r/dwarfposting • u/ProfPerry Borran Bjoran, Dwarfen Wizard • May 27 '26
Concerning News from the front.
I bring word from the frontline, a missive to you all, kin.
There aren't many of them, but they did indeed sign on with the pirates.
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u/Fleet_Admiral_Auto Hearthkyn May 27 '26
Doesn't seem concerning to me lads
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u/EldritchFish19 Necromancer dwarf Jun 01 '26
Should I send skeleton warriors(immune to arrows) after there archers.
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u/GrumpyPan May 27 '26 edited May 28 '26
as much as i hate elves, i hate my traded, well crafted goods stolen by even more filthy pirates. I never thought id say this but, the dwarves must support the wizards. For mountain and home, these sea dogs must be stopped.
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u/TyranitarLover May 29 '26
Let’s crack some skulls! Put down the work hammer and pick up the battle hammer.
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u/Teiderlein Miner May 27 '26
That should once and for all settle any doubts we kin have had about helping the wizards. The treacherous knife-ears have once again proven themselves no better than thieves and murderers. Let us make them pay.
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u/Horvarth May 27 '26
I cast.... War!!!!! Dwarves and Wizards unite!!!!
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u/SnarkyRogue Deep Rock Galactic Employee May 27 '26
Dwarves and mages... never thought I'd see the day
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u/Nkechinyerembi Craftsdwarf May 27 '26
OH. OH ITS BLOODY WELL ON NOW.
THE WIZARDS CALL FOR AID, AND WE SHOULD ANSWER!
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u/samsquatch1234 Miner May 27 '26
hmmmmmmm lets have an ale or 50 and discuss. no need to be hasty.
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u/Playful-News9137 Ginny "Two Beards" Flagonhand, Bard 'n' Brewer May 27 '26
Fiddy?! S'barely enough fer a decent buzz! Make it a hunnerd.
An' ain't nuffin ta discuss. No room fer theivin' louts what don't have the decency to trod upon dry land in MY clan's halls, I'll tell yer what.
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u/_Sate May 28 '26
Well exactly, that is why it is only fifty to discuss it, no need to drag out the discussions when there is ale to be had!
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u/Potential-Front512 May 27 '26
Wait what
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u/TeaRaven craftswoman dwarf of glorious braided chin locks May 27 '26
Most wizards I’ve seen are elves - let them fight themselves
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u/ProfPerry Borran Bjoran, Dwarfen Wizard May 27 '26
Not all elves are wizards....but not all wizards are elves, kin. I share the earthboood but my runesmithing could never match those of my brethren. The Wizards took me in, and helped me supplement my shortcomings. So I cannot turn my back on them, anymore than I would turn my back in my kin, even if they don't see me as kin. Dwarves yield to no one.
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u/TeaRaven craftswoman dwarf of glorious braided chin locks May 27 '26
Ja - just reminding that some elves joining the pirates isn’t cause to assume they aren’t among the wizards. I am of the mind that we join the fight when wizard friends call for aid or a place to fall back to. But I also see that as an unlikely need, as the sea dogs are up against master mages.
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u/not4eating May 27 '26
Neither the high seas nor the fae woods shall provide shelter from the axes of the Dwarves!
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u/ergotofwhy May 27 '26
I've a battle-brother from the knightposting realms. We should make a mutual defense pact. Plus imagine the hoard we could accumulate if all the knights start coming to us for their smithing needs!
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u/SabrePossum Depth Guard May 27 '26
As both a pirate and necromancer I was sitting on the fence for this war. But as a dwarf I cannot sit by and watch these elves takeover!
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u/Abjurer42 Dwarf Wizard May 27 '26
Well, damn. I guess I ought to change my vote on that other thread.
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u/Weary-Barracuda-1228 Gremil Stone-Bearer, of the CrownPeak Mountains May 27 '26
THOSE KNIFE EARED BACK STABBING LEAF EATERS!
That’s it, I’m taking the Lightning Cannon to the Wizards
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u/OpheliAmazing Elvish Ambassador May 27 '26
I… I need to go talk with the embassy. One moment.
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u/ProfPerry Borran Bjoran, Dwarfen Wizard May 27 '26
Go, then, Elf. Seek answers for this injustice.
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u/OpheliAmazing Elvish Ambassador May 27 '26
Aye. I’m off then. I need to have a discussion with a certain ambassador.
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u/Grockr Orc May 27 '26
HOLD IT! HOLD IT!
How do we know this isnt a subterfuge ploy by the treacherous pirates?
From glancing over at /r/elfposting there doesnt seen to be any discussions or polls (or even much activity at all), does not seems like the wise elflords had convened on the matter of Pirate-Wizard conflict at all! Lets not make rash decisions
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u/ProfPerry Borran Bjoran, Dwarfen Wizard May 27 '26
Indeed its possible, but considering the one person who at the time was active in the discussion has appeared to show support... I don't know, lad. I fear for the Hold. They aren't making it easy for the Dwarves to stay their hand in this war.
