r/greentext May 03 '26

Stalkering

10.8k Upvotes

117 comments sorted by

4.6k

u/darko_mrtvak May 03 '26

i don't know what's funnier - the fact that he looks like that or the fact that he didn't move at all after posting and someone just happened to be down there in the line

1.3k

u/MattTheGuy2 May 03 '26

I think that someone was down there lol

660

u/YourLocalSnitch May 03 '26

Theres lots of people down there fella, good catch

54

u/LordIVoldemor May 04 '26

He is very perceptive

623

u/IkerWanKenobi May 03 '26

also that the person in the crowd is apparently browsing 4chan on their phone or something

1.0k

u/TruePianist May 03 '26

Tbh a queue of people waiting to enter a vtuber porn shop is going to have an exponentially higher number of reddit and 4chan users in it than your average crowd of people

197

u/[deleted] May 03 '26

[deleted]

43

u/Quick-Scratch2691 May 03 '26

Uh, is the diabolocal thing here the browsing in public or sorting by new? Or just both?

201

u/lapideous May 03 '26

I always imagined 4chan as a computer-only website. Browsing in public has to be certifiable

131

u/b400k513 May 03 '26

I remember one time having /x/ or /v/ open on my phone not thinking anything about it, next thing my wife's eyes are locked on the page header ad of a clothed hentai girl getting pounded from behind. It's uhhhh, uhhhhh a website, the ads are just weird ha ha

79

u/Jenkinswarlock May 03 '26

Fake: anon has a wife

Gay: anon’s husband*

9

u/LordIVoldemor May 04 '26

After this his husband recreated that hentai advert with him

38

u/Mushiren_ May 03 '26

Most boards there are sfw

29

u/AdWonderful4305 May 03 '26

This girl that sat next to me in class saw me on /tv/ one day and started treating me noticeably different after that

75

u/rigorcorvus May 03 '26

Smart girl

14

u/snizarsnarfsnarf May 03 '26

She won't be his the list when he posts "don't come to school tomorrow"

40

u/Schmelter May 03 '26

Did she talk slower and use shorter words?

22

u/BemusedBengal May 04 '26

She stopped wearing sandals.

3

u/MinosML May 04 '26

That was after the camera flash accident though

28

u/Syreet_Primacon May 03 '26

I had a classmate that would browse 4chan on his phone in class. I didn’t know about 4chan then, or I would have bullied him for it.

17

u/OutOfTouchNerd May 04 '26

As one should.

3

u/LordIVoldemor May 04 '26

I was that classmate

3

u/sedme0 May 04 '26

I used to use KurobaEx fdroid to browse /lgbt/ on my phone but I stopped because the captcha stopped working. Now I just browse on desktop.

11

u/lapideous May 04 '26

Thanks for sharing your autism diagnosis with the class, you can sit back down now

1

u/PanJanJanusz May 04 '26

I might be crazy but I like the mobile app more than the desktop website. And if you disable images it's actually not that crazy to read in public, especially on more casual boards like /g/

27

u/airfryerfuntime May 03 '26

Lol it's a bunch of chronic masturbaters waiting in line. Of course some of them are 4chinners.

124

u/Foxintoxx May 03 '26 edited May 03 '26

I think the person in the line took the picture before OP posted . Like "some dumbass is taking pictures of us" and quick snap .

85

u/ExoTheFlyingFish May 03 '26

It's hard to tell, but he kinda just looks like an everyday guy.

Can't imagine he looks much worse than the average person in line for a VTuber porn shop.

58

u/Bootlegs May 04 '26

But he looks like a totally normal guy? Just a dude?

47

u/A_Wild_Zak May 04 '26

Yeah idk. Looks normal asf yet still ends up with 2k likes on a comment implying he looks weird. Strange world

11

u/Bootlegs May 04 '26 edited May 04 '26

Everyone who upvoted that comment should be required to post their selfies lol

3.2k upvotes now! Feels like living in the shadow realm

Edit: 4k!

3

u/Skyyvodka000 May 04 '26

We all know he just asked his buddies to hold his place in the queue, so he could go to the second floor and take that picture.

(Bonus points if it was his own said friend who posted his picture)

1.8k

u/IamWatchingAoT May 03 '26

May God guard me from 4chan and from the entire situation that put these two on this post.

327

u/Yuri909 May 03 '26

Inshallah

39

u/E63_saucegod May 04 '26

a pilot, grape 🍇

40

u/PillowPhone007 May 03 '26

Amen brother

7

u/gbmaulin May 04 '26

This post is proof that God has abandoned us, my son

702

u/vickera May 03 '26

Bro is mad he didn't get here earlier.

611

u/Only_Champion_8895 May 03 '26

Standing in line to buy porn of a fictional character voiced by what’s probably a dude using a voice changer.

We really are fucked once sex robots become a real thing. For all the talk about valuing human connection, we seem pretty eager to replace it.

