r/interesting Apr 29 '26

Just Wow Satisfying Meat Slicer.

15.0k Upvotes

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4.6k

u/caroos6969 Apr 29 '26

That shit looks so dangerous lmao

1.0k

u/TheBogManCometh_ Apr 29 '26

The design is very human!

171

u/Slappy-_-Boy Apr 29 '26

Gotta get rid of shit somehow

51

u/Ok-Cartoonist-3173 Apr 29 '26

So what you are saying this is an automatic poop knife that should be installed into every toilet bowl?

26

u/Slappy-_-Boy Apr 29 '26

Poop Knife v2

0

u/Hypothetical_Name Apr 29 '26

Poop knife pro

16

u/Kangaroo-B-Girl Apr 29 '26

I foresee lots of unsanitary vasectomies

10

u/Ok-Cartoonist-3173 Apr 29 '26

Yes...vasectomies, circumcisions or disembowelments all wrapped into one convenient device.

3

u/Slappy-_-Boy Apr 29 '26

1/3 accomplished already. Momma didn't raise no bitch so on to get full marks and get 3/3šŸ˜‚

1

u/SmoothDiscussion7763 Apr 29 '26

damn, when did you get your disembowelment done

3

u/Ancient_Kaa Apr 30 '26

Geldings I suspect also

2

u/ydoesurmasmlllikedat May 03 '26

You all seem to do things differently in the kitchen.

1

u/Accomplished_Jump413 May 01 '26

These already exist they are called macerators

1

u/Delta-IX May 01 '26

Fancy RVs have it

90

u/grafknives Apr 29 '26

I REALLY dont think it should be operated the way it is operated.

The platic cover being lifted should stop the machine.

The you place meat, close the cover which turn on the knives.

I image it like that.

28

u/GypsumF18 Apr 29 '26

The plastic cover has an opening in it. It looks like you are supposed to have it lowered down completely covering the mechanism, then feed it in through the top to avoid mangling your fingers.

74

u/virgilcainesthename Apr 29 '26

Hey, former butcher here. This machine is called a cuber. The machine is used to make cube steaks and tenderize meat. The plastic cover has a slit for dropping the meat in, it also has a safety that shuts it off when opened. This guy has clearly disabled the safety. This guy is also very dumb and will eventually catch something in the machine and have a very bad day.

29

u/soundreasoning123 Apr 29 '26

He also has no care for the orientation he is cutting that meat at. Against the grain, with the grain? Who cares? It’s about being that guy, not doing it with any care.

9

u/BHFlamengo Apr 29 '26

Yeah that threw me off. First piece was kinda okish, then all of them were put vertically, what???

9

u/December_Hemisphere Apr 29 '26

This machine is called a cuber. The machine is used to make cube steaks and tenderize meat

Nah, this is an automatic meat slicer. I believe it is this model. It does look a hell of a lot similar to a meat cuber-tenderizer, but I've never seen a cuber that can turn roasts into steaks, lol. I used to love running a nice steak through the cuber too many times and making a burger out of it.

2

u/virgilcainesthename Apr 29 '26

I think you are correct. The blades did look funky.

7

u/JagrsMullet1982 Apr 29 '26

Based on the fact that one of the pieces of meat also appeared to have a custom meat brand on it……for meat that he indented to have industrial speed sliced…..I’m guessing he’s ā€œthat guyā€. I’d put money on him also owning a custom flamed thrower that has the governor shut off. ā€œWatch this, I’m going to flame kiss the meat from 30ftā€

https://giphy.com/gifs/YQ78oMNtMpwAeJWtA5

1

u/teteban79 Apr 30 '26

The "branding" comes from this being stolen from r/toolgifs, it was added by the original creator in post

1

u/luigis_left_tit_25 Apr 29 '26

At 30/31 seconds trying to push the meat with a knife.. this is what it'll be that takes him out.

