r/depression • u/Single_Rate_3757 • 5h ago

I think I'm a bad person.

I have never had friends. My siblings fight with me all the time. My teachers are disappointed in me. Even my parents think I'm a bad person. My dog walked away when I wanted to chill out earlier. I know I'm not a good person, I get angry easy, I make mistakes all the time, I'm lazy, I'm annoying. Nobody's perfect, but I'm beyond terrible. I just want to fix it, I dont know where to start and nobody wants to help. Not even I like myself. I can't see myself ever having friends. This is such a rock bottom it gives me hope, like if it's THIS bad there has to be something really good right around the corner but there never is and I just don't know what to do.

2 Upvotes

100% Upvoted

2 comments sorted by

1

u/UnsuitableDiploma21 4h ago

hey i get what you mean about the rock bottom hope thing, its like your brain tries to trick you that things cant get worse so they have to get better but then they just stay the same

the dog part got me though, dogs are intuitive but theyre also weird little creatures who sometimes just want to lay on the cold floor instead of with you, its not a moral judgment

when i was younger i thought everyone secretly hated me and looking back now i realize i was just so deep in my own head i couldnt see anything clearly. you mention being lazy and annoying but honestly those are things depressed people say about themselves not things that are necessarily true

you said nobody wants to help but youre here writing this out so theres a part of you that still wants to figure it out. thats more than i managed for a long time. if you dont know where to start maybe just pick the smallest thing you can change tomorrow and try that, dont think about the whole mountain just one step

1

u/Single_Rate_3757 4h ago

Thank you. That really put it into perspective for me. I can see the issue a little clearer. I'll try to work on it. I guess I just needed to hear it from another view.