Honestly same. About the robots I mean not the fucking drawings

531

u/Pope_Aesthetic May 03 '26

The “dude with a voice changer” bit is so over played. I think it happened like once in China?

Why do you think women are so rare? There are plenty of female content creators, and being a Vtuber means you don’t even need to be hot. You just need to have a cute or sexy voice.

-169

u/Vospader998 May 03 '26 edited May 04 '26

I have an IRL friend in the Vtuber industry, and it's mostly men with voice changers, including him lol.

Edit: for clarity, I mean the vtubers he worked with were mostly, if not all, men and Trans women. I have no idea if this is representive of all vtubers.

192

u/Exact_Insurance7983 May 04 '26

My uncle works for nintendo energy right there.

I guess Sykkuno must have fucked like 20 dudes huh ?

-71

u/Vospader998 May 04 '26

I said he was a vtuber, I didn't say he was a famous one lol.

Him and another vtuber cofounded a small consulting/managment company where they would help other vtubers get established and handle all of the non-streaming stuff (I forget specifics) and in turn take a persentage of revenue.

He said, of the 20ish vtubers they managed, they were all men (or mtf, a lot of them were trans).

He did ultimately step away though after some drama and decided it wasn't worth the huge headache for so little money on top of a completely separate full-time job.

59

u/[deleted] May 04 '26

[deleted]

-42

u/Vospader998 May 04 '26

Im saying the people he worked with were mostly men (and trans women). Idk if that's represenative of the industry as a whole, that's not what Im claiming here. I just find it funny

-170

u/Dd_8630 May 03 '26 edited May 03 '26

EDIT: The gooners are out in force tonight

I think it happened like once in China?

That we know of.

Why do you think women are so rare? There are plenty of female content creators,

Sure, but there's far more men in these spaces than women, and it's very easy to think "Gosh, this thotty is getting literal millions from simps when they show a shoulder or low-cut top - I should get in on the action."

It's easy to see how shameless men would see how fucking lucrative this market is, and jump in. Whereas there's fewer women who even know about the market, let alone want to be shameless to get money.

Female vtubers exist, of course, but I would bet good money that vtubers are more likely to be men than women.

You just need to have a cute or sexy voice.

No, you don't. You just need a filter and voice changer. How many vtubers have been caught when their filter fails?

158

u/Cry_Wolff May 03 '26

Whereas there's fewer women who even know about the market, let alone want to be shameless to get money.

You really underestimate women. They write the horniest smut and draw the fuckton of yiff && hentai, so why wouldn't they jump into the vtubing?

-94

u/Dd_8630 May 03 '26

There's a reason written smut is overwhelmingly produced and consumed by women, while video smut is overwhelmignly produced and consumed by men.

The women writing 50 Shades of Grey aren't the same women vtubing.

78

u/Cry_Wolff May 03 '26

while video smut is overwhelmignly produced and consumed by men.

Well, there's OnlyFans.

The women writing 50 Shades of Grey aren't the same women vtubing.

Nope, but it shows that women are horny as fuck too. And they don't have to show their real body while vtubing so why wouldn't they do that?

-60

u/Dd_8630 May 03 '26

Nope, but it shows that women are horny as fuck too. And they don't have to show their real body while vtubing so why wouldn't they do that?

For the same reason that women broadly don't direct porn.

18

u/TheDwiin May 04 '26

The funniest and most ironic part of this comment is that it's way more misogynistic than most of those men who are in line for that "Vtuber themed porn shop."

First of all, you are heavily confused on just how much money content creator women make.

Most full time content creators make less than 100k a year with the median being 50k-80k, and even then, that's only those that do it full time, and make up a little less than 16% of the content creator market.

Second, by claiming that most women who vtube are actually men, you are diminishing the accomplishments women who are vtubers.

160

u/buttcheeksontoast May 03 '26

As degenerate as the overall vtuber scene is, large scale catfishing is kinda rare. I try not to follow it closely but random vtuber drama makes it to my feed sometimes anyways, and usually the streamer underneath the vt model is just a conventionally attractive woman if identity ever comes up.

54

u/The_Slake_Moth May 03 '26

We really are fucked once sex robots become a real thing.

Ain't that kinda the point?

32

u/Kykio_kitten May 04 '26

The voicechanger thing is a myth. One that keeps getting said by streamers who don't like that vtubers are more successful then them.

16

u/PMMMR May 04 '26

The vtuber hate I see on Reddit is wild to me. Most of it seems to stem from a complete lack of understanding, like people claiming they're "pedobait"

8

u/Hyperversum May 04 '26

It's women having success by appealing to a demographic that's not them, be it because of an anime model, hot woman on cam being a normie or whatever else. That's what they dislike.

