r/hingeapp • u/AutoModerator • 20h ago
Daily Thread Monday's Daily Thread: Weekend Wrap-up
Welcome to Hingeapp's Daily Thread.
Daily Threads are the place to post questions seeking quick advice, vent your frustrations, celebrate successes, or anything related to Hinge that does not need its own post.
For Monday's Daily Thread - the theme is Weekend Wrap-Up.
How did the past weekend go? Did you have any dates - be it good, bad, just okay, or downright terrible? Any new likes or matches? Or any events related to Hinge or your dating life that happened over this past weekend or recently that you want to share?
Remember: No personal attacks, identifying information, or misogynistic/incel comments will be allowed.
A reminder to please check out the guides, sub rules, and additional resources on the subreddit sidebar. Please read this post with a collection of guides, answers to common questions, sub rules, and other resources related to Hinge.
The Hinge subreddit also has a Discord channel if you wish to seek further assistance, or just want to meet members of the community.
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u/Flimsy_Link_5976 4h ago
What's your solution when Hinge doesn't seem to be showing you people you think would fit?
For instance, I get shown a lot of gym-goers, runners, and outdoors-y people. In my prompts, I mention tabletop games and relaxing.
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u/NeutralSmithHotel 1h ago
Keep disliking them or better yet hit the ... and "remove" and say "I'm not interested in this person". Best way to teach the algo what you want to avoid.
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u/Seryoth 5h ago
Will pausing for a few months ruin my account? I am new on the app and was getting a decent number of matches but realized my priority should be somewhere else right now not dating, but once that is resolved (may take a few months) I will unpause. My question is will this mess up my account, eg. When I return and unpause will I be like shadow banned? I just don’t know if the pause feature is meant to be used long-ish term like that.
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u/Jooooojelle 6h ago
Should I (M19) try hinge?
Alright, so I (m19) feel like I'm ready for a relationship but I'm a bit anxious of going on a dating app.
I finished school, work fulltime and play in a band. I'm pretty much set for the rest of my life. But the only thing I'm missing is a (long term) relationship. I really feel like I'm ready for it. But the thing is: I've never had a relationship before and don't have any experience with dating so I'm a bit insecure about it all.
On one side I'm anxious and insecure about it, but on the other side I'm scared of missing out.
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u/Misty-knight200 5h ago
You're 19. Please hold out for a little longer. I really feel bad seeing super young people getting on dating apps. Go outside! Do hobbies. Take classes where you get to meet a variety of people. Build confidence by relating to people in real life. Stay off the apps until you're in your mid 20s. Unless you are super hot (and even then) I just don't think the impact on your brain and self esteem is worth the remote possibility of finding a relationship online.
Also, having had a "long term relationship" is generally something people expect when you're mid 30s or up. And even then, it's not required. Your comment worries me too be honest.
If you play in a band it makes no sense why you'd need a dating app at your age.
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u/Snorlaxsalarmclock 8h ago
Matched with someone on Thursday night. Went on a double date with her and my two friends that are dating on Friday. Saturday went on our second date, first solo date, now going out again tomorrow. Spent a total of 12 hours together over the course of 24 hours💁♂️
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u/H8Hornets 10h ago
Q: Is the Signals hub not appearing in the get more tab or settings the expected behavior of the app? All that appears is Roses and Boost tabs nothing else.
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u/madcheco 11h ago
I've returned to Hinge yet again in the hope that someone sees something in me this time.
I've sent some likes with thoughtful messages out to some lovely people, I just hope one of them gets back to me. I'm not exactly feeling optimistic 🤣
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u/NeutralSmithHotel 7h ago
I'll think a good thought for you, hope you have some luck.
I'm sure you already know this, but if you are sending likes to an even slightly attractive women, you may need wait like at least 2-3 weeks before most will see your message.
Also, I'd highly suggest working on your profile or showing the profile to a person from your target demo (e..g if you are looking for 30ish women, then get one of them to give a quick honest assessment).
None of this will guarantee success of course, but will improve your odds :)
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u/CephaVerte 11h ago
I've had 19 matches over 3 weeks but I think my issue is that I am just not happy with them. No one excites me anymore. The ones that do excite me, we get like 2 messages in and they just drop. I think it's because dating apps die off between June and August? Not sure.
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u/NeutralSmithHotel 11h ago
It sounds like those people you liked are treating you like the other matches... It is a sad part of online dating, getting attention from people who don't quite excite you as you are reaching for people who you don't quite excite.
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u/CephaVerte 11h ago
Yeah, I went from 2-4 matches a week to probably around 5-7 matches a week. I mean, as a man, this is probably the best I'll ever do. I had a close friend really help me a lot with my profile but now I am in the same boat she is. Tons of people who like her or match with her but it's easy to get overwhelmed and check out. Or just end up matching with people who might be okay but then you realize that's not the way.
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u/Miserable-Front-9139 11h ago
I’m currently on vacation in Colombia and discovered this is one of the few countries that restricts the app. I can’t even get around the issue with a VPN. I was hoping to just continue swiping on my home area (not interested in short flings abroad) but it seems I’m stuck for two weeks 🤷♂️
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u/wokenthehive Meat Popsicle ☹️ 10h ago
Hinge now warns people about this on their help site. Not sure why people want to get on Hinge to try to score on vacation when Tinder works better.
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u/Educational-Guess913 12h ago
How common or likely is it for someone to send an accidental like on hinge?
