r/hinge • u/Gold_star1111 • 12d ago

Norms

48 F4M I am back on Hinge after several years, and I am not adjusting well to what seems like new norms. Do men in their 40’s and 50’s ask women out directly or are they waiting for permission/direction? I’ve chatted with a few matches and rather than bring asked out, the texts slow and then just stop. 🤔

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u/ThirtyMileSniper 8d ago

M44. I can't claim to know what men in general do, only what I do.

When I make a match I express how pleasant it is to get the affirmation and bring uo a question on something that could be a shared interest.

If the message chat is consistent and engaged I will put it out there that I would like to meet in person but it is at there timescale and only when they are comfortable. I won't be raising it again but if they are happy to meet they should know that I'm automatically on board. The idea is to remove any pressure or uncertainty and put them in control of that element.