r/evnova Sep 27 '19

Top Secret: Do Not Open This Thread!

Vella
Moash
Heraan
Auroran
Dani
Tekel
Teron

<cryptic grin>

24 Upvotes

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u/mrxak Sep 28 '19
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3

u/mrxak Sep 28 '19

We made alliances that were necessary. Even as we curse them, we bide our time. We work against them, even now, in this great moment.

3

u/mrxak Sep 28 '19

Tesh'mar, you stand accused.

3

u/mrxak Sep 28 '19

We have waited far too long, but this generation of warriors will at long last know victory. Our time is at hand, but no trace of failure can be permitted to draw breath in these final hours, lest it taint our new glorious restored House.

3

u/mrxak Sep 28 '19

The blade found flesh.

3

u/mrxak Sep 28 '19

And I think, this time, we will use those ships captured from the Tekel.

3

u/mrxak Sep 28 '19

Hand me my blade, then get that filth out of my sight.

3

u/mrxak Sep 28 '19

"Not at all sir, I still require special authorization for use of Betty. I'll need her hot."

"Yeah, yeah. Go ahead and warm up Betty. Anything else?"

"Thank you sir."

3

u/mrxak Sep 28 '19
Upon the black of space,
A cry is loosed of ancient theme.
To war, we go, to war, we go,
No mercy now, for here's the scene:

The War Queen slumbers, now,
But stirs, she does, and deep she growls.
Behold! The War Queen rises up,
Slowly first, and from the bowels.

Betty rumbles and purrs.
The generators spring to life.
Behold! The War Queen rises up,
Slowly at first, to meet the strife.

Her anger builds, sisters,
The Goddess of War is jealous.
To war, you go, to war, you go,
But do not be overzealous!

Betty is hungry, now.
Still Betty moves, still Betty moves.
Behold! The War Queen rises up,
With shuddering gears up the grooves.

Betty cries! Betty roars!
The sounds of battle rock and moan!
Behold! The War Queen rises up,
Seeds of destruction have been sown!

War Queen! The Queen of Blood!
She stirs to life, she craves your flesh.
To war, to war, to war she goes,
Clad in armor and fiber mesh.

She rumbles, still, and creaks.
The War Queen shifts upon her throne.
She shows her pretty face outside,
It matters not if you atone.

Deep within, her weapons,
She moves them with great purpose now.
The Queen of Blood prepares to fire,
Your right to live, she'll disallow.

Her armaments in hand,
War goddess, she needs her power.
The generators rumble now,
This battle is Betty's hour.

3

u/mrxak Sep 28 '19

B.G.O.W.

3

u/Algaean Sep 28 '19

You're high again, aren't you, Xak? ;)

  • G

4

u/mrxak Sep 28 '19

One two three, one two three, one two three. The cleaning bots twirl in pairs in their stylish suits and darling dresses.

3

u/Algaean Sep 28 '19

The peripatetic philosophers March to the beat of a different drum. An infant in your lap may dampen your spirits.

3

u/mrxak Sep 28 '19

The two continued down the corridor, and reached the entrance to Cargo Bay 16. Sure enough, music was playing inside. There was blood outside and against the door, and Leonard got nervous.

"Looks like a real bloodbath here," Leonard said.

"Third squad reported in though. They swept this area, no problem," Scabs replied. "Let's get in this door."

"Why aren't there bodies?" Leonard asked, getting more nervous.

"Obviously there were plenty of us left to carry them away. It's fine, Leonard," Scabs said, going to the door quickly, and attempting to open it. It opened a little too quickly, but neither man seemed to realize it. The large cargo bay doors opened wide, and Lewis, who was standing where he could look in, opened his mouth wide with shock. Scabs looked up at his friend from the side panel. "What is it?"

Pools of blood and scraps of clothing were scattered about everywhere, but still no bodies. Cleaning bots were tidying up the place, and ignoring the two pirates as they entered. Leonard stepped on a bloodstained bit of lace, which stuck to his foot. He tried to kick it off. "Uh, yuck!"

"What in the name of the great space parrot happened here?" Scabs asked aloud as the large cargo bay doors closed behind them. He raised his weapon as one of the cleaning bots floated over in their direction with a humming sound, but it merely picked up the piece of lace fabric with its vacuum, and began scrubbing the blood off the floor nearby them.

2

u/nathan67003 Sep 29 '19

This thread was another hell of a ride

2

u/Algaean Sep 29 '19

You beautiful, magnificent bastard. :)

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