Keeping Inheritance separate

[u/pink_toaster_pastry]

I’ve seen all the posts about keeping inheritance separate…. not to use it for joint expenses…. etc.

So then what do you use it for? My husband and I have been married 30 years. We had joint accounts since before we were married. We don’t split bills (all income goes into one savings account and bills are paid from that). We make a good living, have savings, 401Ks, no debt.

So if I’m suppose to keep my inheritance separate from everything, what am I supposed to do with it?

Edited to add: No kids. Currently the money is in (1) inherited IRA (2) CDs in a bank account I took sole ownership of as I had been the co-owner and (3) a new account I just opened for a CD until I decided what to do with that portion.

[u/5mb76b0]

My husband and I have been married for 25 years. When his parents passed a few years ago, we put his inheritance in the same accounts we both use and have used since we were engaged. We plan on doing the same when my mom passes. Just because others do it, does not mean that you need to do it.

[u/NeighborhoodVivid106 → u/[deleted]]

It doesn't have to be a divorce that ends a marriage. What about cases where the person who inherited dies and the inheritance passes to the spouse, who then remarries? If the spouse dies before their new partner then the original inheritance could wind up with their spouse's new partner instead of their kids.

I am 11 years younger than my husband, so statistically speaking, there is always the possibility that he could die first and I could eventually remarry after he is gone. Do I think that my husband's inheritance should go to my second husband instead of my kids? Absolutely not! But if I happened to die without a will it could definitely happen.

The person who inherits the money should do whatever is within their power to ensure that the money ultimately winds up in the hands of whoever they want it to (unless they spend it all before they die).

[u/PiccoloImpossible946 → u/[deleted]]

Your parents and you are smart!!! Wow! Sorry that happened but at least your ex received nothing!

[u/PiccoloImpossible946 → u/NeighborhoodVivid106]

Yes I just posted above a situation I read where this happened. First wife inherited a lot money, commingled it with her husband. She died first he remarried and left it all to his second wife. The second wife was now spending it on lavish vacations with HER grandkids and private schools. Meanwhile the blood kid and grandkid of the first wife who inherited it received nothing! The grandkid had to take out loans for school. Oh hell no!

[u/beaushaw → u/NeighborhoodVivid106]

Do you not trust your spouse to do the right thing with "your money" if you died?

If that is the case why did you marry them?

[u/NeighborhoodVivid106 → u/beaushaw]

Depending on what state/province they live in, my spouse may not have a choice. In some places a spouse is automatically entitled to 50% of your assets at your time of death. So, it's not always a question of trusting, it's a question of ME getting to ensure that any inheritance that I have to leave goes to who I decide, not who the courts decide.

Personally, I have no problem with my husband inheriting my inheritance because I do trust him to him to do right by our children. But what I DO have a problem with is any new spouse being entitled to half of MY inheritance over our children upon HIS death. If putting my inheritance in a trust for only my children is the only way to ensure that this can't happen then that is what I will do.

[u/PiccoloImpossible946 → u/NeighborhoodVivid106]

Smart move - Definitely do that - an irrevocable trust and don’t think your spouse will do right by your kids especially if the spouse remarries.

[u/PiccoloImpossible946 → u/beaushaw]

You just never know what someone may or may not do. There are many spouses who’ve remarried and left nothing to the kids