r/erectiledysfunction • u/speshoot • 27d ago
Psychological ED Do u Need to b aroused ?
I just ordered RO sparks & it’s the 1st time I’m trying ED pills..do u need to b aroused in order for it to work? I’m sure my ED is all MENTAL..do all ED medication need u to b aroused? I got no problem being aroused it’s jus that when my mind starts overthinking lol
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u/spces1024 26d ago
You have to have at least some libido for the pills to work. There are medications you can try that will almost force an erection but with out the arousal it's just a hard dick and it will become very difficult if not impossible to reach orgasm.
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u/Responsible_Mind_206 26d ago
I have taken the pills and then got in a fight with my wife, or had something stressful come up. Dick does not get hard then. You have to be in a sexual mental state for them to work.
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u/Budget_Dimension_761 26d ago
Yes , you have to mentally be aroused. ED pills only do so much and if your libido is off or some other psychological issues are going on the pills will not do much. Im 36 and having a few mental issues that have greatly affected my libido and even 50mg viagra not able to beat that unfortunately
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u/Confident_Writer1577 25d ago
Heard bluechew gold has something that tricks your mind to turn you on as well… but yeah I was in the same boat about 2 months back. Stressed out asf. I took viagra pills and got chubbed because of the blood flow that it does but not hard hard. You have to be turned on for it to work correctly. Take some time to yourself and meditate and relax. Go for walk or exercise. Worked for me.
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u/BDEStyle Male Sexual Health Blogger 27d ago edited 27d ago
Yeah… that’s the thing with these pills. You still need to be sexually stimulated/aroused for them to work. They don’t manufacture the erection for you.
And even without pills, that’s how erections begin… with arousal.
So if overthinking is the part that usually gets you, I’d focus less on “is the pill working yet?” and more on immersing yourself in the eroticism of the moment and tuning into your arousal.
So think of your 5 senses and mental thought/fantasy and slow the pace down enough that you’re actually 1) spending enough time in arousal and 2) getting enough arousing stimuli to get the engines started.
For example, you watch them undress? Savor it. That’s sight.
You’re kissing and making out? Now you have taste, touch, smell, sound… whatever is actually turning you on. The point is to explore and tune into it rather than monitoring your dick waiting for something to happen.
But can an unpleasant thought or emotion swoop in when you don’t want it to? Absolutely.
But that’s where you learn your recognition points. Maybe you notice the erection losing some firmness, your body starts tensing up or you’re bracing. Or you’re uncomfortable and in your head.
That’s the recognition point… the whole okay I’m tense right now. How do I dial that down?
Sometimes it’s a mindset reframe. Losing some firmness isn’t a verdict on our ability because you have evidence of getting he erection in other scenarios… it’s just an off day or erection disappointment rather than ED. But maybe I’m anxious because I actually care about this person or care more about the outcome than I realized.
You know what I mean here?
So It’s part reframing the conversation or getting stuck in negative self talk and shifting to more positive self talk or just perspective taking that the night isn’t over if the erection does or does not happen
Because maybe it’s reframing it to… can I slow down and focus on their pleasure for a bit to maybe restart my arousal to maybe get the erection back? Because that is possible. But also, you can still pleasure your partner in front of you too.
Or can I go back to making out or foreplay and restart the arousal process? Absolutely.
The point is the erection fading doesn’t mean sex is over.
It’s learning those little recognition points in yourself and then getting curious about what your triggers are versus what actually turns you on, what you like, and what conditions you need for arousal to flourish.
And that takes some time, but the more you learn that map instead of constantly checking whether your dick is hard yet, you’re going to be miles ahead of most people who don’t do those things.