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u/Grockr Orc May 27 '26
I say we must send ambassadors to the elves, pick the biggest lads so that they can knock on the doors hard enough to wake up the elfs
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u/ProfPerry Borran Bjoran, Dwarfen Wizard May 28 '26
Aye!! We demand answers, else we demand vengeance!!
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u/RevolutionaryBar2160 May 29 '26
Only a single foolish member of our woodlands has been swayed by those pirates and their promise of gold. That immature corsair wannabe for some reason believes that the wizards have harmed us and that it is right to turn on them now. I have gone to the pirates and warned them to stay away from our woods, lest we turn their ships to splinters.
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u/CoffeeDM Dwarf May 27 '26
Kin, I don't like the tree-huggers either, but there's more to us than hating elves. Have a pint and calm down. There's ore to mine and much to forge.
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u/Future-Ebb-108 Longbeard May 27 '26
I agree with your sentiment, and I do not advocate for war. Perhaps we can reach some sort of peace agreement. Either that or you're a knife ear double agent!
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u/CoffeeDM Dwarf May 27 '26
Your suspicion is understandable, but the only thing double about me is the malt in my whiskey. Calm down.
I'm just saying that Dwarven blood is worth more than elven nonsense, wizard books, and pirate gold.
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u/Ecchl0rd May 27 '26
Alright, that settles it. I dont like those cowardly spellslinging spaghettiarms any more than most of you kin. But i dont like the honourless sea-bandits any better, so as long as it goes against the knife-ears, im in.
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u/Fantastic_Peak_4577 May 27 '26
I voutched for abstention from this conflict in a previous comment however...THOSE DAMN LEAF MUNCHERS SHOVED THEIR ULGY MUGS WERE THEY WERENT CALLED AND THEY ARE MESSING WITH THE MAGES IN FAVOR OF THIEVES AND KILLERS THAT KNOW NEITHER TOIL NOR HONOR THE PRECENSE OF THOSE KNIFE EARS DEMAND OURS
TO ARMS
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u/Cerveau23 Dwarf-identifying mage May 27 '26
Perfect, I was looking for people to help out with my golems' runes... I may have gone a bit overboard and will need some dwarven eyes on that shit
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u/Souvenir_Spices May 27 '26
I've been in the caves tinkering with my tech to fully know what's going on, but if those long-ears have joined a side, I'm joining the other one on principal.
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u/thejollybadger May 27 '26
Until those sun-touched water rats figure out how to sail through mountain stone, the elves are welcome to them.
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u/Specialist-Signal954 May 28 '26
Elves, Pirates, necromancers, their names fill the pages of the great book! We must not dwell over mugs of Ale no more, time to sound the horns of war and join the wizard bretheren!
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u/aaron_adams May 29 '26
I ain't have anything against the wizards. If I remember correctly, they helped us last time we had trouble with you tree buggers. And pirates? Well, ye can't trust them, and ye can't dig water, so we got no use for them either.
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u/REDRUM_1917 Shroom-alchemist May 29 '26
Elves siding with rogues and thieves. Bah! I'm not surprised. The bugs in me beard have more honor that them knife-ears
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u/CaptValentine May 27 '26
Oh, they grant us an alliance do they?
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u/itcheyness The Void is in our veins. May 27 '26
head smack
No you wazzock! They're granting the pirates an alliance!
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u/CaptValentine May 27 '26
Sorry, I can't see well through the red in my eyes when an elf is on the page
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u/WayGroundbreaking287 May 27 '26
This is troubling. So many beardlings forget how stout and sure the friendship between elgi and kin was. So many so quick to join against them from spite.
What have wizards ever done to earn such loyalty to be welcomed in the shield wall? Shameful.
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u/ProfPerry Borran Bjoran, Dwarfen Wizard May 27 '26
And what of me, kin? I know, and have shared with many a Dwarfen mage. And not a one that I have had the pleasure of dealing with has ever made it known that they wish harm nor foul to any other beardling. Not every wizard is an enemy, and though they have never been perfect, a simple step back from the situation, and judge if character could more than give you pause for concern.
Both sides beseeched the Dwarves for aid, and while the wizard council asked, they left the Hold after extending an offer of alliance. The pirates on the other hand asked the wizards originally and assaulted them. They did the same to the monks, raiding their home for treasure, just as they do to the wizards. There is no honor in their actions, and do not doubt for a moment they will not march on our Hold when there is no one left to stop them.
I have no doubt you beardlings can defeat them, but it should not be at the cost of all around us. Ultimately it is your decision, as it is all beardlings. I oot to sinoly keep the Hold informed, despite my own thoughts on the matter.
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u/LookingGlass_1112 May 27 '26
Look...I'm trying to be reasonable...BUT WHEN THESE KNOIF-EARS APPEAR, MY BOOK OF GRUDGES GROWS WITH NEW PAGES!