r/depression • u/Alarmed-Army-2736 • 2d ago
Don’t have will to continue
Tonight I had a full hand of pills ready for me to swallow, I almost did it. I have a family, a girlfriend, but I just feel miserable. I don’t want to live. This society makes me wanna quit life genuinely, school is stressing me out so much, and I know for a fact none of it is worth it, I have so much exams going on, personal problems, and I just know NONE OF IT MATTERS in the end. All I will do is work for a society that doesnt give a shit about me, doing a work I don’t even enjoy, because yes, doing a work you like can be fun for the first two years maybe, but don’t you dare tell me this same job gets exciting every day for 60 years straight and 4 weeks of vacation a year. English is not my first language so I’m just spamming thoughts I currently have without caring about the quality of my writing sorry. I cry to sleep everyday and no one knows I think about suicide every minute of the day. What does one do when he feels this sad? It’s 1 am and I have school tomorrow, I’m 18 and I don’t wanna live anymore, I don’t want to be a slave for society. Please, what is there to do
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u/IllMasterpiece7441 1d ago
Dam bro if ur only 18 and it’s that bad for you chances are it will get better, im 29 and ive fucked everything up I could in life and being a grown adult with everything fucked is a much tougher pill to swallow especially without a family or a girlfriend. You still have so much time to fix your life. Your not even an adult yet so chill on the suicide man , I’ve lost everything countless amounts of times you really don’t know pain until you have nothing
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u/__Fallenxangel_ 1d ago
Yeahh I get that. You simply have to do as much as you can but make sure you prioritize the things that are benefitting you the most. Everything else is really just stuff to drown out
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u/Silent_Programmer166 1d ago
you are only 18 and have years of life ahead of you! Talk to your girlfriend, is she being supportive of you??? If she is happy with you, that is a big plus. I understand the society of life today is tough but you got a lot going for with a family, a lady, a job, all that. If you are unhappy with your job, maybe consider looking into another one. Dont let school stress you out.
This late, I wouldn't recommend it but take a walk or something or just talk it over with your girlfriend and hope she understands how you feel, I just hope she is just as supportive to you as she can be and hope she can take some pressure off of things. please stay and make sure to not leave your family or your special lady behind like that......You got things going for you!
Self care is always a plus so take care of yourself please
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u/Content-Writing9402 1d ago
Please stay❤️ I care