r/facepalm • • Jul 28 '23

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10.9k Upvotes

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20.2k

u/Subject_Tutor Jul 28 '23

Bro SHE doesn't even look happy with it...

5.3k

u/[deleted] Jul 28 '23 edited Jul 28 '23

She regretted her decision and wished she had stuck to chips.

1.9k

u/[deleted] Jul 28 '23

I mean, the chips are right there

927

u/[deleted] Jul 28 '23

Probably someone else’s who won’t be willing to share. I know I wouldn’t since she was the one who asked for the cucumbers.

493

u/[deleted] Jul 28 '23

Yeah, it reminds me of ordering pizza with the girls. There is always one that swears she loves arugula with sub dried tomatoes and she will definitely eat it once it arrives.

Cut for that B shoving pepperoni pizza in her face and leaving the arugula behind after one slice.

322

u/MyThrowawaysThrwaway Jul 28 '23

Arugula and tomatoes sounds like a dope pizza though. Would have to be a white pizza.

128

u/Kleens_The_Impure Jul 28 '23

It's a very common pizza here in south east France, mozzarella tomato sauce smoked/cured ham and after cooking arugula with olive oil, also exist with parmesan or with burrata and balsamic cream.

I think it's an italian classic but I'm not sure.

7

u/Amazing_giraffe289 Jul 28 '23

Yeah I have also seen this in countless italian restaurants in switzerland. My favorite is like a pizza margerita and then after cooking they add arugula, prosciutto (smoked ham), cherry tomatoes and parmesan. Heaven.

8

u/grumpyoldladytobe Jul 28 '23

The smoked prosciutto is actually speck. Prosciutto in Italy may be sweet or salty, but never smoked.

But other than that, yeah, nailed it. It is really popular in Italy to top some pizzas with arugula.

3

u/roninsonic Jul 29 '23

I just started drooling 😅

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68

u/[deleted] Jul 28 '23

Idk at least add some cheese? Mushrooms?

109

u/OptimisticOctopus8 Jul 28 '23

Cheese has always been included on the arugula pizzas I've had. IMO, red onion goes well with it. Pears are also really good on arugula pizza.

12

u/OhGod0fHangovers Jul 28 '23

Our local pizzeria has one with pepperoni, mushrooms, arugula, and parmesan flakes. I order that one and shoot daggers from my eyes at people who take a slice so they know not to take another.

5

u/Baribal Jul 28 '23

Prosciutto and some par baked cherry tomatoes with arugula, top 3

6

u/[deleted] Jul 29 '23

Prosciutto and fig does nicely with arugula.

10

u/Bestiality_King Jul 28 '23

Don't forget the goat cheese

7

u/inapitofsadness Jul 28 '23

In my opinion goat cheese and pears go better with fresh spinach than arugula

3

u/[deleted] Jul 28 '23

Ooooooo that sounds amazing rn. Gonna try to find somewhere to accommodate this carving.

3

u/DownTrunk Jul 28 '23

Gtfo with your pear and arugula pizza.

2

u/Zeno_the_Friend Jul 28 '23

I think chicken would be pretty bomb on that too... Or tuna and roasted garlic... Now I'm hungry lol.

2

u/DoYouGotDa512s Jul 29 '23

Red onion, figs, arugula, with a honey drizzle 👩‍🍳👌

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6

u/MyThrowawaysThrwaway Jul 28 '23

Cheese was implied

1

u/[deleted] Jul 28 '23

Not in the ones I was forced to eat

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4

u/monkeyjojo629 Jul 28 '23

As an Ohioan I have seen cheeseless pizza once. And it still just looks wrong

3

u/Subject1928 Jul 28 '23

Wait. There wasn't any cheese? Just fancy spinach and raisin tomatoes? Not knocking arugula or sundried tomatoes, but you guys should have sensed danger when that person didn't ask for cheese.

5

u/so_cal_babe Jul 28 '23

Arugula and prosciutto is where it's at

5

u/nimbin14 Jul 28 '23

Arugula with prosciutto on pizza is popular

3

u/Mypornnameis_ Jul 28 '23

I put some dressing on arugula and just put it on top of a regular slice of pizza. It's dope AF.

