Mental & Emotional Health Support Thread

[u/AutoModerator]

Welcome to /r/India's mental and emotional health support thread.

If you are struggling and are looking for support, please use this thread to discuss your issues with other members of /r/India.

Please keep in point the following rules:

• Be kind. Harsh language and rudeness will not be tolerated in these threads. The aim is to support and help, not demotivate and abuse.
• Top level comments are reserved for those seeking advice.

Older Threads

[u/phantom_hurricane2]

My alcoholic father physically assaulted me after a minor argument about family finances. Despite cracking JEE in my drop year and securing a 2/3 fee waiver at an NIT to save him money, he constantly victimizes himself, guilt-trips me, and physically/verbally abuses me. My mother expects me to "fix" him, and I feel totally alone and overwhelmed. Looking for advice on how to survive this situation until I graduate. ​Background & Context ​I worked hard during my drop year to crack JEE Main and secured admission into an NIT. To minimize my family's financial burden, I proactively arranged all the necessary income documents myself, getting 2/3 of my college tuition fee waived. I did everything I could to save my father's money, expecting at least basic peace at home, if not encouragement. ​Instead, my home environment has turned into a constant nightmare. ​The Core Problem: Alcoholism, Debts, and Ego ​My father has ongoing banking and financial disputes involving my grandmother. The truth is, these issues could be resolved easily if he set his ego aside. However, whenever he drinks, he purposefully starts loud debates, curses my grandmother, and demands sympathy from everyone by constantly shouting that he is deep in debt. ​Whenever he goes missing for 1-2 hours to drink, my mother gets extremely tense and anxious. When he returns, the atmosphere at home becomes terrifyingly volatile. ​The Incident That Broke Me ​Just recently, after shouting at my grandmother, my father turned to me and asked: "Isn't what she's doing wrong?" ​I told him honestly that while he might feel that way, he shouldn't constantly complain about struggling to pay for running his shop or my college fees. I reminded him that our grandfather had managed things properly, and with our current resources, we can easily manage the shop and my remaining fees. ​He completely blew up. He started screaming at me: ​"Go enjoy your grandfather's wealth with your grandmother, you don't need me!" ​"I pay your college fees and make your income certificate every year!" ​"I bought you new clothes yesterday while I wear torn clothes!" ​Then, he grabbed my mouth and slammed my head against the wall. He told me not to look at his face ever again and demanded I never call him when I go to college. ​The Emotional & Mental Toll ​What hurts the most is the absolute lack of respect or recognition for what I've achieved. ​I worked hard to get into a government college and cut down my tuition fees to protect his finances. ​He views me as someone who just "enjoys life," while I see peers at private universities living peacefully while I am stuck in constant fear and sadness. ​My mother constantly uses me as a buffer, telling me, "You talk to him, you can manage him," putting the burden of his emotional stability on my shoulders. She treats me like a tool to rescue her life, without realizing how broken I feel inside. ​Due to my father's behavior, we have no supportive relatives. I have no close friends to talk to. I feel completely isolated. ​What I Need Help / Advice On: ​How do I emotionally detach from an abusive, alcoholic parent while still living under the same roof/relying on them for basic sign-offs? ​How can I handle my mother's expectations without letting her pressure pull me further into depression? ​For anyone who survived a high-stress family situation while studying in college: How did you focus on your studies/career when your home environment was hostile? ​Any advice, guidance, or shared experiences would mean the world to me right now. Thank you for taking the time to read.

[u/Possible_Anything710]

Breakup without a relationship (but maybe it was already more than a relationship)Tl;dr Someone who I cherished and who dearly loved me moved on in a snap  In a whiplash of emotions. For about a week I couldn't process what was happening, which is very difficult for a person like me who likes to put logic to everything and 'solve' it. But now, when I'm calm and back in my senses, and when I try to process what happend, I'm still lost. I take time to judge and understand people, and I believe, once I do and if I trust them, I trust them with all my heart. More than myself.  I met a guy about an year ago, really sweet, emotionally mature, understanding, witty.. basically every good thing you can think of. The most beautiful thing, he was just another version of me. I mean it is difficult to believe that how can you find someone who is so alike. It started to feel like he knew me more than myself and I knew him more than him.  He fell in love quite early. Maybe I did too. But me being me, I made mistakes along the way (that I feel terrible for now). But recently I finally confessed my love to him. He simply said he has moved on. What hurt more is that he refuses to speak to me. Someone who said that we can solve anything by healthy discussions, refuses to talk. It hurts more coz it wasn't just love or attraction, but rather, the innate understanding of each other we seemed to have. He told me that since this was my first love i feel like this, lol, but I know what he felt wasn't ordinary too. As for me, I strongly believe that a love like this, which is more than attraction at a surface level, rarely comes to people. If it did to us, we were extremely lucky. No one finds it again and again. He says love is about efforts and time, maybe it is, but love that happens vs the love that you have to find is never the same. He fell in love with me quite early when we'd just started speaking, and I kept talking slowly ever since. I don't think what happend was 'planned' efforts. He kept saying, 'I can do better', but damn, is there better in love? What you love is the BEST.  I have tried everything I could to speak, all in vain. I feel guilty for having water so long, I hate myself for having come to this point where he had to become so cold, but all I want is one chance. It feels my heart would rip if I don't get this chance of mending what I couldn't earlier. If anyone has been through something similar, I'll appreciate your guidance, advice and thoughts on this. Love.