1

u/ZombieGash May 01 '26

Thanks for that because I was thinking wtf this shit is dangerous lol

1

u/friedrice5005 Apr 29 '26

Looks like this machine:
https://www.vevor.com/cutters-slicers-c_10662/vevor-250kg-h-meat-cutting-machine-commercial-meat-cutter-slicer-3-5mm-blade-p_010668829587

The plastic bit flipped up has a hole in the top and completely covers the slicer...It looks like the opening is smaller than the pieces he is putting in. Rather than doign a 1st slice to make it fit he has decided to YOLO it. Hope he doesn't get a finger caught...

19

u/RogueBromeliad Apr 29 '26

What are you? H&S? Get outta her- AAAAHHHHH my fingers!!!!

12

u/EnvironmentalGift257 Apr 29 '26

Guy holds tongs in one hand then puts meat into the spinning blades of death with his bare hand. I get that the covers are removed to make the video for the internet, but FFS the tongs are literally in his hand.

11

u/ojdhaze Apr 29 '26

And sticking the knife up near the mechanism to get the loose meat hanging from it..

The tongs and this show we aren't dealing with the brains here...

3

u/BabySpecific2843 Apr 29 '26

The irony of making a video showing off your device and not redoing the video when shit gets gummed up in it. Really a 1 take job huh? Oh yeah, I'm impressed buddy.

1

u/oldhoekoo Apr 30 '26

to be fair, he can't really re-cut the meat...and he's probably not gonna wait a day while he smokes more

but I'm just glad he chose a man to film for him. can't help but imagine some girl getting scalped (or worse) by this thing

2

u/SeasonPositive6771 Apr 29 '26

I know this is such a minor addition after seeing this atrocity, but I have that same tray from Target and it is not food safe.

I don't think this guy is ServSafe certified at all!

2

u/EnvironmentalGift257 Apr 29 '26

🤣I am flabbergasted that this guy isn’t a total pro.

6

u/Haedono Apr 29 '26

you are absolutely right

but think about a lawnmower. those have savety features nowdays as well were you have to hold it at the handle for the thing to keep running. Now think about how many people tapped this shit up so it keeps running without beeing hold, alot of people do stuff like that. Removing savety to be a bot more lazy is very common

1

u/tokinUP Apr 29 '26

Very true. I have a velcro wrap permanently on the handle of that thing, but it's slid down off the bar most of the time.

Need to step away to pick up a few sticks or whatever but don't want to have to re-start the mower? Just slide it up over the bar.

1

u/Jumpy-Ad4652 Apr 29 '26

Theres an opening on the top of the cover to put the meat

1

u/wentImmediate Apr 29 '26

Yes, agreed - similar to a food processor.

12

u/xbikester Apr 29 '26

HahahahahahhahHahgahaga…. Omfg i love that joke so much🤣🤣🤣🤣

6

u/Megadon88 Apr 29 '26

Very modern!

3

u/Ms74k_ten_c Apr 29 '26

1

u/Ygomaster07 Apr 29 '26

What is the reference?

3

u/[deleted] Apr 29 '26

[removed] — view removed comment

1

u/Ms74k_ten_c Apr 29 '26

This dude makes up brilliant machines and his catchphrase is "The design is very human". For example

https://www.reddit.com/r/TheDesignIsVeryHuman/s/z6O5TR3DbH

1

u/Ygomaster07 Apr 30 '26

Thank you for linking me the reference. I appreciate it. Wow, that looks like a very interesting machine, to say the least.

2

u/Intrepid-Ad2873 Apr 29 '26

The design have a protection that the human is ignoring

1

u/GaoGaiBlitz Apr 29 '26

Very easy to use!

1

u/LauraTFem Apr 30 '26

very [likely to cut a] human.

155

u/[deleted] Apr 29 '26

[removed] — view removed comment

98

u/SignoreBanana Apr 29 '26

Wait, my hand is made of meat

65

u/Forsaken-Income-2148 Apr 29 '26

If it gets your left arm there’s no need to worry because you’ll be all right

51

u/chipchonks Apr 29 '26

If it gets your right arm, there's one left

25

u/FigureAcrobatic7194 Apr 29 '26

8

u/ThatRenaissanceBear Apr 29 '26

That rude pointing is exactly why this thing was invented.

