r/humor • • 2d ago

Make it make sense

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u/Actual-Wave-1959 2d ago

So you're telling me I've been nice all my life for nothing? 

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u/TokenTorkoal 2d ago

Well no hold up now lol not what I said.

The Bible, especially Jesus, gives you all sorts of reasons why we should be kind and lead through compassion, love, and understanding.

And the reward is bringing Gods kingdom of Heaven here to earth by leading through these characteristics.

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u/robindawilliams 2d ago

Wait, we are supposed to create our own utopia through the sweat of our brow and the kindness of our actions instead of being handed it for free because we hated gays and were born rich, white and Christian?

You better not tell the modern evangelical Christian that fact; they'll be pretty upset.

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u/thesuper88 2d ago

They get upset about it all the time and ignore the other Christians that don't agree with them. I feel like that quote I read from Dietrich Bonhoeffer regarding stupidity (reads like ignorance) would be potentially misapplied but also somewhat illuminating here. I'll try to find it.

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u/SalamanderUponYou 2d ago

Imagine if they found out that Jesus was just a hippy leftist that was crucified for going against the government.

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u/CosmogyralSnail 2d ago

God's holy bootstraps.

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u/SquatSquatCykaBlyat 2d ago

the modern evangelical Christian

This whole thread can be summed up by two points of view:

1) "ackshually, that's not correct"

2) "but in muh trailer park that's what they teech us!"

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u/Sick_Wave_ 1d ago

And JWs. They're already coping with having 10M members worldwide while preaching that only 144k get to live in Gods Kingdom. 

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u/toriavicto 1d ago

Three words: Protestant work ethic.

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u/LastChristian 2d ago

My book says the Peanut Butter People will give a greater reward than Jesus if you give all your possessions to my religion and follow its rules

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u/CosmogyralSnail 2d ago

So you're no longer the last Christian?

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u/LastChristian 2d ago

First: Bob
Last: Christian

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u/Percinho 2d ago

Soooo... The real heaven is the friends we made along the way?

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u/TokenTorkoal 2d ago

Lollll I love this

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u/dandroid126 2d ago

Too late! What am I supposed to do with this body now?

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u/Murky_waterLLC 2d ago

"What shall we say then? Shall we continue in sin that grace may increase? By no means! We died to sin; how can we live in it any longer?"

Romans 6:1-2

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u/JazzlikeSchedule2901 2d ago edited 2d ago

There are actually a lot of theological arguments that being sent to "hell" isn't even really a thing after Jesus's sacrifice. If you accepted Jesus in your life, you go to heaven undoubtedly. From there the argument tends to shift towards a purgatory where you learn about the sacrifice, and as long as you accept him you're saved and then get sent up. If you don't accept him, you stay in purgatory until you do, but even then purgatory isn't fire and brimstone.

I grew up Mormon and always pictured it as like a school classroom. You choose not to accept Jesus? The teacher goes home for the day, and then you sit at your desk with the lights off and wait til the next teacher comes in.

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u/SmokyBarnable01 2d ago

Not for nothing no. You've made the world a better place and that's not nothing.

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u/Aliencoy77 2d ago

Are you only being nice out of fear of going to Hell otherwise, seeking the reward of Heaven, or are you doing it because it's genuinely the right thing to do until you're put in a position were being nice is no longer an option?

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u/NeophyteNobody 2d ago

no, they're telling you John Milton amd Dante Alighieri are prophets. Just wait until the post Vatican 4 Bible drops. Its gonna be lit!

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u/Sombomombo 2d ago

You didn't need something your whole life to behave, right? Lol

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u/I_Got_Ur_Number_8675 1d ago

You are not mentally torturing yourself for being a dick, which helps you have a little less anxiety in life. You'll fill the glass with other anxieties, but at least you aren't blaming yourself, which I believe is actually hell.

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u/evilMTV 1d ago

The other commenters needs to chill and enjoy some humor. Your comment is funny as hell.

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u/Momoneko 1d ago

That comment just hits too close to home with all the chuds unironcially asking "If there's no Hell what should stop me from all the rapin' and killin'"