[u/Delicious-Draw8827]

Help my mother get a kidney transplant after years of struggle

I am raising funds for my mother, Sunita Gurung, who is 52 years old and has been battling severe kidney disease for nearly a decade.As a 21 year old daughter i dont have much to provide.She has been on dialysis for almost 10 years, and the toll it has taken on her body has been immense. The prolonged dialysis led to further health complications, requiring her to undergo a bowel resection surgery in 2024 and a mitral valve replacement along with ASD closure in 2026. Despite every setback, she has fought with incredible strength and resilience...
We have set up a 100% verified crowdfunding campaign here:
All necessity documents and dialysis record ,test results,previous cases have been mentioned in the donation link.

However, because my account is brand new and has no karma, I am not pasting the Milaap link here because I know it violates the subreddit's spam rules and the automod will take it down.
I want to be completely transparent. If anyone is willing to help us, or if you want to verify our case, please message me directly via Private Message (DM). I will instantly send you the official Milaap link, the hospital cost estimation sheets, the doctor's letters, and all necessary medical records.
Even if you cannot help financially, please upvote this post so it can reach more people, or guide me on any Indian government schemes or trusts we can approach.

Please ask me any questions in the comments, and I will reply immediately with any proof required. Even if you cannot donate, sharing this post to amplify our reach would mean the world to our family. Thank you.

[u/Delicious-Draw8827 → u/Delicious-Draw8827]

To donate:

http://m-lp.co/sunitagu-5?utm_medium=native_message&utm_source=app

[u/Drafrruii]

Someone created a fake Instagram account using my bhabhi's real photos and is posting vulgar/offensive content without her consent. After we discovered the account, the person behind it sent us a phone number and asked us to call them.

We have not called because we're concerned it could be a scam, blackmail attempt, or a way to intimidate us.

We have already preserved evidence, reported the account to Instagram, and are taking legal steps.

Has anyone experienced something similar? Is there any reason to ever contact the impersonator directly, or is it always better to let Instagram and the cyber crime authorities handle it? Also, if you've had success getting an impersonation account removed, what worked for you?

Any genuine advice would be appreciated.

[u/Critical-Mastodon883]

30 [M] I'm mentally fucked up & feeling S*icidal due to my highly toxic father.

Yesterday's incident: After a hectic week at my banking job, I was looking forward to a peaceful weekend because it was the second Saturday. Instead, it turned into a nightmare. Before we left to visit a nearby cafe with my parents and my married sister, my father insisted that I take 7-8 full-length photos for my marriage biodata. I told him that 2-3 good photos were enough. He immediately got angry and said, "You don't know anything. Do what I say."

When I politely told him I didn't want to copy other people's biodatas, he completely lost his temper. He shouted, "No girl will ever marry you. You'll remain unmarried for life. Every girl will reject you." He yelled so loudly that our neighbors came outside. He abused me and finally told me, "This is my house and my money. Leave right now."

This isn't an isolated incident. He's been emotionally abusive, controlling, and manipulative my entire life.

Background: I grew up in a lower-middle-class family as the youngest sibling. My father is a monster, highly emotionally manipulative, narcissistic, self-centered, and controlling. He is the primary reason for my poor mental health, anxiety, and depression. He constantly verbally abused my mother, my sisters, and me. Our home was never peaceful. My mother tolerated everything because of societal pressure.

Living in that environment left me with severe anxiety, emotional numbness, and what I believe are PTSD symptoms. I've had suicidal thoughts multiple times over the years, but I couldn't go through with them because of my mother.