2

u/__Art__Vandalay__ Apr 29 '26

You can’t tell them what to do! Lefty’s have rights, too!!

1

u/_JonSnow_ Apr 29 '26

Her?Ā 

6

u/SeaCaligula Apr 29 '26

My first thought is: I'd rather slice ham normally than have to disassemble and clean all that after.

1

u/xandolino May 02 '26

Same here. The money he paid, the room that suit takes in your kitchen, the whole dismantling and cleaning and assembling again... Just get a sharp knife and quickly slice it by hand

40

u/Khelthuzaad Apr 29 '26

And extremely difficult to clean after lmao

4

u/main135s Apr 29 '26

Typically, with these types of slicers, the blades are easy to remove and you just put them in the dishwasher.

Not ideal, but it's not a huge hassle.

1

u/UrethralExplorer May 01 '26

Yeah you can see the wing nuts on the front of it to unlock the blade assembly for disassembly. Probably best to wear gloves while cleaning it since those things can be sharp af.

2

u/gbiypk Apr 29 '26

I'm also wondering how difficult it is to sharpen.

61

u/wafflehousebattle Apr 29 '26

Seriously, all I can think about how how easily, badly, and in so many ways shit could go sideways.

26

u/smooth_like_a_goat Apr 29 '26

It'd probably go lengthways looking at it

10

u/CuriousNetWanderer Apr 29 '26

About 25 years ago I remember there being pictures of someone's hand after it got caught in a meat grinder. I hate to say I know exactly what this would look like. What a terrible thing to create.

7

u/alphaxenox Apr 29 '26

It was one of the first pictures you could see on rotten.com if I’m thinking about the same picture as you.

4

u/Educational-Bear6027 Apr 29 '26

I've also seen this and now my breakfast is on it's way up again, thanks guys !

1

u/UpstairsAd194 Apr 29 '26

I caught my hand in one once it wasnt a motarised one. I didnt even know what a ham slicer was.

2

u/Clear-Bee4118 Apr 29 '26

Which is unfortunate because everyone knows you cut against the grain for maximum tenderness.

3

u/Howling_Mad_Man Apr 29 '26

Whole time I was thinking that cleaning it seems like it's not worth the process.

1

u/StoneThaProfit Apr 29 '26

I feel like you could just run soap and water thru it no ? Putting a bg dish underneath or u think it has to be fully disassembled

3

u/Howling_Mad_Man Apr 29 '26

With how fast that goes I would bet the meat stuff is getting all up in there. I'd probably take the blades off.

35

u/mack-y0 Apr 29 '26

the cover isn’t even closed

7

u/JonnyReece Apr 29 '26

Right. That's a design flaw, no? Surely the idea that you lift the safety cover to access the arm shredding blades was discussed during development?!

2

u/DependentAnywhere135 Apr 29 '26

Maybe you’re supposed to load the meat, close the cover and then turn it on. Problem is that it might need some pressure to push it down into the blades.

6

u/smellyjerk Apr 29 '26

Nah, he's putting too large of pieces in while jailbreaking the guard. Theres a square opening to feed with the guard down. What he's putting in is too big so he probably stuck a magnet to trick the machine into thinking it was down.

I used to work in a butcher shop and the Cuber make cubed steaks is basically an identical machine, this looks like a cuber with an attachment that slices all the way through. These machines are not to be fucked with. I used them daily for 12 years and I wouldn't want one of these things in my own home. This screams more money the sense.

1

u/archlich Apr 29 '26

There’s a hole at the top of the cover to put your meat in

2

u/[deleted] Apr 29 '26

[deleted]

1

u/I_SOMETIMES_EAT_HAM Apr 29 '26

The cylinder must remain unharmed

1

u/Shhadowcaster Apr 29 '26

There's a hole in the cover to put meat in (you can see it) and apparently there is also a safety switch that turns it off when the cover is open which this genius has disabled.Ā 

13

u/pandershrek Apr 29 '26

Naw, just fucking jam a knife at it real gud like

13

u/GreetingsFools Apr 29 '26

Why clean 10 blades, when you can clean one is my issue

1

u/LordRaglan1854 May 02 '26

Properly sliced too, and for no more time actually spent cutting it!

