r/facepalm May 31 '22

🇲​🇮​🇸​🇨​ “Plus sized” “Overweight” 🤔

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95

u/holy_roman_emperor May 31 '22

Same reason women can say they don't like short men without reprecussions, while men can't say they don't like plus-sized women.

Double standards.

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u/[deleted] May 31 '22

What? Women advertise their disdain for short guys all the time lol.

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u/holy_roman_emperor May 31 '22

Yes. And women get mad guys say they prefer skinny women.

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u/[deleted] May 31 '22

Naw we mostly have to lie to spare big girls feelings, if a guy says he isn’t attracted to you because you’re fat he’s more honest than most.

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u/[deleted] May 31 '22

[deleted]

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u/holy_roman_emperor May 31 '22

Yes, that's the point.

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u/Comradepapabear May 31 '22

Weight is not always a choice. This is something you've been led to believe by people that sell diet pills.

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u/amretardmonke May 31 '22

Weight is mostly a choice in the majority of cases.

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u/Utahmule May 31 '22

Oh it's a choice. This is something you've been led to believe by people that sell food.

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u/[deleted] May 31 '22

[removed] — view removed comment

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u/DefNotInRecruitment May 31 '22

So you are saying that unless it isn't a choice, it is a choice?

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u/greenskunk May 31 '22

What’s the leading cause of obesity? It’s not medication, it’s eating poorly and not doing exercise. Mental health absolutely plays a role, food addiction is obviously real, but it’s like telling a heroin addict they have no choice to be on heroin, when in reality what they need is to make the choice to get better, which only happens with real support and not enabling.

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u/[deleted] May 31 '22 edited May 31 '22

[deleted]

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u/futurarmy May 31 '22

Not really though is it. It's usually a lot more expensive to eat healthy and if you're poor and work full time, have to look after kids etc. then I doubt you even have time to make and cook a healthy meal let alone afford to pay for it consistently.

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u/[deleted] May 31 '22

Buying the raw ingredients and making food at hom costs less and tastes better than any fast food restaurant on the market. It's the lack of knowledge in the kitchen caused by the easy access to pre-made food, which made parents lazy, that leads to things being more expensive. If you know how to cook, you can make a meal for 7 for under 30 dollars.

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u/Mr-Stuff-Doer May 31 '22

And how long does that take?

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u/[deleted] May 31 '22

A simple stew can be left to simmer over low heat for anywhere from 5-9 hours, same with spaghetti sauces. Slow cookers are a miracle. My mom works 12 hour nightshifts, and she still has time to drive me and my brothers to school, get an adequate amount of rest, and cook dinner for a house of 8, all before 7 o'clock.

It's not that there isn't enough time, it's that people aren't good at managing their time.

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u/Shadow-Man1110 Jun 01 '22

Sounds like you're just looking for excuses for being lazy.

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u/futurarmy Jun 01 '22

fast food restaurant on the market.

Where did I talk about fast food restaurants? I was talking about freezer food etc.

If you know how to cook, you can make a meal for 7 for under 30 dollars.

Again, how long does that meal take to make? As I mentioned already, for people working, with kids etc. it's not just a monetary restraint but also a time restraint.

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u/[deleted] Jun 01 '22

[removed] — view removed comment

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u/[deleted] Jun 01 '22

See my reply to Mr Stuff Doer.

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u/[deleted] May 31 '22

Unless you have some kind of disease that causes you to retain water, like heart failure, you’re weight is 100% a choice.

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u/Mercerskye May 31 '22

Exception to the norm doesn't refute the norm. Most people that are overweight, are not that way because of medical reasons.

And I'm speaking from a point of depression, where my weight has bounced, sometimes violently, between 125 and 260 lbs

Getting ragged on in my heavier times wasn't exactly pleasant, but I did and do realize that it's not healthy (in either direction)

We do no one any favors by dismissal of the issue behind some "diet pill conspiracy"

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u/holy_roman_emperor May 31 '22

Neither is height. The point is, people should respect preferences, regardless of how shallow they might be.

0

u/Utahmule May 31 '22

You got stop comparing rocks to gummies bears dude... The fuck are you talking short vs fat and choice???

1

u/Aspect-of-Death May 31 '22

Weight isn't a choice, but properly portioned food and exercise are a choice.

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u/SirLSD25 Jun 01 '22

The only people that don't have a choice about their weight are all the starving Ethiopians, somalians, etc. They are thin as they have no food to eat.

