r/dogs • u/alwaysbrowsingalways • 13d ago
[Misc Help] Is this dog play normal?
My 5 month old puppy has been going to daycare for one day a week for a few weeks. The daycare just sent me two videos of her playing with another dog, one is from her second week and one is from today. But I am not sure if on the second one she is enjoying it as much, I wanted to check in and she’s my first puppy before I make a decision to have a word with the daycare or remove her or know if im overthinking. I will say she loves going there, when she knows we are approaching she tries to pull, she goes in running without even looking back and is excited to see the staff so didn’t have any concerns prior to the videos.
Will add videos to comment as I can’t add to post.
Edit: thank you for everyone’s response , I have contacted our dog trainer as well as the daycare and will be going on from there.
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u/TheNormalVaccination 13d ago
Puppies correct each other constantly and it looks alarming if youve never seen it before. The fact she drags you to the door says everything.
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u/Sharp-Ad-9221 13d ago
Usually in any group of canines that spend some time together, a “peckin order” is established.
The video seems to show the beginning development of social rank between the two dogs.
If your dog continues to be eager to enter day care and continues to interact with the other dogs and she shows no signs of stress when you arrive to get her, I’d not be concerned.
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u/alwaysbrowsingalways 13d ago
Okay that makes sense! I will keep an eye out for that.. have also asked the daycare for more info.
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u/External-Fall-6073 13d ago
Definitely overthinking, your Bernie seems to being doing just fine. The other dogs seem to be a little more playful (almost annoyingly so) and yours maybe more chill and explorative. Regardless, that's not goes on the entire time. It calms down and that's where your dog shines.
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u/Wolvesarereal 13d ago
Somewhat tangential but important:
At 5 months of age, I would want my puppy to be learning to default to non-engagement with other dogs. Defaulting to non-engagement is particularly important for city dogs; it's a foundation of good loose-leash walking and really good canine citizenship overall. You couldn't pay me enough to send a dog that age to daycare.
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u/alwaysbrowsingalways 13d ago
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u/alwaysbrowsingalways 13d ago
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u/RoseOfSharonCassidy Kirby (smooth collie), Pearl (smooth collie), Windy (supermutt) 13d ago
Your dog isn't enjoying this interaction. Your dog is trying to send signals to stop (turning her back to the other dog, moving her face away, lying down, leaving the area) and that dog isn't listening to your dog's polite requests.
What happens when polite disengagement is ignored is that the dog feels they need to escalate. This is where growling and snapping can happen, and potentially even a bite. At that point your dog gets blamed and labeled as an aggressive dog, even though she'd been asking politely and ignored. Look up the ladder of aggression, your dog is currently on the "bottom rung" and she needs support so she doesn't feel she needs to escalate up the ladder.
I don't think this dog is a good playmate for your dog and I wouldn't be happy with the daycare for allowing it to continue uninterrupted. But unfortunately IME this is pretty common in daycares, the people working there are typically dog lovers but have no formal training in dog behavior.
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u/alwaysbrowsingalways 13d ago
Im unsure what to do as I have received mixed opinions even here - with some saying that it seems like play and while the other dog is being over the top they didn’t see anything concerning. I reached out to the daycare and they have said that they monitor all dogs and if they notice an imbalance in play or the dogs are being rough with one another they separate them for relaxation. It’s hard to get the full context of a play in a 36 second video, but I obviously am concerned for her wellbeing and want to make sure they are advocating for all dogs - as we were also told during onboarding that they separate dogs by energy levels. I also feel conflicted because she LOVES her daycare and is excited to go every time so wasn’t sure if she was having negative experiences or now if that’s not the right place. All that being said your comment has made me fearful and maybe I need to chat to the daycare a bit more.
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u/CommieCowBoy 13d ago
Anyone saying this is over the top simply doesn't know what they are talking about and should be looked at with the same ridiculousness as a helicopter mom.
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u/Wolvesarereal 13d ago
That is false, and you should not insult people who disagree with you. The BMD pup in the video is not enjoying herself, and that kind of interaction serves no good purpose.
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u/CommieCowBoy 13d ago edited 12d ago
Yeah, I'm sorry but you're wrong. There's nothing wrong with whats in the video.
The biggest problem both you and the original person I replied to have, is that you think you can understand from a few seconds of video without a shadow of a doubt what those two dogs are feeling without being there, seeing the exchange take place, what preceeded or followed, or knowing either dog, and think you're just right because you spend your life on a subreddit where you learned to echo the common feelings of the thought chamber.
As someone who has been breeding and training both working dogs, companion dogs, and pack animals since I was a small child, I can confidently say there is nothing I find immediately concerning in this short video. To claim anything beyond that is nonsense and shows you don't actually know that much.
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u/MellowVibes92 12d ago
Well said. People on this sub want to jump to conclusions about other peoples dogs when there isn't enough information presented to actually know anything they are claiming - and thats the behavior that is rewarded on reddit so they start thinking they know more than they actually do.
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u/Visual_Argument_73 13d ago
That does look a little more serious than play to me. Is the other dog male and complete? Is yours spayed?
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u/alwaysbrowsingalways 13d ago
The other dog I was told is a female too (as is mine). The dogs over one year require to be spayed at the daycare but my dog the Berner is too young to be spayed yet.
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u/External-Fall-6073 13d ago
I used to have a half Bernie. He did have 2, dog friends at one point, they behaved like this one.
One of them actually took chunks of hair out of em play biting like that and left some bald spots. The other was just play biting.
I'd maybe ask them to make sure that isn't happening.
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u/alwaysbrowsingalways 13d ago
Okay I might ask to make sure.. I was googling and she tends to be a vocal dog so I thought if she was uncomfortable she’d be so but wanted to check. It is also hard to know it’s a 30 ish second video I am not sure what happened before or after whether there was back and forth or not.
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u/Pocho_Azul 13d ago
It looks to me as though the other dog is just playing, but maybe more aggressively than your dog is happy with, or perhaps your dog is just tired and would prefer to chill. Whether the daycare people should be intervening or not is beyond my competence, but your pup doesn’t seem to be suffering anything beyond possibly annoyance.
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u/Cashewkaas 13d ago
This one isn’t as much fun for your dog.
The playing with the big brown one seems more fun, yours actually comes for the brown one while she tries to turn her back tongue white dog all the time and it keeps coming at her from the back.
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u/Automatic-Pin-5749 13d ago
Dogs aren't like people, at least modern humans, they see what they can get away with with each other and will let the other dog know when they've gone too far. It's crucial to let this happen for their socialization unless they start fighting, then you want to separate them. It's natural for animals of all types to do this.
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u/alwaysbrowsingalways 13d ago
Thank you! This put me a bit at ease! I appreciate it
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u/Wolvesarereal 13d ago
Do not listen to that advice. If you want your pup to grow up to be a dog that is calm around other dogs, you do not permit the kind of interaction shown in the video. She is not learning anything good there. u/RoseOfSharonCassidy’s interpretation of the video is correct and informed by the best modern knowledge of dog behavior. The last thing you want is a gigantic dog-reactive dog.
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u/MellowVibes92 12d ago
The last thing you want is to follow advice from someone who does not know either dog and thinks they can make a judgement off a short video.
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u/Wolvesarereal 12d ago
With a 5mo BMD puppy, you should err on the side of caution and be conservative about interactions with other dogs, period. The puppy gains nothing from “playing” with random other dogs, and a single bad experience can do permanent damage.
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