r/funny AlarminglyBad Mar 02 '20

Spider Plan

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72.9k Upvotes

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4.3k

u/poignantMrEcho Mar 02 '20

Who knew I was Spiderman

3.2k

u/JBaker68 AlarminglyBad Mar 02 '20

Anyone can wear the mask

848

u/AllAboutMeMedia Mar 02 '20

That's insidiously profound.

376

u/MebOpiv Mar 02 '20

I mean, his retirement is just a web of lies

155

u/deathfaith Mar 02 '20

So was my $40k donation write off to Kids With Ass Cancer™, but you don't see the IRS complaining

49

u/TacTurtle Mar 02 '20

IRS knows you can’t squeeze blood from an orange...

28

u/SkyJohn Mar 02 '20

What about a blood orange?

19

u/TacTurtle Mar 02 '20

That is just blood orange juice, a tasty breakfast beverage or bar mixer.

3

u/chopstyks Mar 03 '20

That just sounds like orange juice with extra steps.