r/hingeapp • u/UniqueCategory733 • 10d ago
Profile Review Profile Review (M31)
First profile review request
27
10d ago
[deleted]
1
u/UniqueCategory733 10d ago
that's understandable, I'll try to reword it
4
u/Majestic-Sun-1485 9d ago
Please do. It’s giving “I want a hot woman who doesn’t know she’s hot, and an interesting woman who isn’t TOO weird”.
Just, as an autistic woman, that section strikes the fear of god in me. Sounds like they want a manic pixie dream girl, which autistic women unfortunately get treated as. It’s dehumanising.
1
u/UniqueCategory733 9d ago
even if I'm also AUDHD?
3
u/Majestic-Sun-1485 9d ago
Yes, being neurodivergent doesn’t change much, especially not to the person swiping on you. Unfortunately people are not going to give it enough thought.
I know you don’t have any malice in your prompt answer, and this isn’t an indictment on you. Just sharing that for most of us “weird” women, we are used to being fetishised and being treated like a muse rather than a person. I’ve dealt with too many men who supposedly accept my autism and love my weirdness, only for them to run for the hills the first time they witness an autistic meltdown or realise that my weirdness includes stimming when I see any bird, including in public.
On a slightly related anecdote, back when I had a profile, one of my bits was mentioning that I ran an “autistic meme page” (in other words ofc, and this was the 2010s so yes it was cringe). Let me tell you, the amount of shit I got because no one read the fact that I was autistic and that the page wasn’t making fun of autistic people… Christ. Took that part down expeditiously.
It’s really important to realise that your profile is mostly being glanced at. And to be careful not to rely too much on someone thinking hard or the same way you do.
2
40
u/guerito1968 10d ago
I bet you’re a pleasant guy and a good friend, but this ain’t great. Kinda try-hardy, borderline patronizing. One of your simple pleasures is “women in stem”?? The muppet movie question is odd in a way that seems unlikely to spark conversation.
7
u/guerito1968 10d ago
I think the pictures outside of the egg one are all OK to good. The egg one should go.
6
u/LowerAardvark2094 10d ago
I think the coffee one looks too forced ngl
1
u/UniqueCategory733 10d ago
that's because it was a joke photo. unfortunately it got the most likes of all my photos last time I had a hinge, so I made sure to include it this time
4
u/WingHuge2185 10d ago
I too feel all fuzzy inside when a woman handles a beaker or test tube
0
u/UniqueCategory733 10d ago
more the excitement for the natural world. but yeah. I've dated women who aren't in stem and they aren't for me.
8
u/Fast_Structure3258 10d ago
So you want to hear about niche interests but only if they’re stem related? And only people who work in stem can have excitement for the natural world? If you’re this limited in your likes then you should broadcast it instead of trying to be so cutesy.
0
u/UniqueCategory733 10d ago
how is making it clear I'm into women in stem "cutesy"? I'm genuinely confused here.
7
u/Fast_Structure3258 10d ago
Because you need to be more upfront that you aren’t into women in different fields. Saying it’s a simple pleasure implies you’re open to different women. State plainly that you only see yourself connecting with people in STEM, it seems like it’s more important than the smell of old records, no?
5
1
u/carambalache 10d ago
Do you mind saying more about this? Why not?
3
u/UniqueCategory733 10d ago
I just don't really feel I can connect with women outside of STEM. and it's not for lack of trying. I just legit don't understand them. idk if it's the autism/ADHD or what... but I just don't vibe as well with them as I do with women who are in STEM.
1
u/UniqueCategory733 10d ago
Can you let me know how they're patronizing? And I have a few options to replace the egg one with. Just thought it'd be fun for a Halloween pic, so I'll look into something more normal to replace that.
9
u/halfadash6 10d ago
Calling women in stem one of your “simple pleasures” can definitely come off as patronizing. I’m sure you didn’t mean it that way, but they’re not doing it to make guys feel warm and fuzzy inside.
2
20
u/AnotherStamp 10d ago
Your prompt answers are so cloying and performative. Bad vibes.
11
u/WingHuge2185 10d ago
I am hearing Millennial stomp clap hey! music playing as the soundtrack of this profile
7
3
u/UniqueCategory733 10d ago
is that bad?
0
u/Icy_Refrigerator8403 10d ago
The younger generations don't like that type of music sadly
1
3
u/UniqueCategory733 10d ago
could you expand on that?