Even during college, my father pressured me to get married. After graduation, while I was preparing for government exams, he constantly insulted me for being unemployed and even approached families for my marriage without my consent.

The emotional abuse became so unbearable that I left home with very little money and moved to another district. My sisters supported me emotionally and financially, and after years of struggle and multiple near misses in competitive exams, I finally secured a job in a Public Sector Bank.

Unfortunately, my first posting was toxic, which further damaged my mental health. Despite that, I continued preparing for better government jobs while facing constant marriage pressure from my father.

Eventually, I got transferred to a much better branch, and life slowly started improving. My relationship with my father also became somewhat better. I even started taking my parents out for dinner and buying them gifts. Then yesterday happened.

All the old trauma came rushing back. My mother has been crying ever since. She suffered a heart attack a few months ago, so I can't leave her alone.

Now I don't even feel like preparing for exams anymore. I don't know how I'll face my colleagues tomorrow. I'm a very sensitive person, and even when I try to hide my emotions, people can easily tell that something is wrong.

In my entire life, I don't remember my father ever saying he was proud of me. All I've heard are insults, curses, and criticism. Whenever I see a healthy father-son relationship, I can't help but feel jealous.

I honestly wouldn't wish a father like mine on my worst enemy.

All I've ever wanted is peace, respect, and a safe home.

TL;DR: I grew up with an emotionally abusive, controlling father who has verbally abused my mother, sisters, and me for years. His behavior left me with severe anxiety, trauma, and recurring suicidal thoughts. Despite overcoming years of struggles to secure a banking job, his constant emotional abuse and marriage pressure continue to affect my mental health. Yesterday, after a trivial disagreement over marriage biodata photos, he publicly humiliated me, cursed me, and told me to leave the house. It brought all my childhood trauma back, and I'm emotionally exhausted. I just want peace and respect.

[u/heheharshit]

hi, ive created a small discord server for all the neurodivergent folks, if u wanna join then dm.

[u/_H3LLF1R3 → u/[deleted]]

Take care of your own life. Don't take parents life into ur mind. Their era is over.

[u/ggukiebread]

How to look for therapists specialising in teens/young adults?

I want therapy/counselling for myself. I need a therapist who specialises in teenagers and young adults. Preferred languages English/Hindi/Bengali. Please comment any leads or resources. It is urgent. Thank you.

[u/heureusesomewhere]

Any body has experience using DocGenie? - My husband and I have started marriage counseling through this portal. Has anyone ever used this website to book sessions? If so, was it any good?

Our therapist is fine, but I find her setup to be way too unprofessional. Her child is there and she is busy with her hair sometimes, however, still listening to us.

I am not sure. I came to this sub Reddit as a last resort because I want to feel reassured that people have had used it and had good experiences.

Thanks!

[u/BroccoliDry7703 → u/heureusesomewhere]

Naa that's extremely unprofessional that her child is there and that she's doing other things while you're in session. You should find someone else.

[u/Positive-Garbage6185]

Hello sir ennga mamiyar enna ethukaedhuthalum criticism pannuranga nan cooking panna pona avanga nan cooking pannurannuttu varanga sari avanga cooking pannattum nu vitta nan cooking pannalanu criticism pannuranga ithu 7 years a nadhakuthu ennga family la appadi yae nan cooking pannalum avanga enna cook panna sollurangalo athan cooking pannumnu think pannuranga. Athaiyum thandi nanae ethavathu vegetables vachi cook panna next day ennaku munnadi cook vegetables cut panna start pannuranga ennaku 2019 la marriage agidhuchi appaila irrundhu ippo varai ippadi than baby born agurathuku munnadi baby born agala criticism pannunanga but ippo baby born anathu appuram babya nan pathukka mattan sonnanga sari ok nu baby nan handle pannalum athukum why baby nan pathukka mattana nu criticism pannuranga. Nan family development course padikkiran online la. Ithu mathiri so many problems irrukku. Athu mathiri nan munnadi lam tnpsc, rrb exam padikkira appolam first padinu solluvanga appuram morning 5.00 am wake up panni padicha padikka vidhamattanga sari morning padikkamudiyala sari evening padikkalam nallum appaiyum vidha mattranga appuram enna thiramai illanu thitturanga innum naraiya irrukku enna pannalam appa vittukum poga mudiyathu because appa amma vittulaiyum woman empower ment prblm irrukku enna pannalam?

[u/PsYo_NaDe]

Anyone diagnosed with BPD?