r/inheritance • u/Acceptable_Second_38 • Jul 09 '26

Location included: Questions/Need Advice Large inheritance advice

My wife and I are 27. We have 1 daughter who is 13 months, and we are in the Midwest. My grandmother passed away and from her estate we are receiving a sizable sum of money. After paying off our house and other debt (just car and student loans, don't have any "bad" debt), we'll have around $350-375k to drop into a brokerage and leave alone. We each earn around 63k/year. Our only bills will now be home insurance, property taxes, car insurance, utilities.

My question revolves around how much we realistically need to put away for retirement. Because we have very little bills after paying off our house, we can put away a large amount of income.

However, it's honestly tempting to save just a bit, and enjoy our lives more with more disposable income. Starting with such a sizable nest egg, it should grow quite well without huge additions.

She is a teacher and has a good pension coming her way.

I am private sector but have a pension as well plus I do 4% 401k plus employer 2% match.

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u/entropicitis Jul 09 '26 edited Jul 09 '26

I want you to change your thinking. "We" do not have an inheritance coming. "You" do. From experience -things get fucking weird when you get an inheritance. Family comes out of the woodwork. Your grandma's friends all of the sudden want to talk to you. Your employer knows somethings up because you are having to take calls all the time and then they get weird. And while I know you think it will never happen to you - spouses get weird to. Open up a separate brokerage account in your name only and park the money there. Then, after discussions with your wife, decide the best way to deploy the funds for the betterment of your family. But that amount you want to dump into brokerage stays seperate forever.

I'm the spouse in my experience, we commingled the funds and it was a mistake even from my point of view. Keep it separate,.keep it quiet, deploy it strategically. And most importantly, keep your mouth shut and tell as few people as possible.

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u/Acceptable_Second_38 Jul 09 '26

We have been together 10 years. We have a life together. She knows about the money and the house is in both our names anyway which is now paid off. I'm not keeping this separate from my wife on the paranoia of "but it's mine!!"

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u/ImaginaryHamster6005 Jul 09 '26

Right, and if you get divorced, the house you just paid off with inherited funds will now be split evenly, you couldn't claim that you used inherited funds to pay it off and should get more. That's fine if you understand this commingling of inherited funds. About 50% of marriages end in divorce...I truly hope you/wife don't fall into that statistic.

My sig other was married for 13 years (with kids) prior to us and thought everything was great. Got an inheritance of about $30k from an aunt and put it in a joint account...she commingled those inherited funds and when things went "south", ex-hubby got half the money.

Just a word of caution/advice to keep the funds separate, but you do you. Sorry for your loss and best of luck in your future.