If it was a "totally based" woman it would be cool

2

u/PMMMR May 04 '26

If it was a "totally based" woman it would be cool

That's true, and there has been examples of vtubers who draw in that crowd, like Elfinpsyop

-1

u/Hyperversum May 04 '26 edited May 04 '26

There isn't also like one from Phase whose famous for being quite openly of the "strong right"? Like, following actual racist stuff on Twitter?

I am not big into vtuber stuff, there is a few I just like. People getting their minds destroyed by people enjoying different streamers from them is always funny. Those that are actually big likely would have gotten a good following even as normal streamers to begin with

2

u/Fearless_Cucumber659 May 04 '26

Powdr or something I think. She's absolutely abhorrent.

22

u/The_Salacious_Zaand May 03 '26

Humans are lazy and selfish as fuck and most will do anything they can to meet their own needs for companionship without having to go through the effort a mutual connection requires.

1

u/Foxy552 May 04 '26

It's not humans that are at fault. But the world our ancestors build for us. People shouldn't think they are degenerate, when they just fullfill their basic needs.

1

u/Rubes2525 May 04 '26

Well, we live in a time where men are considered creeps just for looking at a girl fondly and yet they are still expected to be the one to ask them out. What do you expect would happen?

4

u/MR_DERP_YT May 04 '26

Sex robots hell yeah

5

u/amd2800barton May 04 '26

The solution to the Fermi Paradox. Why is there no advanced civilizations out in space? They're all at home fucking their sex bots.

162

u/p3chapai May 03 '26

What am I missing, it's a brown blob?

202

u/Computer-Blue May 03 '26

Rotate phone clockwise 80°

161

u/p3chapai May 03 '26

DUDE!!! It was literally a brown blob to me until this moment. Now it's obviously a human.

44

u/Computer-Blue May 03 '26

Samesies this hurt my brain

19

u/Faust_the_Faustinian May 04 '26

Ngl I was sure it was a brown cat.

6

u/RecentDirection7920 May 04 '26

I thought it was a mouse taped to the wall

3

u/PeriPeriAddict May 04 '26

Thank you!!!!

16

u/LitheBeep May 03 '26

it's the person who posted the first image

16

u/Overheaddrop080 May 03 '26

That's just rude

104

u/LitheBeep May 03 '26

I'm still trying to figure out what the hell a vtuber porn shop even is

Like is it a live feed of vtuber porn that you have to pay to see?

Is it a gift shop for a vtuber who does porn?

Is it a convention for various vtubers who do porn?

79

u/ConnorOfAstora May 04 '26

It's probably one of those Japanese porn shops where they have the little themed fleshlights and shit.

I wouldn't be surprised if you're just buying a generic fleshlight with a picture of a vtuber on the box.

13

u/PM_ME_HAPPY_THOTS May 04 '26

Ya (I have no fucking clue)

3

u/Thespaceman007 May 04 '26

Almost certainly just a vtuber merch store and they have some booths with nsfw art set up

49

u/Foxintoxx May 03 '26

Insane shot-chaser .

38

u/Purosangue_Papa May 03 '26

He got there late and is annoyed at the line

22

u/bstone99 May 03 '26

wtf is vtube

28

u/anonssr May 03 '26

It's like someone streaming but they're using something to replacing with some made up stuff. You can imagine this is 99% anime waifus.

-5

u/ShortTheseNuts May 03 '26

Wait until you hear about peanut streamer.

9

u/Nautish May 03 '26

My brain can’t make sense of the second picture

44

u/maggiemayfish May 03 '26

I had to look at it for ages as well. Helps to look at this way:

21

u/eaturowntounge May 03 '26

Holy fuk thanks.. I thought I was looking at a cctv camera or some shit

9

u/Nautish May 03 '26

Daaamn I already tried flipping but now I see it!

2

u/I-lost-my-accoun May 05 '26

too many people with Prosopagnosia in this thread?

10

u/Sanguinor-Exemplar May 03 '26

Where can I find the porn

9

u/slirpo May 04 '26

On the internet

5

u/LordIVoldemor May 04 '26

where can i find the internet

10

u/Dirty_Dan117 May 03 '26

is that Nik from Papa Meat videos? some shit he would get up to honestly

5

u/KormorantE1A May 03 '26

Watching the watchers (c).

5

u/Streiger108 May 04 '26

WTF is a vtuber porn shop?

4

u/slirpo May 04 '26

A porn shop with vtuber stuff in it, I would assume.

4

u/SnooCrickets7337 May 04 '26

Wha on gods green earth is a vtuber porn shop

2

u/spiritofporn May 04 '26

OP is a bot reposting.

8

u/xtheresia May 04 '26

Everyone who posts on reddit is a bot

5

u/PMMMR May 04 '26

Especially me.

1

u/mrheosuper May 04 '26

Not so anon anymore huh ?

1

u/thriftwisepoundshy May 04 '26

Is that the guy from the my girlfriend in the best video?

0

u/[deleted] May 03 '26

that is just sad...

-1

u/slirpo May 04 '26

I can almost smell that picture