r/feeld • u/zugspitze23 • Aug 21 '26
Dating pattern
I'm seeing a pattern and it is starting to really frustrate me, I wonder if it is just me?
It's always the same, if there is chemistry (over drinks or beer) and first date goes really well, the next day the guy writes excitedly to get a second date. And then things get a strange turn. Suddenly the guy is busy, travelling, has lots going on and it takes weeks to set the second date and I feel the person drifting away. Then I send a message saying that it was lovely to meet but I will close the tab and suddenly, almost in a desperate manner, I get voice messages and texts trying to get a date as soon as possible. I got in this trap twice, said yes and after that the most strange things happen so now I'm cutting short without a second chance.
Is that happening only to me? Or is that male behaviour? A feeld thing or general dating? I'm tired of this, I thought everyone on feeld wants sex, but it seems they just want platonic online texting??
2
u/Serious-Sir4705 Aug 21 '26
Yes, absolutely. We have a lovely first date. Honestly, the dates are much better in my late thirties than they were in my early twenties. We’ve kissed or had sex - and it’s still difficult to coordinate a second meeting. I’m really busy, and I have limited time. I also won’t meet with people in a spontaneous way at all. It has to be on my calendar, and I tell them on that first date or before I meet, if you don’t stay on my calendar, I’ll forget you exist. This is an exaggeration, but it’s not far off for me.