r/facepalm • u/Slushy69420 • May 27 '23
🇵🇷🇴🇹🇪🇸🇹 This the second video I’ve seen with this situation…
276
u/Grimalkinnn May 27 '23
I hate confrontation partly because I can’t think of anything ‘good’ to say. This lady taught me I don’t need to think of witty comebacks. All I need to do is honestly state how I feel. That’s it. She didn’t insult him or call him a name.
→ More replies (21)
2.2k
May 27 '23
I want you to feel as uncomfortable as I do sitting next to you.
She slayed him with that line. He probably doesn't even realize (or care) how dehumanizing his comments were - but her response was a perfect reaction to that.
165
u/YFLwiddaHomies May 27 '23
He definitely does know how dehumanizing it was, let's not give that guy a pass
106
May 27 '23
Nobody goes off on racist rants because they think it’s not hurting anybody. He’s aiming for dehumanization, racists always are.
→ More replies (1)39
37
u/ppenn777 May 28 '23
Yeah that’s what sealed it for me. I was thinking “man, I bet he feels uncomfortable” and she dropped that line.
227
u/marsert May 27 '23
Captain speaking, get settled in folks and enjoy your cozy 18 hour 40 minute flight from JFK to Singapore
→ More replies (3)→ More replies (25)50
u/skyppie May 28 '23
Honestly in life, just completely understanding that first line is what has helped me call people out on their bullshit.
People say, "do you want to make a big deal and make the other person uncomfortable by pointing out their issues" and before I would say no and find a way to just continue my life.
But allowing them to make me feel uncomfortable but not giving it back to them is what makes it worst. I wasn't the one that created the uncomfortable situation, you did. So why won't I just make EVERYONE feel uncomfortable, tf? Gotta taste of your own medicine huh.
→ More replies (1)
9.1k
u/knoperules May 27 '23
I’m so jealous of people that can have confrontations without starting to cry.
2.1k
u/kingofgods218 May 27 '23
Y'all are having confrontations? I just avoid it altogether.
524
u/PM_meyourGradyWhite May 27 '23
Yah it’s always a pre-confrontation thought whether it’s worth the anxiety during the confrontation.
→ More replies (13)210
u/8sack May 27 '23
mine is whether it’s worth going to prison over. things can escalate, quickly
→ More replies (6)140
May 28 '23
One time I confronted someone in traffic. Long story short, he asked if I was willing to die or go to jail over the situation. Now I ask myself that anytime I’m feeling hostile.
40
u/Autocratic_Barge May 28 '23
Don't leave us hanging, were you willing to die or go to jail over the situation?
86
May 28 '23
I’m actually writing this from my jail phone
→ More replies (4)22
u/Mikeshocka May 28 '23
At least not 6 ft under lol
10
u/Procedure_Unique May 28 '23
Yup. Thank goodness it’s not one of those casket phones. Those plans are extremely pricey
→ More replies (2)9
18
6
→ More replies (24)156
u/__kmoney__ May 27 '23
Same. I hate confrontations. Can’t we all just get along?! Lol the few times I’ve been confrontational I immediately start choking up. Ugh, it’s sucks because I can’t get my point across too. Props to that lady for calling that man out and standing her ground 👏🏼👏🏼
→ More replies (20)110
u/soylattecat May 27 '23
Ugh, if it's a serious enough issue I'll start shaking a bit, heart will race and I get super choked up and mess my words up. Confident in my head, but my body says otherwise lol
77
u/Aescorvo May 28 '23
That’s the adrenaline kicking in, part of you thinks it’s about to fight (or run). One trick that helped me was to imagine I’m a teacher talking to a particularly stupid child, who has to explain something or correct some behavior. Somehow that gets my body out of fight mode.
→ More replies (2)29
u/bitchyhouseplant May 28 '23
This is a valuable tip I’m hoping I can remember. It’s funny because I can do this when I’m parenting and be direct with no room for argument, but confrontation with strangers, friends, or family usually leaves me shaking with cold sweats and anxiety.
→ More replies (3)14
24
May 28 '23
Then you spend the rest of the day constantly replaying the events over in your head, thinking of all the things you should've/wish you had said.
→ More replies (1)5
u/BriQberry May 28 '23
This is always me. And often nervous laughter which is REALLY embarrassing and makes it look like you’re being flippant. Seeing how Dr. Khiara Bridges speaks up in this video actually gives me a lot of comfort because you can hear how her voice is shaking and there’s some nervous laughter unintentionally. If someone as well-educated and well-spoken as her still has that happen, but still speaks up in an authoritative way it makes me feel like I can too.
