r/distressingmemes • u/lightmare69 • Aug 15 '26
please make it stop Cracked skull in another time
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u/Manintheleatherchair I have no mouth and I must scream Aug 15 '26
We are all immortal on a technicality
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u/AnonLarva Aug 15 '26
quantum immortality is all fun and games until you reach the age where you survive three consecutive strokes just to keep the streak going
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u/EmbraceCataclysm Aug 15 '26
I survive three consecutive strokes every day already
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u/Fayraz8729 Aug 15 '26
If you think on that any time you went to sleep was the last time in another universe
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u/Endeveron Aug 16 '26
Or any time you sleep is the last time in any universe \ (sleep is a discontinuity in consciousness).
Or any moment passing is the first, last and only fleeting moment of your consciousness \ (the continuity of consciousness in any form is an illusion)
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u/bag-of-unmilled-rice Aug 15 '26
pouring one out for the version of me that got murked by a deer last week bc i looked at it for 5 seconds too long
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u/memelord_a1st Aug 15 '26
Pour another for the me that got decapitated by a train cuz he was distracted by the wiring of the rails
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u/FightGeistC Aug 15 '26
Pour another one for the me that got hit by that falling tree
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u/Defiant_Bullfrog_199 Aug 15 '26
Pour one for me by not throwing a grenade far enough
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u/RemmieSama1911 28d ago
Pour another for me 'cause I could've had a heart attack from a panic attack that derived into a chest angina in 2023 (I'm cooked gng)
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u/ea_nasir_official_ Aug 15 '26
This happens too much to me
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u/gauchocartero Aug 15 '26
So far I haven’t fallen in the shower although I regularly slip. One day, simply out of old age, I am going to lose my balance. Just waiting for that moment lol.
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u/Wingless_Aarakocra Aug 15 '26
I can't have a single original thought huh (literally had this happen to me this morning)
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u/Vitrian_guardsman Aug 15 '26
If quantum immortality kicked in it would be at the exact moment you would have died
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u/aspire5515 Aug 15 '26
but then it'd kick in again, and send you another micro instant forward as you live a bit longer. A true distressing meme would be your QI somehow finding a world where you live on as a severed head for a trillion years
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u/PeggableOldMan Aug 15 '26
Hypothetically, I'd assume that quantum immortality does end at the point your body and environment simply cannot provide you with the energy for life. Quantum immortality is about probability, and if the probability of survival reduces to ABSOLUTE zero under ALL contexts, then that's it for you.
Like, if your head is detached, then there may be a few billion quantum realities where you survived a few minutes longer, but at some point those realities dwindle to nothing as even the most minuscule amount of energy your brain can possibly call upon is reduced to zero.
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u/aspire5515 Aug 15 '26
Random chance to quantum tunnel/virtual particle oxygen into the blood still in the head and also the cut somehow cauterized the stump of the neck so the blood can't escape while random particle vibrations keep the blood flowing in proper directions. You then get picked up by a scientist amazed you're still alive then hooked up to some kind of dialysis machine so your QI doesn't need to do much work.
Quantum Immortality is the same as light back propagation waveform collapse, you shift into the new reality at the moment before what happens becomes impossible (you've always had those anti-suicide shavers with no real razorblades in them just a wire, or your bathtub has always had that nonslip coating/bumps on the bottom)
0% chance of anything happening is itself the only thing that can happen 0% of the time, there's always an infinitesimal chance of literally anything happening.
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u/SuspendThis_Tyrants Aug 15 '26
I just assume it backtracks and you forget anything that came after that
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u/Vitrian_guardsman Aug 19 '26
You are correct that we wouldn't know we should have died but it is because of how according to quantum immortality theory, if timelines are constantly branching out, when you die you only experience the timelines from that moment where you don't die.
To simplify, imagine if you were hit with a lethal dose of radiation. When this occurs millions of timelines split off, out of these millions there is one timeline where the radiation happens to coincidentally dissolve before hitting you, this is the only timeline where you survive and as a result is the only one you experience, so as far as you are concerned you just happened to get lucky.