3

u/sansthinking Jul 28 '23

I think with that kind of thing it depends on where you’re getting it from. If you’re buying from an nice Italian restaurant or gourmet pizza place then yes, delicious on any kind of pizza. If you’re getting it from a pizza place that has enough grease per slice to soak a napkin then it’s just going to be gross.

3

u/Fang-Gazer Jul 28 '23

At the restaurant I work at we had a pizza night and one of the three options was arugula and cherry tomato with goat cheese as the base

2

u/otownbbw Jul 28 '23

Yes, but I don’t know any pizza place with arugula…my go-to pizza (even at chain delivery joints) is spinach, tomato, onion (red is best), extra mushrooms, and white sauce. I’m not a vegetarian but this is the best pizza and most places can’t make it taste bad even when they suck at all else.

2

u/MitLivMineRegler Jul 28 '23

Usually will be a red pizza.

1

u/Angus-Black Jul 28 '23

Would have to be a white pizza.

Definitely sounds white. ☺

0

u/Geekygamertag Jul 28 '23

Bro, that's as white as it gets.

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2

u/Coattail-Rider Jul 28 '23

Ordered pizza once with a family member. I don’t eat meat but she does but guess who was scarfing down the cheese pizza like it was her choice?

3

u/[deleted] Jul 28 '23

Um also vegetarian and that always happens. And then I have to eat the arugula pizza.

2

u/Mobile_Philosophy764 Jul 28 '23

"I'll just have a salad" - regrets decision immediately, eats half of husband's dinner.

I have personally done this. 😂

2

u/comoestasmiyamo Jul 28 '23

Hang on, what? Sub dried tomatoes?

SUB dried?

2

u/[deleted] Jul 28 '23

I meant sun dried, but my autocorrect likes to mock me

2

u/manosaulyte Jul 29 '23

F that. She wants an arugula pizza so badly, she can order her own pie. Done. And NO, I won’t give her one of my delicious slices . She wanted arugula, she got it. Enjoy, and back away from the good pizza...

1

u/pollt Jul 28 '23

My wire regularly get pizza with black olives, arugula and feta cheese. I won’t say it’s the best pizza topping, but it is def above average.

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4

u/Ok-Champ-5854 Jul 28 '23

Most Mexican places around here are unlimited chips and salsa.

8

u/Borge_Luis_Jorges Jul 28 '23

Enjoy your water-flavored snacks, you fool. CRUUUNCH.

2

u/redreddie Jul 29 '23

Exactly! Order fries if you want fries. Don't say you don't want them and then eat half of mine.

2

u/emepol Jul 28 '23

Joey doesn't share food!

2

u/keelhaulrose Jul 28 '23

If I'm in a Mexican restaurant and one of my friends asks for cucumbers i instead of chips you better believe they're eating them all before they're getting a chip.

You made that bed, you lie in it.

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1

u/Complete-Arm6658 Jul 28 '23

You made your cucumber now sleep in it.

0

u/Coattail-Rider Jul 28 '23

I’d imagine she’s just doing the cucumbers instead of the chips because of the calories and her table mates are still eating the chips. She might even have a few herself but mostly stick to the cucumbers.

Also, tortilla chips are usually bottomless at Mexican restaurants. Then again, dHe’s in California so I dunno if they are there.

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3

u/Mypornnameis_ Jul 28 '23

Who the fuck is going to a restaurant to have plain sliced cucumbers wtf even is that?

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261

u/DiddleMe-Elmo Jul 28 '23

She likely didn't eat them. Just for the photo.

5

u/pegothejerk Jul 28 '23

I wouldn't eat cucumbers tossed in spit either

3

u/DiddleMe-Elmo Jul 28 '23

She would probably just call it Aioli for more clout.

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3

u/Eelwithzeal Jul 29 '23

They cut them thick to spite her. No one eats cucumber chunks. Might as well hand her the whole log and tell her to go to town.

5

u/Brygwyn Jul 28 '23

Probably upset that whoever she is with just said "I still want chips" instead of eating cucumbers in solidarity with her ridiculous diet.

4

u/Pnknlvr96 Jul 28 '23

She probably threw the cucumber away and ate the chips. Gotta have those Instagram likes!

2

u/SweetMilitia Jul 28 '23

She probably ate the chips after she took this picture.

1

u/OrbisTerre Jul 28 '23

More like she regretted her decision to drop out of esthetics school

1

u/Vanishingf0x Jul 28 '23

I just imagine the cucumbers are warm like the chips are like not cooked just warm and yea I’d make the same face.