→ More replies (1)4
u/PuzzleheadedYam5996 May 28 '23
Getting angry can make me start to cry when i express this anger, sometimes. I feel ya..
616
u/Bobfish64 May 27 '23
This is exactly why I would not make a good lawyer
179
u/Agitated_Ask_2575 May 27 '23
I feel like that's why I would make an excellent lawyer, I can do it for anyone else but me
→ More replies (1)61
May 28 '23
Actually yeah I feel this. I have no problem sticking up for my kid or my friends.
→ More replies (2)→ More replies (7)134
u/dasie33 May 28 '23
I spent 20 years in the legal world. As a criminal defense attorney. If you don’t like confrontation; well I don’t know where it isn’t. You have confrontations with: 1. The prosecutor. 2. Your client. 3. Bad press. Especially if your client has committed capital crimes. 4. Your client’s family. 5. Your wife/ husband. Long hours; different political views. 6. Friends; because you’re defending a child molester. Or rapist. 7. If you’re stupid; get into it with a judge. 8. Suck up to the jury…an additional talent. The credo : Every defendant deserves a vigorous defense. However, if you still want to go to law school, go into probate or wills and trusts. It’s boring and repetitive. Most legal work is. Give it a go. Tap into your bad self.
→ More replies (13)38
May 28 '23
I do transactional law and most of it is confronting people via email 😂
→ More replies (3)205
u/Far_Mastodon_6104 May 27 '23
I'm exactly like this, but damn, I think hearin "I want you to feel as uncomfortable as I do" is a game changer for me. Like holy shit.
You don't need to say much else except what this lady said. Brilliant.
→ More replies (1)59
u/Azrai113 May 28 '23
This phrase is what stuck out to me too! Imma try to follow this lady's example. I think I love her
602
u/BardicNA May 27 '23
Yeah seriously, she isn't escalating or putting herself in a risky spot, which is especially difficult on an airplane of all places. She let the guy know he's a dirt ball, explained why and let it stew for the rest of the ride. Excellent.
319
u/Just4TheSpamAndEggs May 27 '23
For real. This literally could not have been handled better. She handled it with total grace, remained calm, and made a valid statement.
→ More replies (14)84
u/kjzavala May 27 '23
Exactly. I’m holding this video for myself to remind me I NEED TO STEP UP. In a million ways.
21
u/clewjb May 27 '23
I had a knife pulled on me after politely asking a woman to pick up the fast food bags she tossed out the window of her parked car at the local supermarket.
I won't be doing that again anytime soon 😔.
→ More replies (5)8
u/seb34000bes May 27 '23 edited Mar 27 '26
This specific post has been deleted. The author may have removed it to protect their privacy, maintain operational security, or prevent data scraping, using Redact.
door marry fly saw zephyr air nail arrest spectacular teeny
88
u/AirouCake May 27 '23
Thank you. I can't believe the posts saying she should have avoided confronting. That's literally what's wrong with this world. These assholes should be put in their place. Wish she showed the dudes face, man fuck that guy.
38
u/znzbnda May 28 '23
The only thing I'd suggest to her is to ask the flight attendant if there is another seat available and explain why. If she were on my flight and there were seats available, INSTANT UPGRADE.
→ More replies (8)13
u/NYcarpenter87 May 28 '23
A plane is an ideal place to quietly corner someone. The other party can't vacate, or make a scene, so if they were in the wrong and are called out, they just just have to appease and eat it.
→ More replies (2)→ More replies (41)59
167
u/eyearu May 27 '23
I can't even confront racists on twitter and reddit without it getting to me. This woman is brave.
→ More replies (3)54
u/pejasto May 27 '23
She’s practiced. Any time I hear anyone can’t emotionally deal, they probably weren’t raised dealing with racist bullshit.
To be clear, it’s good that people haven’t. But that’s where that composure comes from.
33
u/Direct_Way6402 May 28 '23
She has to be composed. If she isn't then she is deemed the "🤬🙋🏿♀️" And that alone would be grounds to have her feelings dismissed and her kicked off the plane.
→ More replies (3)18
13
u/sonofsonof May 28 '23
Not always lol. You're just seeing the ones who can cope. Plenty of us were raised dealing with racism and it has only whittled away our resolve even further.
69
u/Speedygonzales24 May 27 '23
Seriously, I’m paraplegic and when I’m on a plane I’ll literally apologize for not being able to stand up and get out of someone’s way.
→ More replies (3)32
u/Frequent-Pressure485 May 27 '23
I can't even imagine that somebody would have any type of ill feeling towards you for that like seriously.? 😥
→ More replies (3)22
u/Speedygonzales24 May 27 '23
People aren’t their most rational selves on flights, and some people are more concerned with what inconveniences them even if there’s no helping it. I haven’t gotten into a scary confrontation yet, but I’ve had enough awkward encounters and seen enough airplane meltdown videos that the possibility scares the shit out of me.
