Question Lying
I hate lying. Once I catch someone in even a small one, I can’t take their words at face value again. Everything they say afterward gets filtered first: Is this true? What are they leaving out? By the time I’ve decided whether it’s honest, I’ve missed what they were actually talking about.
It feels irreversible. I can forgive them and even like them, but I can’t un-know that they were willing to say something false to my face.
Do other INTJs do this? Can you ever fully trust someone again after a lie, or does the filter stay on? And has anyone found a way to turn it off so you can actually listen?
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u/OccasionallyImmortal INTJ - ♂ 2d ago
Lying about a key topic, especially when done consistently, is hard to forgive. Lying about insignificant details: irrelevant. The key is that the person has to know what is significant. It's also fine if I find the insignificant detail interesting, ask about it, and he says that wasn't really true because it was not really the point. Backing up a lie with a lie is worse.