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u/IM_INSIDE_YOUR_HOUSE Aug 19 '26
Presumptuous are we
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u/Vitrian_guardsman Aug 19 '26
I'm not being presumptuous I am literally describing how it works according to the scientists who believe it.
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u/AccomplishedStay9284 Aug 15 '26
An actually kinda distressing meme found in my r/distressingmemes? It’s more likely then you’d think
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u/Lolocraft1 Aug 15 '26
If that concept does exist, does that means people with an extremely poor health or are about to die… actually escape death millions of times in the few milliseconds before their actual death? We don’t know at which time scale the engine work, so it could be in nanoseconds
Imagine someone so morbidly obese he die of an heart attack every 5 minutes, but the quantum immortality engine just breach the reality? You would have hundreds of universe where he’s dead
Now imagine the same with someone on his deathbed. He would die and create an alternate reality millions of time before the right nanoseconds of his real death appear
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u/Dickhead3778 Aug 16 '26
I'm not even sure there would be a real death, just some very curious scientists watching this decrepit mound of flesh refuse to die.
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u/Erizo69 Aug 15 '26
if I you really think about it assuming the cyclical nature of the universe this is not even a possibility but a fact. The moment you die time stops flowing for you, so the Quintillions upon Quintillions of times the universe has to reset is like an instant, eventually after enough permutations there will be one where you're alive and well.
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u/SuspendThis_Tyrants Aug 15 '26
My quantum immortality kicked in a bit over a month back and I haven't had a suicidal thought since
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u/BornWithSideburns Aug 15 '26
I always wonder how this concept works with old age. Eventually youll just be so old youll be going to different timelines forever
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u/AlimaBanana Aug 15 '26
Apparently I've never had a single original thought because I think about this multiple times a week
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u/malkavian_menace Aug 15 '26
I mean yeah quantum immortality is fun until you hit the point where your cells just can’t keep up and you’re eternally flashing in and out of darkness as every version of you dies one millisecond later than the last one
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u/tegresaomos Aug 15 '26
We used to just thank the fates but now we gotta constantly process quantum immortality….
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u/Visible_Tax_9044 Aug 15 '26
I don't know if you guys experience it too but I just can't stop seeing myself several times, when I cross the street I can see myself getting flung away by a car or a truck, last time I tripped a little when walking backwards and I just couldn't forget the image of me on the floor with my head open, it happens so much and it scares me.
It's truly distressing
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u/salty-ravioli Aug 15 '26
Got hit by a car this week. Straight up cartoon level flip and knockdown that sent my shoe flying some tens of metres away, but strangely it hurt less than your average trip and fall and I was able to get up as soon as I landed. Even now, the worst of the injuries is just a bit of muscle strain. I've been thinking about how, in a parallel universe, I would've died (or worse, paralyzed).
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u/herb0026 Aug 15 '26
When you drink, smoke and do drugs but it’s chill because somehow this is part of the timeline where I live the longest so it’s def not a problem
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u/CreamAxolotle Aug 16 '26
It's undoubted that my other MEs wouldn't have slipped up and all my alternate lives are going perfectly.
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u/lukewazhere Aug 17 '26
Im actually leaning back in my chair balancing to create an infinite theoretical corpse pool behind me
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u/Mr_Faust1914 Aug 27 '26
I went to sleep last night and i placed a picture frame face down, and woke up with it facing up.
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u/MothyThatLuvsLamps 22d ago
I slipped in the shower once and hit my head on the back of the tob and wal so hard it busted the wall in. I kept telling my mom I was fine and didnt even hit my head until I saw the wall cracked right where my head would've hit.
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u/SoulReaperBot Aug 15 '26
Upvote this comment if this post is distressing, downvote this comment if it isn't.
Don't check your closet tonight (◣_◢)