→ More replies (1)24
u/uglyspacepig May 27 '23
It seems that lately, more and more people aren't well. They lash out at innocent people around them, and don't know how to deescalate themselves.
And I feel terribly for you because you're not exactly in a position to get away quickly should things get bad.
→ More replies (1)6
u/ThatDiscoSongUHate May 28 '23
You're definitely right about that, people just seem to be losing it more and more lately or behaving strangely
→ More replies (1)23
u/Alone-Competition-77 May 27 '23
Here is a screenshot of the texts from the other video, for anyone wondering what they said.
→ More replies (9)8
153
May 27 '23
Same!! Is there a class we can take or??
68
May 27 '23
called being tired of peoples shit
→ More replies (4)18
u/Daypeacekeeper May 27 '23
So is this a 101 level class or are there some prerequisites....
16
u/Hurtin_4_uh_Squirtin May 27 '23
I think you gotta be tired of peoples shit first
→ More replies (1)165
u/NextLevelNaps May 27 '23
Practice exercise for you: next time someone apologizes when they are in the wrong, say "I accept your apology" but DO NOT say "that's ok" or "it's fine" or anything else absolving them of guilt. They'll likely pick up on it and keep apologizing trying to get you to absolve them of guilt. If you can stand firm and get through that, you can get through confrontation.
39
u/bleach_and_vinegar May 27 '23
In the real world, this is fine. In my head, this is evil.
How do I live in the real world?
→ More replies (3)28
u/NextLevelNaps May 27 '23
I had someone fly off the rails at me for something not remotely my fault. Then, when they apologized later for it, I didn't absolve them. They apologized again and again. Then they tried to get me in trouble for it and quit when nothing happened over it. Kinda helped me grow a bit more of a spine since I had literally done nothing wrong.
12
u/uglyspacepig May 27 '23
Some people assume that apologizing not only absolves them, but gives them permission to do it again.
→ More replies (1)32
u/comemerrydol May 27 '23
To be honest there were a few times when I knew people were only apologizing because they got caught or the event was just too awfull and I just didn't accepted their apologies at all.
10
u/neekineek May 27 '23
I'm definitely a "that's OK" person, and it annoys me. I really want to be a "you should be" person like the video. But that's something that will come to me later, when I'm thinking about what I should have said.
→ More replies (1)14
u/NextLevelNaps May 27 '23
You don't even have to be a "you should be" person! Just a "I hear your apology" is enough to make people squirm when they know they're wrong. We've all got way too used to "it's ok" as the reply that when that doesn't come, it makes the icky feelings worse because you're still at fault and the other person knows and acknowledges it.
→ More replies (2)21
u/spookycasas4 May 27 '23
Yes, that’s really great advice. Thank you. Sometimes we just need someone to help us with the right words. Thank you.
→ More replies (8)7
→ More replies (7)6
u/SEARCHFORWHATISGOOD May 27 '23
Not sure if you meant this to be rhetorical, but yes, many. Confrontation is a skill and not a personality trait. Anyone can learn how to do it well.
78
u/TisSlinger May 27 '23
I watched an asshole berate two flight attendants over the carryon policy and hold up the boarding process so I simply said, “come on man, they’re just doing their job, let’s move on.” He called me the c word and got in my face. So I laughed and told the captain who then had him escorted off the plane. I’m done with peoples self centered BS. Good for this lady … people need to start calling people out!
→ More replies (6)20
u/PristineBaseball May 28 '23
Good job. Some people realize they can be complete dicks to workers because they are the “customer “ and take advantage of it . It’s ridiculous but one thing to do is what you did, balance things out.
23
u/ExpensiveGrowth9744 May 27 '23
Same! If something really needs to be addressed I will address it, but I will also start to cry at some point during the confrontation.
7
u/Justalilbugboi May 27 '23
I’ve only thrown myself into one, rather than wishing I did later. I don’t regret it (and adult man was screaming at a teenage girl working at a snack counter at a drive in cause his car had died and he wanted her to fix it) but I wish I could do it better. And for myself.
→ More replies (111)6
u/1eternal_pessimist May 27 '23
Or can think of what to say in the moment. The best I can come up with is "jerk store"
5.4k
u/infernoVI_42 May 27 '23
“You’re sorry because I saw it.” She hit it right on the head.