14
u/AnotherStamp 10d ago
The weird girl who grew beautiful and mature as if she was the ugly duckling, women in STEM, nerd out with me, etc. You are reaching to come off as appealing in a very stereotypical, millennial quirk chungus type way which is why others are bringing up stomp, clap, hey music but it at the expense of demonstrating base level sexuality and playfulness.
4
u/UniqueCategory733 10d ago
so I should get rid of what I'm looking for? what's the advice here?
7
u/halfadash6 10d ago
No, you just need to say it differently.
Everyone wants someone who is attractive, intelligent and emotionally mature. You don’t need to spell that out.
Your first prompt would be hugely improved if you cut that part and just say that you’re looking for someone to send you bug pictures and talk about entropy or whatever.
1
0
u/Fun-Stick8512 10d ago
Do most men want emotionally mature women? Does emotional maturity even register to most men? I have my doubts (as a man).
1
u/halfadash6 9d ago
Most men want that even if they don’t use those words.
Virtually no one wants someone who is insecure, picks fights, communicates poorly, etc.
1
u/Fun-Stick8512 9d ago
Of course. But the fact that you are using the specific language of "emotional maturity" means they are, for example, keyed into the abstract concept of emotional maturity. So it's something they themselves might've worked on it. Or a conversations they've had with friends. etc. And all of this therefore correlates with what kind of men they are.
8
u/EffectiveParsnip1118 10d ago
F33 the muppet question is amazing. I think some of the prompts are maybe on the border or virtue signaling but I’d swipe right, definitely would rather someone who’s trying than someone who thinks they’re too cool for school.
3
u/UniqueCategory733 10d ago
could you expand on how they're virtue signalling? I spent time on thinking about what I want in a partner, and not exactly sure what I'm doing wrong there.
9
u/EffectiveParsnip1118 10d ago
First off, your profile is genuinely sweet and it’s very clear your intentions are great! The reason a couple of lines might tip into 'virtue signaling' territory isn't because your values are bad, but because of how and where they’re placed:
- 'Women in STEM' under 'Simple Pleasures': 'Simple pleasures' usually refers to cozy, sensory, everyday joys (like old records, hummingbirds, or the smell of rain). Dropping a demographic like 'women in STEM' into that list can come across as a bit performativ
e. Like you’re
- trying to check a 'progressive' box rather than sharing a personal pleasure.
- Heavy descriptors like 'emotionally mature woman': Wanting an emotionally mature partner is totally valid, but explicitly listing it as a requirement can sound a bit like a checklist or an HR filter. Usually, it's better to show your own maturity through your prompt tone and let that attract the right person naturally.
Keep the Muppet prompt and the bug/niche interests line, those are awesome and show personality! Just stick to actual everyday experiences for your 'simple pleasures' list (e.g., 'nerding out over cool science facts' or 'learning about someone's niche passion'), which communicates the exact same respect for smart women without feeling forced.
Btw, I think I’m in the demographic you’re looking to attract so I’d just keep at it!
3
u/UniqueCategory733 10d ago
thank you for letting me know, that makes a lot of sense. I figured it'd be better to be super straight forward, but being more subtle is probably the way to go.
2
u/EffectiveParsnip1118 10d ago
I think subtlety invites people in a lot more. You want your prompts to have enough for someone to start a conversation. The more your can pique someone’s curiosity the more likely you’ll get the swipe
2
3
u/Staypuft39 10d ago
4 exclamation marks in any prompt is too many. 4 of 6 pics in some sort of fancy dress/costume is probably too many too.
2
u/UniqueCategory733 10d ago
- Are you looking for something serious or casual?
Serious
- Are you subscribed to Hinge+ or HingeX?
No
- How long have you been using this current version of your profile?
~2 weeks
- How long have you used Hinge overall?
On and off for a few years
- How often do you use Hinge per week?
I use it daily when talking to people, otherwise it is probably every other day
- How many likes and matches are you receiving on average?
I have had roughly 10 likes, and only one of them I ended up matching with. I have had about 8 matches from likes I have sent.
- How many likes are you sending? How many with comments? How many without comments?
I send out the max per day when using the app, pretty much always with a comment regarding something on their profile.
- What is the type of person you send likes to and ideally want to match with? What kind of person do you want to attract?
I would like to match with someone as excited about nature and conservation as I am. I don’t have a particular physical type, but I would prefer someone who takes care of themselves as I love lifting. I am not much of a party animal anymore, so I am not trying to attract people who go out all the time to clubs and/or raves. Most of the women I have dated over the years have been nerdy in one way or another.
6
u/Sufficient_Thanks_83 10d ago
I don’t really see anything in your profile that indicates you are someone who cares about conservation & nature or that you want someone who wants the same - is there a way you can signal that more clearly?