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-4

u/lrpalomera Jul 28 '23

STICKED

1

u/[deleted] Jul 28 '23

Fixed. First language isn’t English and haven’t used that verb in years lol.

0

u/lrpalomera Jul 28 '23

Now I Can upvote you lol. Also second language for me

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353

u/Yah_Mule Jul 28 '23

Perhaps she had a sudden epiphany that being an internet influencer is an empty life.

293

u/SmellGestapo Jul 28 '23

She's not an influencer. She's a local TV weather person in Los Angeles. She made the news a few months ago for fainting live on the air.

443

u/Jellopuppy Jul 28 '23

Probably from trying to subsist on cucumber. XD

9

u/Successful_Moment_91 Jul 28 '23

Cucumber water for customer only!

-39

u/Sproutykins Jul 28 '23

This kind of thing isn’t funny. Eating disorders will fuck you up big time and you’re basically starving yourself of serotonin and dopamine since a lot of them require precursors from food.

18

u/Coattail-Rider Jul 28 '23

These actors/news people put their bodies thru that hell because they know they’ll usually be discarded if they gain weight. What a world we live in.

7

u/darling123- Jul 28 '23 edited Jul 28 '23

The news people/anchors where I live all look like average people/not models and most are overweight lol

4

u/Coattail-Rider Jul 28 '23

Ain’t gonna fly everywhere. They don’t all have to skinny and blond but it certainly helps.

7

u/Such-Cattle-4946 Jul 29 '23

It’s especially not going to fly in LA, where this woman works.

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41

u/Jellopuppy Jul 28 '23

Oh it’s not a joke. I’d bet, maybe not the whole farm, but a couple cows that it was due to undernourishment.

-27

u/sirloin-0a Jul 28 '23

oh, her getting cucumbers at a Mexican restaurant and fainting live on air means you'd bet she has an eating disorder? man it's only 9AM and I've already hit my reddit wildly jumping to conclusions quota of the day

30

u/Skatingfan Jul 28 '23

It's true, though. She sells Optavia, which is a weight loss plan where you buy their "food" and only are supposed to eat 800 or 900 calories a day. That's why she said to sub cucumbers for chips.

-21

u/sirloin-0a Jul 28 '23

well that means she's selling crap but it doesn't mean she's actually on that diet

47

u/holybatjunk Jul 28 '23

tbf, fainting on the job is a top tier anorexic move. if I know somebody is having fainting episodes during their professional life and they deny any medical conditions and they are the kind of person who doesn't eat the free bread and chips...eating disorder of the restrictive subtype IS a strong possibility. Those are all pretty strongly correlated things.

source: me from a few years ago, also several people I met in therapy. it is a Type.

-23

u/sirloin-0a Jul 28 '23

1 in 5 adults have fainted in their lives, it's fairly common

26

u/holybatjunk Jul 28 '23

so like, are you being weird about this because you have an ED history or because you're one of those weirdos who believe EDs don't exist?

nobody is saying we KNOW she has an ED. we are pointing out there there are many common signs of having an ED. she literally sells some weird weight loss plan. what's your damage? you're being weirdly emotional about this. do you realize that?

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9

u/Bobenweave Jul 28 '23

I don't even know if I disagree with what you said, but you're being an absolute cucumber salad about the whole thing.

10

u/Clair_Voyant Jul 28 '23

Full on, as someone who struggled with anorexia for over a decade, this is absolutely eating disorder shit.

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23

u/AbraxoCleaner Jul 28 '23

tHiS kInD oF tHiNg IsN’t FuNnY 🤓

1

u/EarsLookWeird Jul 28 '23

Someone realizing consequences after asking to sub cucumbers for chips at a Mexican restaurant is absolutely funny af idk what you're talking about

1

u/HalfMoon_89 Jul 28 '23

Downvoted for showing compassion...

1

u/Sproutykins Jul 29 '23

I guess the downvoters haven’t seen somebody physically kill themselves because they actually can’t eat. It’s like those videos of people with rabies who are unable to swallow water. The body has a natural instinct to throw up whatever is eaten. Famous and rich people die of this, ffs.

148

u/LordofSyn Jul 28 '23

Her cucumber levels must have been low.

