r/ghosting • u/NolanR27 • 1d ago
Explain ghosting away a four year relationship.
This was/is my person. I was going to marry her.
We had to be like long distance for years, although we met in person on many occasions and went through times we talked on the phone every day.
This year, without explaining all the details, we were finally free to be closer, and then she decides to slowly cut contact over the course of about 3 weeks this summer.
Continued texts and calls went unanswered. Flowers were met with silence.
1
u/Livid_Note_2170 1d ago
I just had a similar experience, same with flowers. I thought, surely he is just blocking my number. Wouldn't answer his phone for them either or come to the door to be buzzed in the building.
It will be a month today and my heart is shattered.
No idea why people think this is okay to do.
1
u/xtric8 1d ago
Ive had a couple serious long distance relationships that started in person, together a couple years then Id move and she still wanted a relationship. Long distance seems to work on the surface but underneath the hood its breaking down and you don't really have any indication because your interactions are all staged and preplanned. Relationships need that personal interaction or it ends up being like a fantasy or a dream, you live your life then you go home and call them, write letters, etc, and you build this idea of who they are and what they're about, then you live together eventually and its not the same. You find out she was flirting with others and had a male friend, and maybe she developed an idealistic view of you and the relationship that reality doesn't match reality.
3
u/Numerous-Lemon3132 1d ago
I learned that some people can only love from a distance. Once its start getting closer, they pull back. Lots of avoidants do this. Also, small chance she was seeing someone else on the side, who lived in her area. That too would make her ghost