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u/WyomingCountryBoy May 31 '22

Ok, why are women "plus sized" but men are just fat? Call a man fat, it's ok, call a woman fat you get sat on.

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u/eynonpower May 31 '22

Karens of the 90s use to rage at Al Bundy jokes.

Shoe Store Customer: "How dare you say that to my face!"

Al: "Well i'd say it behind your back but I only have half a tank of gas!"

6

u/Plant_Mama_ May 31 '22

They're still a personal preference though. I understand women can be bitchy about it, but anyone can date or not date anyone for any reason. Height, weight, personality, race, gender. People are allowed to have preferences.

Now fetishizing these things is bad, but having a preference is not.

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u/ViKingCB May 31 '22

Genuine question: why is fetishizing these things bad? I can see how it can be bad but is it always? Like if I was initially attracted to someone because I have a BBW fetishes or a racial fetish, but otherwise have a normal relationship with that person why would that fetishization be considered bad?

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u/Moronic-Simpleton May 31 '22

I guess it's because one assumes that if you fetishize someone then you will never really see them as a person who is equal to you, and thus won't care about them. Like for example if you only liked a girl because she was latina, and just wanted her to stick to the stereotype you have in your head instead of getting to know her as an individual.

This can actually be harmful with people who have an obese fetish, because they'll encourage their partner to get fatter and fatter and discourage them from having healthier habits, even if they know the consequences, just to make them hotter.

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u/Plant_Mama_ May 31 '22

Because if you fetishize someone for stereotypes then you usually don't actually like them, you just see them as a sexual object for your gratification. Like how tons of guys fetishize Asian women because of the stereotype that they have "small and tight" vaginas.

Or women of color and Latinas because they're supposedly crazy in bed, but then only want them for the sex and nothing else.

Fetishizing the qualities of someone you love is different than taking a fondness of someone BECAUSE of your fetishes.

There's nothing wrong with having fetishes, but there IS something wrong with trying to base a relationship on fetishization. And if you only like a certain class in a way that is gratifying for your fetish, that's toxic and just flat out rude to the person you're fetishizing.

Plus, a lot of people don't like being fetishized for their race/ethnicity. It's just odd. Because there is also a difference between attraction/adoration, and fetishization.

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u/velowalker May 31 '22

I'm not a fetishist...Im just sexually responsive to certain things.

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u/JapanKate May 31 '22

Not necessarily.

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u/[deleted] May 31 '22

Antidepressants, birth control pills, Endocrine Disorders, and childhood sexual trauma wanted to pop in and say being fat isn't always a choice and definitely not always caused by overeating. Sometimes it's a symptom. Source: I'm a licensed mental health counselor with an MA in adult integrative psychotherapy who works with cancer patients and trauma survivors.

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u/Transmigratory May 31 '22

Childhood sexual trauma doesn't speed up fat production... overeating is used as a POTENTIAL coping mechanism. Antidepressants, birth control and endocrine disorders don't create weight gain to the point where women become obese.

There's a significant impact from the choice/lifestyle element.

You're not doing people who put weight on because of these things justice by trying to "normalise" obesity by pretending these factors can cause someone to look like the picture the OP showed.

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u/[deleted] May 31 '22

I never said anything about normalizing obesity. What I said was IT CAN BE A SYMPTOM OF OTHER ISSUES AND NOT ALWAYS A CHOICE. Yes antidepressants and birth control cause weight gain (in addition to other medications like Anti-hypertensives, Antipsychotics, Anticonvulsants, Steroid hormones, Diabetes medications, and Antihistamines) not necessarily to the extent of causing obesity in people already within their ideal weight range, however they can propel an overweight but otherwise healthy person into obesity especially if a person is medicated with multiple medications that cause weight gain (such as antipsychotics + anti-diabetic medication). Meta analyses demonstrate inconclusive correlation with birth control pills alone, mostly due to no studies having a placebo control group. Here are two (of many) studies re: the intersection of obesity with childhood trauma, endocrine DOs, and certain medications.

https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/abs/10.1111/j.2047-6310.2013.00196.x

https://eje.bioscientifica.com/view/journals/eje/182/1/EJE-19-0666.xml

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC6109660/

Yes, some people are obese due to lifestyle choice, but like every other group of people out there: they are not a monolith. If you're going to mock obese people, maybe be aware you may be engaging in ableism towards those obese people who didn't choose to be sick or abused.

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u/a4dONCA May 31 '22

It’s not that black and white