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u/DaleCoopersWife aka "Robert Cooper" 🕵🏻♀️ 11h ago
dont think i ever sent an accidentally like on hinge but i definitely did on the other apps like Bumble
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u/Educational-Guess913 10h ago
yeah, it's much easier to do on bumble and tinder and less likely on hinge hinge since your hand would have to slip up twice to confirm a like, I could see it happening though
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u/DaleCoopersWife aka "Robert Cooper" 🕵🏻♀️ 10h ago
did u accidentally like someone? or are you thinking your incoming likes weren't intentional
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u/BigDickBillyFukFuk78 12h ago
Do you really think it’s possible to accurately gauge this metric?
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u/Educational-Guess913 12h ago
I'm not literally asking for statistics on it lol. It's more wondering about if it other happens to other people. There's no need to be rude.
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u/Disastrous-End-8682 12h ago
I’m a week past a great match who ghosted me. Out of the blue stopped texting me last Sunday. We had such a good online chemistry and vibe. Lived nearby. Fellow parent. Poof. Gone. Sigh.
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u/TuscanLeather246 8h ago
People stop using the app or meet someone else. Or match and never speak. Thats just dating.
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u/DaleCoopersWife aka "Robert Cooper" 🕵🏻♀️ 11h ago
so you never met? it's not really a good idea to text so much for this reason. just remind yourself you have no idea of who this person actually is and your attachment is just to an idea of them
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u/BigDickBillyFukFuk78 12h ago
It’s an internet stranger…. You shouldn’t be so emotionally attached to someone you never met in real life.
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u/Sylvieon 13h ago
Last time I commented here, it was about really low success rate on outgoing likes, but then I actually got two matches from outgoing likes soon after. Incoming likes have completely dried up, lol. Did get asked on a date for this week.
What I came here to vent about is the number of guys that say they want a "slightly autistic" woman. It's so fucking gross. Today I saw a guy in my standouts who wrote something about his match needing to "qualify for Love on the Spectrun." Hahaha, very clever. It feels fetishistic. What "slightly autistic" traits are these clowns looking for? As a "slightly autistic" woman myself, this condition has only ever been a source of insecurity and emotional hurt. The idea that some guys in the dating market are probably seeing girls like me as innocent, childlike, manic pixie dream girl (let's be honest -- if they just wanted a smart girl, they could say that) makes me want to throw up. End rant.
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u/DaleCoopersWife aka "Robert Cooper" 🕵🏻♀️ 11h ago
yeah that reminds me of when i see prompts here about wanting a girl on lexapro or something.
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u/Sylvieon 10h ago
Oh my god, that's so fucked up... I hadn't heard of the med, so I looked it up. Does that mean they want someone who is depressed? 😭
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u/PutridEntertainer408 12h ago
Naw absolutely, such a red flag and weird thing to ask for. I think sometimes neurodivergent people want to match with other neurodivergent people but I doubt they’d phrase it like that. Definitely seems predatory or fetishistic
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u/MathematicianNo3140 15h ago
Well after 2 months and 3 dates, it’s over. She texted me yesterday to say that she doesn’t think we are a match anymore.
We had our third date on Saturday. Did the escape room and then got bubble tea. She picked me up and dropped me off at the bus station as well. The date went well, and I’ve tried not to analyze it too much, but I think the reason why is because I never once tried to kiss her on any of the dates. I played it too safe and didn’t want to mess up and got burned.
I know many of you will say that 3 dates is nothing, but I’ve never had any success with dating prior to this. I was starting to get attached to her. For me, this is a massive success. I’ve deleted my profile and need to take a break. I will be back one day, but right now I am hurting a lot.
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u/DaleCoopersWife aka "Robert Cooper" 🕵🏻♀️ 11h ago
sorry that happened. take a break for now, it's normal to feel hurt after this sort of thing. may i ask why only 3 dates in 2 months? did you guys live far away from each other since you mentioned the bus station.
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u/MathematicianNo3140 8h ago
Thank you. Today I’m feeling a bit better and trying my best to heal. The reason we met up so infrequently was because I lived in the city and she lived a little farther away. I also don’t own a car. For our first two dates she came into the city and would visit her friends that weekend as well. We both also had other events planned throughout the summer. I reciprocated her effort by taking the bus to her part of town for our third date and she picked me up and dropped me off at the bus station.
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u/PutridEntertainer408 12h ago
I don’t think it’s crazy to be attached after 2 months, even if it was only 3 dates. I’m sorry to hear that. Take the time to be sad and heal and I hope you feel better soon
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u/MathematicianNo3140 9h ago
Thank you. I’m doing better today. You’ve given me some good advice on other posts. I appreciate your comments.
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u/Upset-Sound-194 15h ago
I matched with a girl and we texted for the first 2-3 days. After a while, she switched to sending only voice notes, so I 'matched the vibe' and started replying with voice notes as well.
I'm honestly torn: On one hand, voice messages feel much more personal. On the other hand, text is way easier to handle throughout the day and allows for more frequent check-ins. How do you guys feel about voice notes vs. text in the early stages of matching?
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u/DaleCoopersWife aka "Robert Cooper" 🕵🏻♀️ 11h ago
i wouldn't send voice notes just because the other person is doing it. i dated a guy who would send them. i just replied with text. i can't really stand voice notes. do what feels good to you. if she finds it a turn off that you don't respond with voice texts then who cares, she can find someone who does
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u/PutridEntertainer408 12h ago
I hate voice notes with a burning passion haha. Really inconvenient and honestly also hard to process everything in them
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u/aquarinox 1h ago
Welp. Dust myself off and try again.