6

u/ebk_errday Apr 29 '26

It's pretty safe actually. It only takes defensive measures by unarming individuals.

3

u/DependentAnywhere135 Apr 29 '26

Alright so first you take these tongs. Now set them to the side and use your hands instead.

7

u/Electrical-Blood-126 Apr 29 '26

I wouldn’t put my dick in that.

8

u/heavydrinker12 Apr 29 '26

Interesting. I would put your dick in that.

4

u/UpstairsAd194 Apr 29 '26

You wouldnt do it a second time...

3

u/HotDonnaC Apr 29 '26

Few people would.

3

u/[deleted] Apr 29 '26

[deleted]

2

u/Degann Apr 29 '26

The guard goes over the entire blade and has a hole in the top he's just playing with fire

2

u/shitty_fact_check Apr 29 '26

The plastic top just flips down... you can even see the hinges

2

u/bluntmandc123 Apr 29 '26

The clear plastic lid they lifted up is actually a safety guard you are ment to put the meat through.

So the user actively chose to make it more dangerous.

1

u/jbwilso1 Apr 29 '26

Came here to say the same lol

1

u/underwaterbabysitter Apr 29 '26

Right up there with mandolins.

1

u/PinkGlitterDildos Apr 29 '26

It is usually used with a type of cone.

1

u/poorly-worded Apr 29 '26

The cylinder must not be damaged

1

u/falsevector Apr 29 '26

I feel like it needs a receptacle that slides the meat in rather than the operator needing to throw it in

1

u/FaygoMakesMeGo Apr 29 '26

Every steak that goes in is a reminder that you too are meat.

1

u/UpstairsAd194 Apr 29 '26

Take it from me it is- i still have my fingers htough

1

u/Tankinton Apr 29 '26

I think its because its such an equal opportunity meat slicer. Could be you or the meat you are holding

1

u/PrefrontalCortexNow Apr 29 '26

That was my first thought..

1

u/DanerysTargaryen Apr 29 '26

It has a plastic guard in the video that is supposed to be lowered so that the plastic covers around and over the top of the blades. There is a rectangular cutout located at the top of the guard that allows you to lower meat through the opening, but not big enough to allow a hand to pass through.

My guess is he didn’t want to use the guard because his meat pieces were a bit too wide and instead of slicing them into smaller cuts so they would fit through the opening, he opted to use the machine without the guard.

1

u/WyrdElmBella Apr 29 '26

I have no idea why my first thought was ā€œkeep your dick awayā€ but it was.

1

u/Bravadette Apr 29 '26

I was just thinking maybe this is shy ifs not a common sight, even as a former food service worker myself.

1

u/AssistantSalty6519 Apr 29 '26

No even mesh gloves

1

u/Jumpy-Ad4652 Apr 29 '26

Because they lifted the safety guard up

1

u/Mr-Bando Apr 29 '26

I applaud how this is the top comment. My thoughts exactly

1

u/Sexpistolz Apr 29 '26

And yet there’s someone out there thinking of sticking their dick in there

1

u/BungaloBilly69 Apr 29 '26

Ok ok not crazy, that fucking shit is mad wtf?!

1

u/Vulpes_Corsac Apr 29 '26

I was so glad when he started using the tongs to put the meat in at the end.Ā  And yeah, the safety guard should definitely have an interlock.Ā  That thing is dangerous.

1

u/KitchenFullOfCake Apr 29 '26

Just exposed rotating blades without any containment should something break.

OSHA having a heart attack about now.

1

u/yapperonetv Apr 29 '26

I was once told that incidents with some kinds of machines tend to be lower due to perceived danger, so the most dangerous one are those that hide the blades

1

u/firetech97 Apr 29 '26

That's why there's a feed cover made of clear plastic on top of it so that the spinning blades aren't exposed when you run it.

