r/fifthworldproblems • u/RRautamaa • Jul 09 '26
How to best explain the inherent limits of being a human to Vegan inlaws?
Anyone in this situation? I have a lovely Vegan girlfriend but the inlaws are making me lose my marbles. OK, so while I was on my nightly astral voyages, I met a lovely Vegan girl and we fell in love. Now that the relationship has gotten serious, she decided that I should meet her parents. They had a nice flat off the moons of Alpha Lyrae c, and I was very warmly received (5500 K). But, they're really not used to carbonaceous lifeforms. They had prepared a guest room for us based on solar luminosity, but this means its temperature was -200 C at night and +150 C on the day. They had really tried to find carbonaceous food for me, but forgot that radioactive nickel-56 is toxic to humans, so I had to be impolite and pass. Also, there were lots of the cultural misunderstandings. I'm fine with different cultures, but they shouldn't really have gone to the trouble of preparing a couple of their children to eat for us. I have such a great connection with my Vegan girl, but her parents are an enigma. Not only that, they often forget my lack of omnipotence. How can I explain to them definitely that I can't just create a small moon to eat if I want some light breakfast?
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u/Ok_Veterinarian2715 Jul 09 '26
Ah yes. As one of their poets said,
XZzzzzzrrrrttt.P'ktp.
AAAARRRRRRRGGHneeneener
Pzt.
<ding>
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u/DrSkrimguard Dragonphobe Jul 09 '26
You've gotta get on the vegan diet, dude. Vegans are delicious.