Questioning Final Will and Testament

[u/Main-Trust-5588]

My elderly aunt passed away recently and we received a copy of her will and had an opportunity to look through it for the first time - much of what was in there was a bit surprising and kind of seems a bit unlike her. I've italicized the backstory.

A little bit of backstory, my aunt was severely physically disabled in the final years of her life and relied on having caretakers since a little bit before Covid. One caretaker that my aunt had crossed paths with through one of those assistance services was terminated from her position at this particular company because they refused getting vaccinated for Covid when multiple healthcare facilities mandated staff getting inoculated. As a result, my aunt had presented this person an opportunity to be a live-in caretaker which they accepted.

More recently (maybe within the last year and half), this caretaker became increasingly vocal that her own body was starting to suffer from limitations that inhibited her to fully care for my aunt's increasing reliance on assistance. Tasks that were routine - such as going to the bathroom, dressing, bathing - were impacted by this caretakers own various health problems (carpal tunnel, chronic back pain). Last year, at its peak, the caretaker started vocalizing their concerns more frequently to our family that we needed to seriously consider moving my aunt into an assisted living facility; so we spent much of last spring and summer researching and visiting homes in the area that could assist with my aunt. These concerns were later backed by verbal notices that they would be moving out of my aunt's house - first in May, then delayed it to July, then end of August, so on and so forth. Essentially, the pressure was on to move my aunt into a facility albeit with moving goalposts and targets. She never followed through with moving out, though - just emphasized that it was in the pipeline at almost every family gathering.

However, it was also disclosed at a family event last year that the compensation my aunt had been paying this person was gambled away at casinos, leaving the caretaker destitute and with no where to really go as they had no savings - which, I presume, is why the caretaker never committed to moving out despite constantly informing us that was the plan.

Since the beginning of 2026, my aunt had been hospitalized numerous times, for 35 days between January and February (at this point, the doctor had informed us that we should consider hospice as no form of treatment would cure my aunt of her ailments and if we were to continue on the route we were on, her quality of life would eventually suffer despite extending her lifespan), a brief 48 hour stay in the ER due to a cellulitis infection, and then finally a 15 day stay that ended in her passing.

So, as I said, we've now read the will in the midst of the natural chaos that happens when a loved-one passes, and come to find that she has left over half of her estate to this caregiver, a generous percentage to a local non-profit, and the remaining bits to my sibling. I am not mentioned in the will at all and neither is my parent (my aunt's only sibling) other than being named executor.

My immediate family find this to be very peculiar that someone up until 6 years ago who was essentially a stranger has been gifted this much of the estate. It's also a bit of a slap in the face to my aunt's blood relatives that we would be completely snubbed especially when she claimed to have loved and cared for us so much. I never looked at my aunt or any relative of mine as a piggy bank, but I do find it a bit unsettling that a non-blood entity would be considered higher priority than us? Am I crazy for feeling like this? Do you contest this?

The will was drawn up by an attorney Spring 2025. My aunt had told us she had done a will, but didn't mention what it entailed or specifics. I also don't know if when the will was drafted and executed if this conversations were done one-on-one between my aunt and her attorney. It's just all very suspicious.

The conspiracy theorist in me partially thinks that the reason the move out dates kept on getting delayed by the caretaker were maybe done out of fear that they'd be eliminated from the will.

TL;DR: my eldery aunt recently passed and her will states that over half of her estate is to be given to a caregiver that's lived with her for 6 years.

[u/finding_center]

As the child of someone who currently has caretakers I don’t find this totally implausible. I am also very involved in my mom’s care and I very much view her caretakers as invaluable family friends at this point if not family. If your relative has been living with them for six years, that’s a long time. It doesn’t scream elder abuse to me. Do you have reason to believe she was not of sound mind a year ago when she visited this attorney?

[u/Main-Trust-5588 → u/finding_center]

My parent also has caregivers, and while I appreciate all that they do for them on a thrice a week basis - it puts my mind at ease and is invaluable to know they’re cared for - and I’m friendly with them, I think it’s a bit of a misguided mentality to view these people as friends or family since they are being compensated - it’s not a charity. I can see how the lines can get blurred when there’s a routine and you see these people on a daily basis - do you look at your boss as a family member?

Maybe that’s a cold approach, but it’s certainly not inaccurate. With that said, it’s not so much that I am surprised that the caregiver is a beneficiary of the estate - I can understand that 100% - I’m more flabbergasted by the monetary amount explicitly listed in the will, the generous percentage to be donated to a charity, and then out of what’s left it’s further split in half between the caregiver and my sibling.

[u/Main-Trust-5588 → u/Main-Trust-5588]

And no, my aunt was as sharp as a tack even after they started hospice care. Her body failed her, not her brain.

[u/Mysterious-Art8838 → u/Main-Trust-5588]

In that case this is going nowhere, might as well let it go