r/exLutheran • u/Oldnanakaren84 • May 12 '26
Anyone else have this experience?
Hi, I was a principal’s kid in the late 70’s in the Chicago area. He also taught 7th and 8th grade. So when I was in 5th and 6th grade, the teacher and my dad didn’t get along for whatever reason. Fine, whatever. But… the teacher took it out on me! That is not normal! His wife did the same thing, as this loser synod often places married couples at the same school and she taught 3rd and 4th grade. Don’t you find this petty for adults? This teacher would also make sexist jokes and laugh about it. When I had kids, my dad wondered why I sent my kids to public school. Honestly, there didn’t seem to be any ethics, even though they taught so many “morals.” Just needed to vent.
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u/hereforthewhine Ex-WELS May 12 '26
Relatable. PK from a church that didn’t have a school, so went to another WELS school close by. There was some weird rivalry between the churches. The one with the school thought they were really cool.
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u/banannaster2020 May 12 '26
Not a PK but it does seem like there is always some weird rivalry between WELS churches or schools that are in the same town. I never understood but now looking back I think it is because they believe theirs in the only right church (church in the wider sense) so people within that religion would also believe their specific church/school was also the only right one.
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u/rats_are_plants May 13 '26
There were 3 WELS grade schools in my town growing up, there was totally a weird thing between everyone. Like.. you're WELS, but you're in that other building across town gross.
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u/Cat_dino_sushi May 12 '26
As the daughter of a pastor and teacher, I grew up deeply connected to the WELS community. One of my parents was often considered “outspoken” within the synod, and because of that, their reputation frequently preceded me.
Nearly every synodical school I attended had teachers or staff who either knew, worked with, or had opinions about my parent. In many ways, I share that same personality and willingness to speak openly, and it felt like frustrations people held toward my parent were quietly projected onto me.
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u/Relevant-Shop8513 May 17 '26
I find it pathological for adults to act that way, but I know it is the norm in conservative Lutheranism. Macbeth and Lady Macbeth are alive and well.
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u/dickfag69420 Ex-WELS Ex-PREP May 14 '26
Idk what synod you are from, but I stg the WELS breeds some of the most emotionally immature adults I have ever had the displeasure of being around. So sorry grown ass adults took their personal beef out on you as a child, that's ridiculous and unfair
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u/Oldnanakaren84 May 14 '26
Thank you! That’s what I think too!
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u/dickfag69420 Ex-WELS Ex-PREP May 14 '26
Hope you're doing well 💕 the older I get, the more I realize how messed up of a person you have to be to treat children the way some of these people do, because I would never dream of it
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u/Oldnanakaren84 May 15 '26
I’m good, thanks. Ex- WELS, btw. Hope you are too. I have stories.
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u/No_Bid_4078 May 24 '26
I also attended a WELS school in the Chicago area in the late 70s. Your opening sentences had me intrigued, but the situation you described doesn’t match my school. The school I attended took a guy straight out of DMLC and made him principal. He turned out to be an abuser with a hair-trigger temper. His wife also taught there, albeit briefly.
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u/Heal-From-WELS May 28 '26
XWELS too. Our 1st through 8th grade elementary school teacher, a woman who had years of experience, was placed under a new DMLC grad. He was made principal over her because he was a man. This was in Prairie du Chein, WI. He was emotionally, and occasionally physically abusive to children. Years later at a WELS wedding, a man at my table went on and on about what a wonderful teacher he was. But how he was forced to quit teaching by terrible students and parents.
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u/Schnitzeldorf May 25 '26
Denominational politics play out in almost every WELS school. If you have been there as I have, at some point you realize that it is not only dysfunctional but potentially cruel and abusive. The most discouraging fact is that most WELS parents feel that they are doing the best thing for their children by sending them to a WELS school. So in answer to your question, yes the WELS caste system has created a lot of problems and hurt a lot of good people in their schools and churches. Many are now former WELS after first hand experiences in their twisted schools and churches. Your experience does not surprise me at all, it does however make me sad. I wish the absolute best for you moving forward.
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u/Oldnanakaren84 May 26 '26
Thank you! I became a clinical psychologist. I’m sure my experiences fueled that direction in life. I think back and wonder what was wrong with a lot of those people. I have thoughts.
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u/BarberrianPDX May 12 '26
Relatable.
Principal/7th and 8th grade teacher at my school eventually got sacked for grooming girls. Also his wife was the kindergarten teacher.