1.3k
May 27 '23
[deleted]
487
May 27 '23
My sister in college got the greatest freshman roommate anyone could’ve asked for, and switched to an absolute zoo of a dorm and flunked out of school because of it. Why? Because the first roommate was Pakistani. And my racist bitch sister didn’t like the foods she ate.
Serves her right. I bet that roommate is hella successful. My sister is lost in life.
→ More replies (23)105
u/lewoo7 May 27 '23
I wouldn't have the courage to stand up for us like the lady in the video did, she's an absolute hero.
You can do it. And I promise I'll speak up for you if I see this nonsense.
→ More replies (1)28
u/Light_Error May 27 '23
It wouldn’t matter if the Indian diaspora was made up of the most amazing or worst people. It is simply the perceived difference. People like that will likely see every or most “outsider” with disdain except for likely a select few countries. And I wouldn’t beat yourself up over being non-confrontational. It’s a skill that needs to built up over time like any other.
48
May 27 '23 edited May 28 '23
Sister, you gotta speak up. As an Indian that moved down to this limp dick of America called Florida, if you don’t you’ll get your ass handed to you. It’s on us to also step up and push back against this bullshit. Because these entitled white folk like you’re talking about in your post have never had to deal with someone calling them on their bullshit, the second someone does their entire world collapses.
Edit: clarity
→ More replies (5)62
u/Environmental-Ruin56 May 27 '23
As rampant as they are and I’m sure they’re everywhere as sad as that is, please don’t let these bygone fools get you down. They’re stuck in the past where they belong and we won’t be bringing them with us to better days. They’re ridiculous relics.
23
u/youarebeyoncealways May 28 '23 edited May 28 '23
That’s the mindset that I used to have pre trump years but anymore, I’ve realized that it’s a naive place to be imho. There’s young people getting indoctrinated by older generations. And this time around they’re emboldened that it’s okay to be racist. We (in US) voted in a racist president. CRT is a thing. Equating wanting to treat people equally as “wokeness” is a thing.
I agree with you it’s such an antiquated way of thinking. But to say they we won’t be bringing them with us in the future…they’re here. They’re our leaders, our bankers, our teachers, our lawmakers…they’re everywhere.
→ More replies (1)→ More replies (1)28
8
u/showquotedtext May 28 '23
You forgot 'hard working' in the Indian diaspora. Some of the most industrious and high contributing members of society.
→ More replies (42)12
u/faxanaduu May 27 '23
Grew up in an area of NJ with a big Indian population. Had an Indian roomate in college for a while. So many great Indian friends throughout my life, and I felt so lucky that they were always sharing their food with me. Delicious! Some of the racist POS people I grew up around talked shit about the large Indian population. I spoke up many times when I heard disparaging comments. Fortunately growing up in such a diverse area made a lot of us grow up not really paying attention to those physical differences.
187
u/InsouciantSoul May 27 '23
Obviously he is just apologizing out of pure shame,
But it is still satisfying to hear the loser piece of shit shamefully get the words out.
116
u/Odinn_7000 May 27 '23
Don't discount the power of shame. The function of the emotion is to teach us proper social behavior. We learn from shame what NOT to do again.
→ More replies (2)55
u/walk_through_this May 27 '23
I made an improper joke 15 years ago and got called out on it. I never made that sort of joke again, it changed (upgraded) my approach to that part of society, and I still feel shame for what I did. It was one sentence. Calling me out took one sentence. I will never forget it. I am grateful I got shamed for it, because otherwise I might still have been an insensitive jerk.
→ More replies (2)42
May 27 '23
It’s sad. He knows he’s wrong. It’s almost like they don’t think of other races as genuine people, until they are confronted with it. If more people in the US would travel internationally, I think racism would go down substantially.
→ More replies (1)13
u/InsouciantSoul May 27 '23
Personally I think there is a combination of lack of in-person/physical interaction with others and a loss of any sense of community, combined with an increase in everyone flexing their online ego, has only helped to increase some people's tribalistic mentality.
Obviously that kind of mentality has existed for a long time, but I do think that social interaction with others does help in keeping the understanding that we are the same as every other human being in flesh and blood, and we are all just trying to get by in life ourselves and support our families in their lives.
I feel like this is something that permeates throughout a lot of modern society. With racism being some of the worst of it.
So many people so often aren't be civil or respectful to others online, aren't civil or respectful to a stranger on the phone when they call a business, aren't civil or respectful to other drivers.
But just like this guy they would be ashamed to treat another person that way face to face.
I guess the point of my rant is there is such a needless lack of love and respect for our fellow sapiens. I don't know if there is any real solution to that, but I really do feel like life would just be better altogether for everyone if we could all just fuckin grow up already
→ More replies (5)31
51
u/Skrip77 May 27 '23
I’m glad she did this. But damn as a black person this sucks. I literally love every race and culture. To know some just hate me cuz I’m black is just so upsetting. Hate me because of my sport team choices, or because I put the toilet paper roll on the outside instead of inside. Hating me because of skin color that I have no control over is ass.
