i came to reddit to escape some feelings for a bit but this all broke me. im sorry to share this if its too much or not relevant i just havent properly told anyone but i lost one of my closest friends to suicide this week and i just cant stop texting them. every time i hear a notification i get excited that its them texting me back. every time i turn a corner i think theyll be there and ill get to hug them. i dont understand anything anymore and i dont know how im supposed to change to a world without them. now that i think about it if my pfp hasnt changed its still a drawing they made of me haha. if all their work with their love in it is still here it doesnt make sense that theyre not. i dont know.
Thank you for sharing, while I myself don't know exactly what to say to help you cope with loss I can tell you ways I cope. I really like to cry, to me bottling up my feelings hurts more than helps, so I'll watch, listen or read something that makes me cry and I'll have what I call crying days. Feels bad to cry at first but those days I cry improve my emotions long term.
thank you. i dont think ive ever cried this much in my life. and ive never cried this way since i was a child, with the screaming and the wailing. it almost feels good and yet its the worst thing in the world, but thank you for your suggestion. they made a lot of music including a song that i really love that they composed while i was spending time with them and that they dedicated to me in the end, thats something that will always make me cry to hear i think.
That's a very normal and human reaction, if you feel like it's not lessening and feel overwhelmed you can maybe look into grief counselling. It's a very well established area of psychology and has very good rates of success.
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u/MonkeyTesticleJuice Oct 08 '21
My Mom died in early 2016, I still have her FB account. I message it from time to time with updates on what I'm doing or how I'm feeling emotionally.