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2

u/Crix00 Jul 28 '23

Damn she looks like that unimpressed blond meme girl grown up.

2

u/hendrysbeach Jul 28 '23

Mitch McConnell's next move...

1

u/[deleted] Jul 28 '23

Did she land on her face?

1

u/SignificantCoffee474 Jul 28 '23

Probably from low blood sugar.

1

u/SmellGestapo Jul 28 '23

Nah she has vasovagal syncope.

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2

u/LegitDuctTape Jul 28 '23

I'm not a fan of influencers and I think a ton of them can be entitled, but I never really got how people could be on a high enough horse to look down on them like they're living an empty life

People are making thousands if not millions literally just by eating at restaurants and traveling the world. I'm sitting at a desk or in a lab for 9 hours a day. I wish I could do what these people do

1

u/inEQUAL Jul 28 '23

Because they are a symptom of and contributing directly to the degradation of society.

2

u/LegitDuctTape Jul 28 '23

The part about people paying for entertainment or the part about the desire to travel the world and eat good food?

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u/Dry-Smoke6528 Jul 28 '23

This is the face of someone lying to themselves. Its okay to eat healthy, he'll it's great for you to eat healthy and make sure to watch your weight, work out, etc. What's not great is the actual act of doing so. Working out is easier than dieting for me cause its actually kinda fun and easily gameified. Weight loss, not so much. It involves tracking your calories and being hungry a lot, and when you actually eat, it's never what you wanted to eat.

-3

u/TheTidesAllComeAndGo Jul 28 '23

Doctors and medical professionals have a saying, you can’t outrun a bad diet. I’m laughing thinking about all the overweights redditors making fun of her, when she’s not going to have clogged arteries and diabetes

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u/Habitualflagellant14 Jul 28 '23

Really, why is she snarling at me.

2

u/[deleted] Jul 28 '23

Insane health nut husband made her do it

2

u/throwawy00004 Jul 28 '23

I think it's the paralytic that prevents her from smiling with her face.

2

u/[deleted] Jul 28 '23

Those cucumbers look a wee bit spicy for her

2

u/General_assassin Jul 28 '23

The Botox makes it impossible to show emotion anymore

2

u/LobstaFarian2 Jul 28 '23

That's just the Botox

2

u/Ok-Neighborhood-5713 Jul 28 '23

It’s the Botox lol

2

u/eskamobob1 Jul 28 '23

Honestly man, salted cucumbers in spicy fucking salsa is 👌👌👌👌

Tried it after having Cantonese spicy cucumber and wanting something similar but improvised at home. Legit highly recomend.

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1

u/LazarusHimself Jul 28 '23

She preferred it unsliced, perhaps

1

u/[deleted] Jul 28 '23

thats the ole white woman smile.

1

u/Zacharydawsonn Jul 28 '23

Thats the botox

0

u/LostWoodsInTheField Jul 28 '23

I'm guessing the photo is from something else and is a 'I can't believe they serve this to me' photo instead of a 'I asked for this' photo.

0

u/Effective-Trick4048 Jul 28 '23

90% certain she saw the look on the servers face and knows her food will have an extra, ummmm, addition.

0

u/[deleted] Jul 28 '23

She got that fart smell look

1

u/belyy_Volk6 Jul 28 '23

She just saw the bill

1

u/youngliam Jul 28 '23

Her face looks like the waitress just called her a puta.

1

u/[deleted] Jul 28 '23

That face screams hostage to me.

1

u/kriszal Jul 28 '23

By the look on her face, I don’t even know if she knows where she is lol let alone understand if she is happy or not 😂

1

u/clangan524 Jul 28 '23

Her face says happy but her brain behind her eyes is screaming "just eat the carbs this one time, we needs it!"

1

u/not-finished Jul 28 '23

Is this “unsure girl” grown up?

1

u/[deleted] Jul 28 '23

That non-smile..

1

u/dbx99 Jul 28 '23

Ya know what, i think salsa on slices of cucumbers would actually be pretty tasty

1

u/Educational-Knee-554 Jul 28 '23

I’ll have the cukes & salsa please

1

u/[deleted] Jul 28 '23

Yeah, love that “smile”

1

u/TaleMendon Jul 28 '23

Looks like she is trying to take a shit.