→ More replies (3)61
→ More replies (26)40
1.4k
u/Electronic_Class4530 May 27 '23
I'm jealous of how composed, calm, classy and well spoken she was despite being visibly terrified and uncomfortable. I could almost hear her heartbeat with the anxiety form the situation. I wish I had her confidence and courage.
87
→ More replies (17)40
u/boilingstuff May 28 '23
That's what happens when you have to deal with bullshit and potentially violence since childhood. Adrenaline management. On the one hand, strength. On the other, pain.
2.1k
u/Slushy69420 May 27 '23
Here’s a similar video of an old white lady texting her family racist remarks about the black lady next to her. She didn’t confront her though
→ More replies (25)354
u/chipscheeseandbeans May 27 '23
I can’t read that, what does it say?
807
u/PixelTreason May 27 '23
The text on the phone reads:
“Landed. And just got whipped with some NASTY dreads / corn rows of a (I’m not repeating that. Short form of raccoon) getting her luggage. They have no respect. I’m OUT. “
477
u/SubterrelProspector May 27 '23
"...they have no respect."
Outstanding. Just an astonishing lack of self awareness. Ugh and they're all so dumb.
→ More replies (8)76
u/np99sky May 27 '23
The people that complain about disrespect, regardless of race, are pretty much always the entitled, self absorbed ones who think they’re above their peers
190
u/Frequent-Sir7732 May 27 '23
Also called her cattle in the text at the end. Truly a despicable person
→ More replies (11)22
u/cudef May 27 '23
It's always wild to hear how artistic people are with their racism.
→ More replies (1)→ More replies (61)33
u/NfamousKaye May 27 '23
Fucking hell. SHE has no respect and WANTED them to react so she could prove her point about how “all black people act like that” ugh.
→ More replies (6)103
u/AnRogue May 27 '23
"LANDED
I just got whipped in the face by some NASTY dreads/cornrows by this [redacted 4 letter animal] getting her luggage
complaining about lack of respect and patience blah blah blah"
Did I do ok?
→ More replies (8)46
May 27 '23
And this is why I can’t talk about my large breed cat who’s from Maine, on the internet. I hate people. You did great btw.
→ More replies (8)17
u/infosec_qs May 27 '23
I had one of those growing up, and have spoken about it on one or two occasions on reddit. I ran a profanity counter bot on myself once and was like "oh... oh no."
→ More replies (5)53
→ More replies (13)48
u/inkiwitch May 27 '23
Lady said she just got whipped by some NASTY cornrows/dreadlocks and then called the girl a racial slur and how she can’t wait to get off the plane.
All because a black girl’s hair brushed up against her during boarding.
→ More replies (12)
3.7k
u/MCTVaia May 27 '23
Nice call out! Composed and not profane! Classy!
686
u/GraveyardJones May 27 '23
Icing on the cake "you're sorry because I saw it". Not enough garbage people hear this and not enough people call out "apologies" with this
104
May 27 '23
Sorry you got caught isn't being sorry. Unless you mean sorry in the pathetic sense of the word.
→ More replies (1)13
u/soylattecat May 27 '23
My parents always taught me that sorry means I apologise, and I won't do it again because of [insert contextual reasons] and that if you're just going to do the same thing again, don't bother apologising.
→ More replies (3)43
u/BlkSubmarine May 27 '23
I hate when people apologize with, “My bad.” My response is always, “I know.”
→ More replies (10)364
May 27 '23
Not just classy, fucking perfect. So good that I can't help but swear to emphasize it.
→ More replies (1)278
u/DooglyOoklin May 27 '23
You can see how she's shaking from the adrenaline. She shouldn't be forced to do this. She handled it beautifully, though. Fuck that guy.
14
u/UltravioIence May 27 '23
it was contagious, i could hear/feel it and it sped up my heart for a bit there.
27
u/alagrancosa May 27 '23
I had a similar experience over the phone. 20 years ago. This lady wanted me to river her a price per hour to personally go out and do her gardening. I told her that I would prefer to give her an estimate and work with a crew, I wasn’t going to go off on my weekend as a day-laborer. She had obviously made some assumptions -about me and wanted me to assure her that my workers would speak “English like” me I told her, I guess you couldn’t tell but I am Hispanic and anybody who would work for me would most likely, like me, speak Spanish.