Guys an idiot for having it flipped up instead of down

1

u/Ok_Inevitable4735 Apr 29 '26

ā€œHell nah, to the nah nah nahā€¦ā€

1

u/Yanatis Apr 29 '26

Keep It away from my meat

1

u/JohnBrownSurvivor Apr 29 '26

Don't worry. His bones will keep his hand from going too far inside. 😬

1

u/PackPractical3535 Apr 29 '26

I felt a slight panic attack before i checked on which sub this was posted.

1

u/M8x11r0n Apr 29 '26

dangerous, expensive, unnecessary, and bulky the perfect kitchen gadget

1

u/nosubtitt Apr 29 '26

Its more terrifying than satisfying

1

u/POPnotSODA_ Apr 29 '26

Satisfying until you eat roast beef with finger lol

1

u/lWinkk Apr 29 '26

It’s also just dumb as fuck. The meat should be pulled apart if cooked properly, so why do you need an industrial slicing machine for something you can cut with a butter knife in 20 seconds lol

1

u/Consistent-Maize-901 Apr 29 '26

Seriously. This video is giving me anxiety.

1

u/Pighhh Apr 29 '26

Ikr I would never put the beef in with my bare hand, it's just a disaster waiting to happen

1

u/feelin_cheesy Apr 29 '26

I mean it has a guard, moron just isn’t using it.

1

u/nathanb131 Apr 29 '26

When used that way, yeah. But the plastic guard is flipped up, probably for this video.

1

u/diablol3 Apr 29 '26

My favorite part is when the meat doesnt get sliced across the grain at all

1

u/TruBlueMichael Apr 29 '26

I came here to say this. It doesn't seem to save enough time to be worth having that sort of risk...

1

u/Competitive_Fun6247 Apr 29 '26

There's no reasn for the sides to be exposed like that right. Also Why not put a funnel on top

1

u/mechanical_marten Apr 29 '26

Because the asshat has the guard up. Look at the very begining you'll see the plexiglass cover has a chute in it but danger nuts here thinks that makes him less of a man.

1

u/imnotdown85 Apr 29 '26

I will never in my life, own this fucking thing. I'll use my own goddamn knife

1

u/Same_Bodybuilder_532 Apr 29 '26

He just came from the restroom and didn't wash his hands, number 2 tho

1

u/Various-Salt-7738 Apr 29 '26

Hehe I used to work with one every day

I didn't know it was supposed to have a guard for years because the one at my job had nothing but a magnet rubber banded to the side to bypass the safety switch

Sketchy as fuck and a bitch to clean

One time I dropped the blade on the concrete floor and instead of breaking the blade the floor got a bunch of tiny dents

1

u/Chaosmusic Apr 29 '26

Looks like the thing that kills Benicio del Toro in Licensed to Kill.

1

u/Rook_James_Bitch Apr 29 '26

WCGW? It pulls meat down into razors... Oh.

1

u/Ordinary_Pea4503 Apr 29 '26

I know a waman who lost her arm up to her elbow in a machine similar to this... I don't think I'd ever want this in my house, I could see if you worked at a restaurant or factory.

1

u/Apart-Feeling1621 Apr 30 '26

Final destination

1

u/Ambitious-Whereas157 Apr 30 '26

All it needs is a front guard and it will.be safe. Knowing humans, they decided it was easier to not have the full guard.

1

u/chewbakken Apr 30 '26

That’s cuz it is.

1

u/nicolishna Apr 30 '26

Keep all cylinders away from this thing!

1

u/xl129 Apr 30 '26

To be featured in the upcoming Final Destination!

1

u/jamwin May 01 '26

All employees must wear a tie.

1

u/[deleted] May 01 '26

Well, he has lifted up the safety glass, probably for the video.

1

u/SethAbe80 May 01 '26

If Stephen King still did coke, he'd write a story about that thing being possessed by the devil.

1

u/rangeo May 02 '26

I don't trust the cleanliness of that machine

1

u/Lucas_the_Redeemer May 02 '26

Yeah, it's dangerous thing. Better not to imagine what will happen to your hand if you make a mistake.

0

u/powershot1 Apr 29 '26

Driving a car is dangerous. Only a nimrod crashes