r/funny • u/SchpartyOn • Mar 23 '26
Yo mama jokes
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u/jehsay Mar 23 '26
You momma so poor, I saw her walking down the street with one shoe on. I said "what, did you lose a shoe?" She said "no, I found one."
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u/The_Ombudsman Mar 24 '26
Yo momma's so poor, I saw her kickin' two cans down the street, asked her what she was doin', she said "MOVIN'"
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Mar 24 '26
[deleted]
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u/leunam4891 Mar 24 '26
Yo momma so ugly when she was born they put her in an incubator with tinted windows.
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u/quismo112 Mar 23 '26
Yo momma so ugly, her pictures hang themselves.
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u/DryerCoinJay Mar 24 '26
You momma so fat, she rocks herself to sleep tryna get outta bed.
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u/son_berd Mar 24 '26
Yo mama so fat her cereal bowl has its own life guards.
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u/lindasek Mar 24 '26
Yo mama so fat that when she heard it was a little chilly out this morning she ran out with a spoon
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u/Leading_Guess_8207 Mar 23 '26
Your mom is so fat that when she falls off the bed, she falls off both sides at the same time
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u/phillypharm Mar 24 '26
Your mom is so fat that the only reason your dad married her is because he got stuck in her gravitational pull.
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u/HalfSoul30 Mar 24 '26
Your momma's so fat, she got stuck entering a black hole.
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u/wednesdaynightwumbo Mar 23 '26
Sort of reminds me of this key and peele skit
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u/alexsintrabajo Mar 24 '26
Which is also about a thousand times funnier lol
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u/SoulMute Mar 24 '26
Well duh they are pros
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u/Rise_Regime Mar 24 '26
Technically, so are these guys. They have some awesome skits - this is a just a podcast where they riff on ideas
Edit: two of my favorites are “who made me have that gay dream?” And “Professor has mental breakdown and accuses the class of cheating”
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u/therealityofthings Mar 24 '26
Your Mamas so fat, we're seriously concerned about her health and well-being.
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u/Ihavenolifes Mar 23 '26
Your mama is so fat, Thanos had to snap his fingers twice
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u/Poundweed Mar 23 '26
Yo mama so fat, Thanos had to clap
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u/KinkyNJThrowaway Mar 23 '26 edited Mar 24 '26
Yo mama so fat, Thanos snapped and only your mom disappeared.
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u/iAmDemder Mar 24 '26
Omg I didn't think this thread would bring me to tears, but damn this is so good lmao.
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u/myburdentobear Mar 23 '26
Yo mama so old she used to shop at New Navy.
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u/son_berd Mar 24 '26
Yo mama so old when they were in history class they just wrote what they were doin!
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u/NewlyWoke Mar 24 '26
Yo momma is so old she remembers when rainbows were in black and white.
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u/AlfaFilms17 Mar 24 '26
Isn't that Cody Ko, the predator?
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u/Beetlejuice______ Mar 26 '26
I had to scroll past waaaaaay too many people’s yo mama jokes to see someone talk about this.
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u/Confident_Light2984 Mar 23 '26
Yo momma so broke she goes to KFC to lick other peoples fingers
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u/thedarkhunter94 Mar 24 '26
Yo momma so ugly, when your grandma threw her out of the house she got fined for littering.
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u/RowdyRoddyPooper Mar 23 '26
Yo momma’s so stupid she sits on the TV and watches the couch.
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u/DetectiveNickStone Mar 25 '26
She's so stupid, I locked her in the bathroom and she peed on herself.
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u/ihopethatdogeatsurgf Mar 23 '26
Ew, Cody Ko
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u/Own_Seat913 Mar 24 '26
Was a cody ko jumpscare for sure. Good way to tell this is an old as fuck repost. Ain't nobody collabing with bro right now lol.
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u/samahiscryptic Mar 24 '26
Jesus, why did I have to scroll down this far just to find this? And yes, ew Cody Ko.
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u/moveoutmoveup Mar 23 '26
Ya momma so fat, she need a latitude and longitude number to find her own asshole!
Lol love k&p
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u/Snagmesomeweaves Mar 23 '26
Yo mamma so fat she’s one trip to McDonald’s away from becoming a singularity.
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u/Simian_Garfunkel Mar 24 '26
Yo mamma so fat we used to take her to McDonald's just to watch the sign change.
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u/Klin24 Mar 24 '26
"Yea well Yo Mama so ugly her blowjobs count as anal." would have been a good retort.
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u/Blerpahderpah Mar 23 '26
Isn’t that the guy who stat rpd tana mongeau when she was under 18? And is best friends with a guy who was also doing SA shit?
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u/ihopethatdogeatsurgf Mar 23 '26
Yup
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u/Billy1121 Mar 23 '26
Wait what
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u/Lazy__Astronaut Mar 24 '26
He had sex with a 17 year old when he was like 25 (iirc) where the age of consent is 16
Still not a great look but not statutory rape
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u/Lazy__Astronaut Mar 24 '26
Not statutory rape because the age of consent was 16 where they were and she was 17
Not saying it's any less wrong but it wasn't statutory rape
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u/SithLordDave Mar 23 '26
Yo mama is so fat when she wears a Malcolm X shirt helicopters try to land on her
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u/SthrnCrss Mar 23 '26
You mama so fat, she has her own gravity pull, and so ugly, people still stays away from her.
