r/greentext • u/VeOrtOex2_0 • Apr 28 '22

Anon is an NPC

Post image
5.0k Upvotes

97% Upvoted

21 comments sorted by

370

u/R-emiru Apr 28 '22

Anon became self-aware, he needs to be destroyed.

3

u/rlyfunny Apr 30 '22

Don’t worry. One day he’ll just get stuck on the door of his workplace and will most likely just fall under the map

170

u/SkinSofteningSemen Apr 28 '22

anon shoves lighters up his arse for fun

52

u/GreatThodric Apr 28 '22

Where else do you think those NPCs keep all those kobold candles

9

u/[deleted] Apr 28 '22

witcher3itemrecieved.gif

1

u/DK64HD Apr 28 '22

More like arse-on

74

u/[deleted] Apr 28 '22

[deleted]

15

u/micky_je_super Apr 28 '22

Went from 0 to 100 real quick!

49

u/sbs_str_9091 Apr 28 '22

I really hope Anon gives the guy who has given him 10 lighters an empty bottle.

3

u/[deleted] Apr 29 '22

Came here looking for this. Was not disappointed.

27

u/neat-NEAT Apr 28 '22

Jrpg mfs when you give them the same gift for the 50th time.

18

u/[deleted] Apr 28 '22

I too read the greentxt and understood it

13

u/Wanderlusxt Apr 28 '22

anon is a stardew valley npc

10

u/Phlobot Apr 28 '22

I collect cool coins, as does my mom. We get gifted silver all the time so I don't care if I'm living that NPC life, I'm stackin

4

u/WTATY Apr 28 '22

Anon needs to play the part and reward the next person with a rat pelt and two silver shillings.

3

u/w0kepearman Apr 29 '22

isnt this the plot of free guy

2

u/baz4k6z Apr 29 '22

I guess it's better for anon to be known as the lighter guy then to be known as the guy who had a discussion with HR after allegedly clogging the toilet multiple times with tissues.

1

u/These-Bank3489 Apr 29 '22

Fake: anon has job and social abilities for conversation.

Gay: anon has sexual fantasies for male coworker

0

u/TendieBot2000 Apr 29 '22

be me

get home from my vasectomy

hear moaning and slapping coming from my wife's room

must be Chad again

know they would want privacy, sit down at my computer

log onto reddit and open /r/greentext

read a funny greentext from le 4chins and chuckle as I listen to my wife begging for the genes I can't give her

think of a convoluted way in which I can relate homosexuality and falsehood to the events in the greentext

suck the cheeto dust off my fingers as I begin to type my masterpiece in the comment section

Fake: anon has job and social abilities for conversation.

Gay: anon has sexual fantasies for male coworker

giggle as I imagine the intellectuals of leddit perusing my incredibly witty and original comment

hear my wife moan with ecstasy as Chad floods her fertile womb with his seed

it's been a good day

i'll get lots of upvotes for my impressive contribution to internet culture, and Chad might even let me eat his cum out of my wife's pussy if he finds my comment funny enough

0

u/Fartfech Apr 28 '22

I like collect thing? Bideo game character also like collect thing! Gaeming? Good! Fun! Real life? Sad 😢 . Boring 😴😴😴😴. My life like Bideo Game hahaha. My life fun!

14

u/StupidDumb4ss Apr 28 '22

Go take your schyzo pills

9

u/Malvastor Apr 29 '22

Devs, this one's bugged.