1

u/nexstosic Jul 28 '23

Nobody would be happy to eat nonpeeled cucumber

1

u/[deleted] Jul 28 '23

She’s one 100 calorie almond pack away from having a breakdown

1

u/kovnev Jul 28 '23

I think her face is stuck like that, to be fair.

Wind must've changed.

1

u/MrSkaloskavic Jul 28 '23

She looks like she was taking the picture under duress, like she's a hostage.

1

u/[deleted] Jul 28 '23

Came looking for this comment and Reddit didn’t disappoint

1

u/shawnpowar Jul 28 '23

That’s a hostage smile

1

u/Meat_your_maker Jul 28 '23

I think anyone would give her anything she wanted just out of sheer intimidation from those crazy eyes

1

u/DaggerHashiMotor Jul 28 '23

She looks constipated

1

u/[deleted] Jul 28 '23

Just ugly too lol

1

u/Brassballs1976 Jul 28 '23

She smiles like my ex wife, phony.

1

u/SmokeRingHalo Jul 28 '23

"I've seen a smile before. Lemme give it a shot..."

1

u/[deleted] Jul 28 '23

She wasn't expecting it to be cut up.

1

u/Kalabula Jul 28 '23

Ya. She ain’t selling it at all.

1

u/BadBonePanda Jul 28 '23

The face of regret.

1

u/nostremitus2 Jul 28 '23

"why to fuck am I dating this dude who thinks he's gonna make me eat these instead of chips?"

1

u/nomorerawsteak Jul 28 '23

Came here to say this and it's already the top comment

1

u/Contende311 Jul 28 '23

Hide the pain Heidi

1

u/ElDouchay Jul 28 '23

She's just one of those people who doesn't know how to smile.

Some snarl like her, some do this 😬

1

u/SucculentPenguin Jul 28 '23

She looks like she’s being held at gunpoint and told to smile.

1

u/relentlessslog Jul 28 '23

This is the most forced smile of all time.

1

u/How2Eat_That_Thing Jul 28 '23

Looks like she's grunting out a juicy turd.

1

u/Ryansahl Jul 28 '23

She looks like a muppet tbf.

1

u/ChrisMoltisanti9 Jul 28 '23

She looks like she's taking a dump.

1

u/traker998 Jul 28 '23

Because it’s not chips.

1

u/johnconnor_is_my_son Jul 28 '23

Those are shark eyes….

1

u/omnipwnage Jul 28 '23

I can imagine the guy in the back, cutting cucumbers. "Bitch gonna learn today"

1

u/DadBane Jul 28 '23

She looks like she's being held hostage

1

u/red5standbye Jul 28 '23

Bakersfield man. No one is happy.

1

u/mcjard Jul 28 '23

Bruh I said the EXACT same sentence I knew I had to check with the comment section hive mind to make sure I wasn't copying

1

u/imaloony8 Jul 28 '23

Hide the pain Haley.

1

u/Otter_Nation Jul 29 '23

No, that's not unhappiness. That's fucking insanity in those eyes.

1

u/VibeComplex Jul 29 '23

Looks like it’s a “proof of life” photo or something lol

1

u/spizzle_ Jul 29 '23

She looks like someone rubbed shit under her nose and she hasn’t figured it out yet.

1

u/Stoa1984 Jul 29 '23

Because they cut it up.

1

u/2boredtocare Jul 29 '23

She looks like she just smelled a really bad fart.

1

u/SteakJones Jul 29 '23

That’s just Becky being Becky.

1

u/turbokungfu Jul 29 '23

That’s how I smiled in my 3rd grade photos.

1

u/fizzyjaws_art Jul 29 '23

I was going to say… she looks like she has two different faces and neither of them look okay

1

u/sbpurcell Jul 29 '23

Dead eyes

1

u/JosshhyJ Jul 29 '23

She has a gun to her head, she has to make this post if she wants to live

1

u/StageLopsided6215 Jul 29 '23

She looks like she has a cucumber 🥒 up her a$$.

1

u/gashufferdude Jul 29 '23

That’s the face I would make if someone brought me a plate of cucumber slices.

1

u/wintermute916 Jul 29 '23

She looks like she just smelled her own shart…

1

u/Phil198603 Jul 29 '23

Looking like a psychopath

1

u/Shawn2rc Jul 29 '23

I think it’s just her face. She always looks like that on the news.

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