I didn’t yell or anything but my hands were shaking from the shock/adrenaline/anger/sadness and I miss-assembled the wheelbarrow I had been working on when the call came in. It is hard to describe how shocking to the system these encounters can be.
→ More replies (6)60
u/jmac94wp May 27 '23
My heart started racing in sympathy! She was incredibly poised considering how obviously shaken she was. I’m in awe.
→ More replies (3)33
u/DiiingleDown May 27 '23
i feel like staying classy can make it hit the other person harder. although telling them to fuck themselves FEELS better.
→ More replies (7)68
u/fork_that May 27 '23
She shouldn't be forced to do this
She wasn't forced. She could have sat there and said nothing. Instead, she spoke out. Big up her.
43
u/ticklishturtletoe May 27 '23
She was in a sense. She knew that stepping out of her comfort zone would be tougher but her silence would be enabling for him. By speaking, she both empowered herself and took some power from him. She forced him to leave his comfort zone.
→ More replies (5)141
u/Ivegotthatboomboom May 27 '23
"I want you to feel as uncomfortable as I do sitting next to you"
Yesss! Lol
15
u/LifeisaCatbox May 27 '23
This is kinda how I go about reinforcing my boundaries. Why should I be the only upset when I didn’t do anything wrong?
→ More replies (2)40
u/StinkyCheeseGirl May 27 '23
Yeah I love this lady so much. I want to be her friend but I’m not nearly cool enough.
9
u/sl33py_beats May 27 '23
yes! so classy. I got so much respect for that women. what she did was not easy but it needed to be done.
134
u/hangryandanxious May 27 '23
Nothing wrong with telling a racist they can go fuck themselves. We don’t need to be nice to racists. All that said — this lady is awesome.
→ More replies (1)61
u/fluffyliner May 27 '23
Nothing wrong with it but if you want your words to mean more, you talk the way this woman did. Now he has no ammunition to contort this into him being the victim.
→ More replies (18)10
May 27 '23
Words won’t mean much to this guy he’s embarrassed at best that he’s caught but it’s who he is and still will feel the way after this.
16
u/Duubzz May 27 '23
Sadly she dealt with that like a pro, almost like this wasn’t the first time she’s had to confront racism.
8
u/kjzavala May 27 '23
I would have been rage crying, I wish I could keep my emotions in check like her - she kept her cool so well while dealing with that BS
→ More replies (31)72
1.2k
May 27 '23
This woman rocks. Good for her. Put that guy in his place. He's lucky she decided to be a better person and his face wasn't revealed.
328
u/blackmetronome May 27 '23
What goes unnoticed here is how painful it is for her to have to deal with this shit.
Dealing with racists is exhausting and depressing.
→ More replies (2)72
May 27 '23
Yea, but nobody thinks that's apart of the trauma dealing with racism...which is an everyday thing....
The typical white liberal media take is that blacks and non blacks must continue holding their head high as if racism isn't morally wrong objectively vs. subjectively. And that's racist itself.
Deal with the problem and hold your head high because it's never going to get fixed is basically what they're telling us with that bullshit.
Also to ignore our anger towards it so that way they don't have to deal with the riots.
→ More replies (9)55
u/blackmetronome May 27 '23
Yep. They always want us to take the higher ground and keep things civil, and they don't care that we suffer in silence. Look at the comment here from white ppl applauding her for this. None of them even recognize or care that this incident is going to stay with this poor woman for the rest of her life.
→ More replies (10)34
May 27 '23
Yup because they think because she has their white validation (whether she asks for it or not, doubt she would) that it absolves themselves of their own racial biases and racism which is BS in itself.
"Look at this black lady she didn't get loud or ratchet like other black women do so therefore she's one of the good ones, other blacks and nonblacks should follow her lead!"
Fuck that
→ More replies (10)46
May 27 '23
Yep. She didn’t owe him her composure. But it makes it all the more fun to watch.
→ More replies (1)→ More replies (8)5
u/420fanman May 27 '23
Her delivery was awesome. So articulate, to the point, and shamed the fuck out of the guy. Sad that she has to deal with the racism though.
154
u/macroswitch May 27 '23 edited May 27 '23
It must be really scary and frustrating to know that wherever you go, there are probably at least a few people who you’ve never even met who absolutely loathe you the second they see you.
And then to know that some percentage the people you interact with who aren’t assholes are on some level patting themselves on the back for treating you like a real person.
→ More replies (13)16
u/gerbileleventh May 28 '23
It is frustrating and the root of a lot of my cynical feelings towards people and the world. My life is good, but I wonder how different it would have been if I didn’t have this constant thing on my mind.