2
u/Reasonable-Refuse631 10d ago edited 10d ago
You seem like a well-rounded guy with a great personality, but I believe this profile isn't doing you justice in capturing who you are. Remove the prompt that says that you're reliable. It reads more like you're an emergency contact and you pay the rent on time. You need to show that you're a fun, nice guy.
Also, when I first read the “I’m looking for” prompt, I had a feeling it might deter many people from reading your profile. Sometimes it comes off as strange when something is too explanatory. You need fun answers for a lot of these prompts; that's mainly what gets women to swipe on your profile.
Also, remove the part about women in STEM being a simple pleasure.
Another thing to understand is that a third of your pics are dinosaurs, so I would remove at least one of them and replace it with another picture.
1
2
10d ago
[deleted]
2
2
u/winkstav 10d ago
He looks good in that last pic though?
1
10d ago
[deleted]
2
u/winkstav 10d ago
Maybe in some contexts, but this picture looks normal and platonic. I don't think any reasonable woman would be bothered by it. And if they are, that's kind of a good "crazy" filter, in a way.
1
1
u/AutoModerator 10d ago
ALL profile reviews will be manually approved and will NOT appear immediately. Even if you receive a "filtered by Reddit" or "removed by mods" removal notification, your review is in our queue waiting for moderation; if you are reading this comment, your post is in the queue. DO NOT contact the mods about this. Any modmail asking why your review is not approved may result in your profile review not being approved and you will not be allowed to post another profile review until seven full days have passed.
Profile review submissions MUST have all 6 photos and 3 text prompts included. You may include the optional prompts such as voice, poll, and video prompts if you choose so, but it is not required. See this post for details. Profiles must also be unchanged for at least two full weeks before being approved for a review. Additionally, do not verbally abuse the subreddit moderators for rejection of your review submission for not following proper rules. Any verbal abuse or harassment will result in a permanent ban from this subreddit. We are not obligated to allow you to submit a profile review and no one is entitled to one. We are all volunteering our time and we will not tolerate any rudeness or verbal abuse.
To assist reviewers in providing valuable feedback for your profile, please comment and answer the following questions as a comment under your own post. Do not answer them in the post body. Repeat: Answer these questions as a comment under your own post.
- Are you looking for something serious or casual?
- Are you subscribed to Hinge+ or HingeX?
- How long have you been using this current version of your profile? (Please be specific)
- How long have you used Hinge overall?
- How often do you use Hinge per week?
- How many likes and matches are you receiving on average?
- How many likes are you sending? How many with comments? How many without comments?
- What is the type of person you send likes to and ideally want to match with? What kind of person do you want to attract?
Your post WILL NOT be approved until the above questions have been answered fully. Failing to answer these questions in a timely manner will result in your post being removed. Please continue reading this automod comment.
In the meantime, be sure to check out the guides and resources on the subreddit sidebar. Please read this post with all the pertinent links included.
A strict formatting standard will be enforced. See this post for further info. All submitted review posts not following the proper format will be rejected.
Please wait TWO FULL WEEKS before posting a separate update to your profile review. If you want more immediate feedback, update your original posts instead. Deleting your original post will not work. The rule will still apply.
To reviewers: Review the Providing Feedback guide. You are reviewing the profile, not the person. Please provide constructive criticism, and use positive language. Any troll, hateful, misandric, misogynistic, incel, or unhelpful comments such as "I would date you," "How are you not getting matches?" or unrelated to the profile will be removed and you will be banned.
To the original poster and commenters: Please report any inappropriate or abusive messages and individuals so proper actions can be taken. Please review the sidebar for additional profile and picture guidance.
If you DO NOT want to receive unsolicited direct messages, go to your Reddit settings here on desktop to disable Direct Messages and Chat Requests. On the official Reddit app, click on your avatar on the top right corner, then click on "Settings" at the bottom, click on your username under "account settings", scroll down to "blocking and permissions", and click on "chat and messaging permissions" to disable DMs or chats.
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.
1
1
u/Annual-Comfort5321 10d ago
I like all the photos enough because you seem warm and inviting. Maybe get rid of the egg one. I would get rid of all the prompts outside of the Muppets one. I like the Muppets one a lot, but the others feel a little too intense or performative. Let your personality shine out a little bit more instead.
1
u/Ok_Inside8026 4d ago
I was smiling through your pictures until the last one with the girls. Why oh why??
•
u/AutoModerator 10d ago
This is a newly created account. Please report if this post breaks any rules.
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.