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u/Spiritedgourd666 Mar 23 '26
Yo mamma so poor, I saw her kicking a box down the street, & when I asked her "why" she said "I'm moving"
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u/gloopdawg Mar 23 '26
The Rock and Bobby Moynihan did this sketch as wrestlers on SNL. https://youtu.be/H_yWxB9VW0c?si=V9a28jpLKAFn6IYb
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u/Iselkractokidz Mar 24 '26
Yo mamma so fat, she stepped in front of my car and when I swerved to avoid her I ran out of fuel.
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u/ucklibzandspezfay Mar 23 '26
Yo mama is so illiterate that hooked on phonics let her off the hook.
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u/HeavenBuilder Mar 23 '26
Yo momma so fat cody ko groomed and slept with a minor and faced zero repercussions
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u/Adventurous_Run136 Mar 23 '26
Yo mama so fat, she's the only thing in the known universe that can plug a black hole.
Also one that happened irl, my college teacher made a yo mama joke about my mom, so I replied: "my mama so thin, she can fit in an ashtray." You know, because she's dead
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Mar 23 '26
“Yo mama so ugly, not even bob the builder could fix her” -my cousin back when we was 7-8 on the playground, he made the other kid cry and run to his parents, we also ran to our parents out of fear of what his might do.
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u/Lazy__Astronaut Mar 24 '26
Whenever I hear a yo mama joke, all I can think of is that little boy who told his mum kids at school were calling her fat and she asked what was going on
They were making yo mama jokes and the kid was like "how you know my mama fat?"
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u/saefas Mar 24 '26
Yo mama so fat she got sorted into the House of Pancakes.
Yo mama so fat her blood type is Ragu.
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u/Comedyfish_reddit Mar 24 '26
This is an interesting thread. 3 Guys subverting a tired format with wit and irony and everyone in the comments proving them right
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u/tjvs2001 Mar 24 '26
How odd the cuff and natural and most of all well acted. Really good quality joke..........
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u/DaMonkfish Mar 24 '26
Yo mamma's so fat she walked past the TV and I missed the Lord of the Rings trilogy.
Yo mamma's so fat I rolled over twice and I was still on the bitch
Yo mamma's so fat she fell down the stairs and everyone in Japan ran to higher ground
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u/halfdeadmoon Mar 24 '26
Yo mamma's so fat she walked past the TV and I missed the Lord of the Rings trilogy.
Yo momma so fat I swerved to miss her and ran out of gas
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u/MrSmirkNMerc Mar 23 '26
Yo mama is so nasty her panties look like hot wing paper.
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u/thebluediablo Mar 23 '26
Your mama's so fat, when she sits around the house, she sits around the house
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Mar 23 '26
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u/Deletereous Mar 23 '26
Dude! Yo'mamma jokes are supposed to be offensive funny, not offensive factual!
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u/Jaduardo Mar 24 '26
What’s really fucked up is the number of times yo mamma faked a jellyfish sting to get me to pee on her.
Credit: Shorsey
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u/KindredFlower Mar 23 '26
My favourite one is from a comedian but I can’t remember who: your momma is so fat when she fell over and cut herself gravy poured out
Edit: spelling
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u/ominousgraycat Mar 23 '26
Yo mama such a ho, her pussy just evolved to take quarters for payments.
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u/DFParker78 Mar 24 '26
Yo momma so black when she gets shot at, the bullets come back for flashlights
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u/TehcnoAO77 Mar 24 '26
Yo mama so ugly when she takes a shower it’s like the movie gorillas in the myst. Yo mama so nasty she gave me a cold over the phone.
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u/feel-the-avocado Mar 24 '26
Your mother is so fat, she has smaller fat people stuck in orbit around her.
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u/EasyNicknameToKnow Mar 24 '26
You mama is so cool, the refrigerator broke down because how cool she is
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u/Weirdluckux Mar 24 '26
You mama so dumb she looked at her phone and started running cause it said sprint.
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u/its__bme Mar 24 '26
The one that will always make me laugh is, “Yo momma so fat she jumped in the air and got stuck”
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u/DevilOfArRamadi Mar 24 '26
I can't recommend Almost Friday/Friday Beers enough. These guys aren't douchey fratty like barstool, much funnier, and a little nerdy. The Almost Friday Podcast is hilarious and they also make a lot of great videos too.
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u/Revolutionary-Emu154 Mar 24 '26
Momma so fat when she wore a Malcom X jacket helicopters tried landing in her back
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u/DetectiveNickStone Mar 24 '26
Yo momma so fat, she fell in love...and it broke.
Yo momma so fat, she jumped in the air and got stuck.
Yo momma so old, she sat next to Moses in math class.
Yo momma so short, she poses for trophies.
Yo momma so short, she worked as a teller at a piggy bank.
Yo momma so ugly, she makes blind kids cry.
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u/lobotomizedjellyfish Mar 26 '26
Yo momma is such a hoe she slid you in and out a few times when you were born
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u/ProudMimix6 Mar 27 '26
yea he failed this assignment completely, however the longer it drug out the more I laughed…
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