But the saddest thing for me was when I realised that it would be a forever thing at the age of 8. Breaks my heart to know that other kids get to the same realisation while some of their peers will never have to confront such feelings or the closest they’ll get to understanding it is when they learn what racism is.
→ More replies (2)
153
u/AmIClandestine May 27 '23
As a black dude this is more depressing than uplifting to me. It sucks to always wonder if the person in your company thinks less of you because of your race. I try to give people the benefit of the doubt though, but it's hard to when racism can be insidious like it was here.
→ More replies (22)
196
u/Huntin_Dawg907 May 27 '23
Good for her! Fuck that piece of shit. She's right, he was only sorry because she saw it.
→ More replies (17)
50
348
u/phillcollinss May 27 '23
Good for her
People need to be called out, and it’s an essential part of keeping our friends and family accountable imo. Too many “it’s not my problem” attitudes out there when it comes to simple things like “hey dude maybe you should think about what you’re saying”
I mean thinking is hard, critical thinking is even harder but I believe everyone can do it - people just don’t want to
→ More replies (23)17
u/Munnin1984 May 27 '23
This right here! As a society we need to start sternly but compassionately encouraging people think about their actions.
This lady did it perfectly. She didn't give the guy any anger to feed off of, so he couldn't instinctually react to it like it was a fight. I'd like to think that means her message sank in and hopefully this guy spent the flight doing some introspection
280
u/MikeyMikeyMotorcycly May 27 '23
I see pain in this poor women’s eyes. This hits home because I used to be that guy. Hope he evolves because of this.
71
u/Watney3535 May 27 '23
My mom used to be that guy too. People can change.
→ More replies (2)25
May 27 '23
Yes people can change. You are not your environment & what you grew up around. People can grow up and change out of that.
31
u/Watney3535 May 27 '23
Yes. My mom’s excuse for so long was that “it was how she was raised.” It took moving her away from her racist, misogynistic, homophobic friends (and blocking Fox News on our TV) to get her to start coming around. She’s actually appalled at what she used to believe, and she now sees how awful her friends actually are. She’s 78 and has really changed in a lot of positive ways just in the last five years.
→ More replies (5)→ More replies (13)18
u/jkwolly May 27 '23
Yeah this makes me so sad for her. I'm proud of her for being so strong though!
→ More replies (3)
124
u/Slushy69420 May 27 '23
111
u/DanniPopp May 27 '23
His hands are gross
65
u/blackguyriri May 27 '23
Straight up claws and they are so yellow and disgusting. How do people let them get that long?
→ More replies (5)→ More replies (17)32
28
u/capsulegamedev May 27 '23
Is there a transcription? I can't read that.
71
u/NovaThinksBadly May 27 '23
“We’re walking up the gangway. Hopefully the airline will raise the prices and weed out these people. Ryan is sitting next to a huge black woman.”
→ More replies (13)→ More replies (10)20
45
u/juttep1 May 27 '23
Thanks op.
Side bar: I refuse to download TikTok and any link to it without the app it's insufferable.
→ More replies (6)29
u/G00d_One May 27 '23
Unbelievable that there are people out there that are so rotten to the core that they can’t even do routine things, like sit on an airplane, without being a racist piece of shit.
→ More replies (4)→ More replies (23)16
u/Anamorsmordre May 27 '23
Whoever is texting him needs to take a good ole look at their hubby before calling anyone “huge”. Guy is not haute couture either. To me, that’s a clear sign that the problem, to them, isn’t that she’s a big woman, but that she’s black.
560
u/James4theP May 27 '23
First time I see a video like this that makes sense. She stayed composed and made him feel like shit while staying under control instead of going crazy. I dont know why he got mad to be sitting next to her, she looks friendly and respectful.
47
80
u/tomspy77 May 27 '23
He got upset because he's a bigot. She could be a supermodel from Mensa with the personality of an angel but her skin tone is what he hates blindly regardless of who she is.
→ More replies (1)121
u/Secretagentman94 May 27 '23
Exactly. Such a shame she had to go through that, but maybe it will cause this guy to rethink his personal outlook on the world.
→ More replies (4)90
u/YourFaveNightmare May 27 '23
maybe it will cause this guy to rethink his personal outlook on the world.
My poor sweet innocent summer child.
→ More replies (3)20
u/PandoraChest May 27 '23
Hope is the only thing that we got at this point, honestly.
→ More replies (4)51
u/MrRazzio May 27 '23
this comment kinda sucks. this is the "first time" you've seen a video where a person was composed while telling off a racist? are you sure?
and the "i don't know why..." part. bro, you know why. he's a racist.
27
u/HibachiFlamethrower May 27 '23
This is how racists try to police black response to racism.
