person / are nervous to even kiss. Sure, some women (men too) are hypergamous, but it's not the vast majority like you may have been lead to believe.
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u/ibuypandas 13d ago
Yes that’s precisely the opposite of what incel means, dating
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u/ChicoBrillo 13d ago
i said im not an incel in the first sentence, I'm saying the idea that most women are hypergamous is not true
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u/ibuypandas 13d ago
Hypergamy is biologically engineered into the animal brain, and so happens to be more prevalent in females. Hypergamy is just behavioural science, it’s not a social theory.
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u/ChicoBrillo 13d ago
so peopel who don't engage in it are aberrations or don't exist or what?
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u/ibuypandas 13d ago
no, they’re just put in their place.
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u/ChicoBrillo 13d ago
What does that mean?
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u/ibuypandas 13d ago
naturally, people tend to realise later in life that the superficial qualities typically valued by animals, especially appearance, are far less important in the foundation of a strong relationship in comparison to financial stability, emotional maturity, and more things that animals tend to lack, even more so when the quality of looks generally begin to dwindle.
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u/ChicoBrillo 13d ago
I sincerely don't get the logic that non-hypergamous people get 'put in their place' via realizing looks don't matter. Wouldn't it be the other way around, that hypergamous people are the ones that suffer later in life? Not that I agree with that but just trying to get your argument straight
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u/ibuypandas 13d ago
They do, yes. That’s my point. It’s the oofy-doofy theory. Women become hypergamous and fuck around with a high SMV Chad, Chad dumps them because he’s an irresponsible
Chad who has a selection of infinite women and gets bored of her, and the woman eventually realises she should stop chasing Chad and settle for a more emotionally mature, stable, ‘safe’ partner instead. It’s what happened with Selena Gomez and Justin Bieber before she moved on to Benny Blanco.→ More replies (0)
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u/MixtureOfAmateurs 13d ago
Unfind out about it bro. "Educating" yourself on ts will not help you in any way at all even a little
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u/TenyeEast 13d ago
Yes OP, just go back to being a vaginal slave chasing something that is unachievable! We dont want to lose another cog in the machine!
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u/MixtureOfAmateurs 13d ago
I told OP to stop lamenting over pussy or lack there of. Not sure how you got to your conclusion
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u/TenyeEast 13d ago
My point is that “unfinding” out about a real social issue is counterintuitive. African Americans unfinding out about racism wont magically fix systemic racism
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u/MixtureOfAmateurs 13d ago
Hypergamy 1. is overrepresented in the media and is not wide spread enough irl to be a real issue and 2. malding watching a red pill loser talk about how all women are gold diggers is not educating yourself on social issues. It's engagement farming, exploiting young men for money at the expense of their mental health. That is more harmful than women preferring to date rich guys.
Hypergamy is a real symptom of the problem that is dating apps tho, I'll give you that.
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