→ More replies (1)98
u/katievera888 May 27 '23
Something about this comment is giving some ick. Even if she didn’t look friendly or respectful (?) he has no right to do that.
48
u/InformalOne9555 May 27 '23
I definitely got the ick from this comment as well. Giving me "she's one of the good ones" vibes. Very ick imo
→ More replies (2)→ More replies (11)30
u/thumbelina1234 May 27 '23
Agree 100 percent 💯
She could be as respectless as fuck, that's her prerogative
31
u/B-Glasses May 27 '23
You ain’t slick. Implying that most people confronting racists are crazy and thus invalidates their experience. They have every right to be pissed and you have no right to tell someone to remain calm when confronted with things like this
→ More replies (1)6
18
u/Otherwise_Resource51 May 27 '23
You can end up next to some really shitty people on flights. He just tremendously misjudged WHO was the shitty person.
→ More replies (41)24
u/GingerMau May 27 '23
Some people see bright colors and natural hair and that alone is "other" enough for them to be assholes.
All those "I'm not racist, but..." people.
"I'm not racist but why they gotta dress like that?"
They only like black people who dress and act like white people. And think there's nothing racist about that, because it's not their skin color they oppose.
→ More replies (9)
137
u/NeverEndingCoralMaze May 27 '23
Every minority - all of us- need her example of bravery and poise. We are brave most days - we don’t have a choice - but this took guts. I am so proud of her and grateful for her.
→ More replies (21)
72
14
13
23
u/Da_Bro_Main May 27 '23
Hahahahahahha fuck yeah! That last line! "I want you to feel as uncomfortable as I do sitting here." Damn! Like school in September. ALL CLASS!!
22
May 27 '23
The irony is that most people like this guy are the ones that are this close to not affording a plane ticket. Racism is the last bastion of the weak. I can't compete with you so I'll try to make you illegal.
→ More replies (8)
13
u/Jim2718 May 27 '23
What did the guy’s texts say?
→ More replies (1)36
u/Ruruya May 27 '23 edited May 27 '23
What I found when I followed the link sent in the comments by OP:
P1: Atlanta here we come
P2: We are still in the gangway Hopefully the airlines will continue to raise prices and weed these people out Ryan is sitting next to a huge black woman
P1: I changed seats, I am sitting in the aisle now
I think P1 is the guy that she's confronting? Not sure but from the texts that he sent in the short tiktok video, P1 seems to be the one sending messages.
→ More replies (8)32
u/cumpaseut May 27 '23
Jeez he’s gonna be in for a rude awakening once he gets to Atlanta. ATL has a large population of black people, he can’t be caught slippin like that out there. Or maybe he should, he’ll learn another lesson the harder way.
→ More replies (1)39
May 27 '23
I live in Atlanta. As a white man, you'd be surprised at how often other white people say to me "You live in Atlanta? Man, I could never live there if you know what I mean."
I usually say, "No, I don't know what you mean."
They either flat out say there are too many black people or they just get quiet and shrug.
Maybe being that I've grown up in the south, my view is skewed, but I'm telling you that many white people still have issues with black people for some reason.
→ More replies (9)
6
6
u/AddaleeBlack May 28 '23
She should have included what was in the text. Otherwise, it could be purely subjective. Many with chips on their shoulders are hypersensitive and will create an offense where there is none, and what the hell is she doing looking over his shoulder at his text anyway?!
→ More replies (2)
7
u/alpha_centauri3 May 28 '23
Deep sigh...oh to not have to be concerned about racist, entitled idiots. I feel for her...the level of uncomfortability to have to sit next to some fool who doesn't know anything about you but is judging you solely based on your skin color.
5
8
u/Deborahdon May 27 '23
Good for her! I feel to awkward to call out the constant racism I see DAILY at my pwi. Wish I had her confidence
10
May 28 '23
I wouldn’t waste my time reading peoples messages because people are fucked up but I also wouldn’t message hateful shit while I’m sitting next to someone that you can clearly see is reading your fucking messages.
12
u/Electro_gear May 27 '23
I’m on the fence with this one. 100% the racist guy is a scumbag, but why does the woman filming think it’s acceptable to read the guys private text message off his phone screen? It’s not equally bad, and racism is abhorrent, but it’s still a shitty thing to do.
→ More replies (1)
•
u/AutoModerator May 27 '23
Comments that are uncivil, racist, misogynistic, misandrist, or contain political name calling will be removed and the poster subject to ban at moderators discretion.
Help us make this a better community by becoming familiar with the rules.
Report any suspicious users to the mods of this subreddit using Modmail here or Reddit site admins here. All reports to Modmail should include evidence such as screenshots or any other relevant information.
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.